Forever In My Thoughts
by Bailieboro
Summary: Arthur maintains Camelot's smooth running, allowing him to keep certain priorities straight.
1. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER 1 : OIL OF CAMPHOR**

The last of the season's leaves ripped from the branches, were falling over Camelot as Merlin lowered himself onto the bed until he was lying on his right side. He sighed; he'd been waiting for this since midmorning. Arthur was still moving around in the bedchamber but he'd told Merlin to go to bed without him. He could hear him; he closed his eyes. It had been the first time that he'd had a moment to himself all day. He felt weight on the bed and warm hands on him.

"Arthur, what are you doing?"

"I'm going to massage your shoulder!"

"You haven't got a clue about massaging. I'd prefer to have Gaius do it as he'll at least accomplish something. You'll just be messing and I'll end up having to change the sheets and clean up after you. Anyway, I warmed that oil for my shoulder not your hands."

Arthur smiled to himself and continued to rub ineffectually at Merlin's left shoulder. "I won't hurt you! Have I ever hurt you?" Leaning over he kissed the offending injury. "Did no one ever tell you that stairs are dangerous when wet? Merlin, you really need to take better care of yourself."

"It'll be fine in a few days, Gaius called it a minor sprain."

"...and bruising, some areas are blue." Merlin tried to wriggle away but Arthur had his other hand on the bed in front of him. He was held captive. "You can sleep on my side of the bed so that I can still see you when you're sleeping on you right side."

"No, I'm sleeping alone tonight."

"Why?"

"Because I'm injured"

"That never stopped you sharing before." Arthur again kissed his shoulder.

"A suggestion, Arthur, stop kissing me; the oil will numb your lips. You will be useless even if I sleep with you. Gaius mixed camphor and cloves in the oil for me."

Arthur pulled back and realised that his lips were beginning to tingle. "Kiss me, Merlin, then we'll..." He lifted his fingers to feel his lips.

Merlin grabbed his hand, "Don't! You'll make it worse. Let me get some cloths and clean you off." He winced as he lifted himself into position to swing his legs off the bed. Gaius had given him another mixture which he could use to alleviate the sensation of the camphor if he found it uncomfortable. He handed Arthur a larger piece of linen and told him to get as much oil off his hands as possible

Arthur had licked his lips, scrunching up his face before shaking his head. Merlin said over his shoulder, "Now go and wash your hands thoroughly, use soap and a clean cloth and don't touch your face again, then sit near the window, the cool air will help."

Arthur ever obedient did as he was told. His lips were beginning to burn slightly. He put his forehead against the glass it was cold and then let his lips touch the glass as well.

Merlin came back with some pieces of linen, a small bowl of water and a covered clay pot. His hands were wet and he shook them to get rid of the water droplets. "Arthur, stop kissing the window, anyone in the courtyard will wonder what you are doing." Arthur turned and looked sorrowful and Merlin had to smile.

"I don't think you realise how sore my lips are," Arthur moaned.

"Well, don't touch anything...!" Merlin put one of the smaller cloth into the warm water and soaked it. He grabbed Arthur's chin and wiped his face where he could see the oil glistening. Throwing the rag on the table, he took a second one and did the same. "How does that feel?"

"Strange, do my lips look huge because they feel it?"

"No, you look surprisingly normal..."

"Well, I don't feel it. It's your fault as you didn't tell me not to get in on my lips!"

"How was I to know that you were going to kiss away my pain? I'd already rubbed some oil on and was going to just leave it."

"Well, you're no cat and you were twisting yourself like a contortionist so I decided to help...you could say thank you and when I was little, if I fell and hurt myself Gaius used to say, 'Come here, let me kiss it better!' Anyway, you are not adverse to kisses are you?"

Merlin smiled and leant over to kiss Arthur's brow. "Your lips will be out of commission for at least four hours. Shame really, as I was just thinking what kissable lips you have..."

Arthur grinned, "But I have other kissable parts..."

"I don't intend to risk it as I don't know where else you touched yourself. How about your ears?"

"I don't think so. Can't you just smell them to see if they are all right?"

"Arthur, I'm covered in the stuff as well, smelling you would make no sense." He looked at him as he sat forlornly at the window every now and then smacking his lips together. "Let me wash my hands again and then I'll put on some of the soothing agent. It won't cure it but it should relieve the burning if not the loss of feeling."

Arthur was actually a good patient not that he could be anything else when Merlin started kissing up his neck to his ears. He knew Merlin had a method in this madness and Arthur in no time was like putty in his hands. He almost jumped out of his skin when Merlin after whisperings sweet nothings in his ear, suddenly licked the shell and nibbled the rim. He pushed against him making Merlin laugh.

"You're so easy, Arthur!"

Arthur smiled, "Only for you!" However, the hardest thing was not grabbing Merlin to claim his lips.

Merlin smiled to himself and remembered his mam saying, 'Don't run on wet stairs and...some people learn better by experience.' Arthur and he were like peas in pod, they complemented each other. He shivered...

"Merlin, put on your dressing robe as you're cold. Let's sit by the fire," he smiled, "...and I'll bring my ears with me."

"How are your lips feeling? Do you feel up to joining the others for supper? Do you think you could eat? I could tie a linen cloth around your neck in case you dribble."

Arthur looked at him shocked, "Are you serious, I'm going to dribble?" He walked to the table and took his goblet and added a splash of wine. He raised it to his lips and realised he had less control than normal he managed to swallow most of it but a three or four drips ran down his chin and he grabbed for one of the damp cloths on the table.

Merlin's hand stilled his as he said, "Don't touch them, they have oil on them." He removed the goblet he'd used and threw Arthur another clean cloth and bundled the others into the flames where they momentarily burst into a bright green flame. Arthur was impressed.

Supper was a quiet affair with just the two of them. Arthur after little success passed on the soup but managed to eat the rest of the meal without too much trouble.

"How long, Merlin?"

"How long what?"

"Until my lips will return to normal?"

"I promise that when you wake up in the morning, it will only be a memory."

-0-0-

The following morning, Merlin sat in front of the fire in the physician's chamber with one elbow on the table and his head in his right hand. Gaius was working on his shoulder. He had told him of yesterday afternoon's episode with Arthur and his camphor lips.

"Maybe it would be better if I kept all medications down here as you obviously weren't watching him."

"I didn't know that he was going to try to give me a massage and then he must have touched his lips and disaster."

Merlin decided that he would save Arthur the embarrassment of mentioning the kiss.

"Is he all right now? Should I check on him?"

"No, he's fine but he learnt his lesson of playing with massage oils. He wants to know if you'd like to join us for supper."

"One night and two invitations…I've agreed to dine with Geoffrey and one of his old friends who is visiting Camelot. Make my apologies to Arthur and maybe suggest another night."

"You'll be sorry," said Merlin, "As we're having braised rabbit with turnip." Gaius's eyes brightened so Merlin added, "I'll bring you any that is left over. Trevor and Henry went hunting and snared a couple of rabbits and he gave them to us as a gift. We sort of have to eat them as he's still a little tentative on foot in the woods after that first rabbit hunting episode and being surprised by the boar. Arthur made a great fuss over them. He'd prefer venison or boar but I'm happy with rabbit…I was raised on it."

Gaius finished the massage and put a piece of fleece over Merlin's shoulder. That will give you added warmth. Let me know how it goes and take it easy. Don't let Arthur run you ragged." He smiled as he added, "I could give you a doctor's note."

Merlin grinned having a flash of his waving the note in Arthur's face when he had any bright ideas of what they might get up to. "Sorry, Gaius, don't think it would work but you never know, keep it in mind as it might be useful one day. Have a nice supper with Geoffrey."

Making his way up the stairs to the royal corridor, Merlin kept flexing his shoulder. It certainly felt a lot better than two days ago when he'd hit it on the edge of the steps. He nodded at the guards at the top of the stairs and made his way along the corridor. He remembered how Uther always had guards right outside his door but Arthur had opted for more privacy removing the guards and relocating them at the top of the stairs.

Arthur was out with the knights on a mission and wouldn't be back until later on. Merlin knew that Thomas would have everything in hand so he wandered over to Uther's apartments to see how the renovations were progressing. Arthur and he had studied the work plans and were satisfied that with a little tweaking, they could make the place like home.

To keep down the dust, a huge curtain had been hung across the corridor and another one across the antechamber door. Workmen were everywhere and they nodded pleasantly at him. He was in their eyes the trusted manservant of the king and he was a pleasure to deal with as he had a friendly outgoing manner and seemed agreeable to most things.

Uther's quarters were spacious and included the separate quarters for a consort. The antechamber had three chambers off it as well as a door leading to an interior hallway and the king's private chambers. Merlin remembered standing in the antechamber and watching Arthur walk the length of that hallway to reach his father's room where he was laid out. There was an adjoining door which opened to three chambers for the queen which was also accessed by a servants' staircase from the floor below.

He remembered how Arthur had said on one of their earlier visits, "If either of us decide to have affairs, we can shove the visiting party into the queen's quarters so they can escape unnoticed and we can keep our secret."

"That's an awful thing to say. I would never cheat on you, I'm sorry if you don't feel the same way."

He felt arms wrap around him and pull him into a strong chest as Arthur said, "Merlin, for heaven's sake, it was supposed to be a joke but I guess it wasn't very funny. You're all I want or need. Sorry…am I forgiven?"

"That depends, I will have to compare you to my current paramour and see who scores the highest?"

Arthur's jaw dropped, Merlin had a paramour. Then it dawned on him that he was being teased and he said grinning, "Bring him on, as I presume he is a he."

Merlin laughed and grabbed Arthur, "You are sufficient to my needs and a handful to boot." He allowed Arthur to kiss him and managed to manoeuvre him over to the windowsill for lack of anywhere else to sit. "One day, we'll have this whole area to ourselves, we can even have Treva stay over in one of the extra bedchambers."

"I think, maybe that I prefer to keep you all to myself…we wouldn't want Treva wandering in unannounced now, would we? Anyway, it would curb your style as you could no longer wander around in the buff, don't want to give the poor boy nightmares." Arthur couldn't add anything more as Merlin had taken a sudden desire to kiss him. They broke apart when they were getting light headed from lack of oxygen. "You know, you are the greatest kisser…"

"Had much experience with other people?" Merlin asked.

"No. not really, I just know that you are the best!"

"Well then, I believe we should add another contest at next year's tournament, Lip to Lip Combat!"

Arthur laughed, "We'd be the only contestants and win the pennant, unless you can think of other knights who are similarly involved."

"No, not really…" He had his suspicions but that was not information which was his to share. "Maybe, it should just be by drawing a name from a hat." He started to laugh, "Can you imagine Gawaine and Leon?"

Suddenly looking serious, Arthur said, "No, but I can see you and Gawaine. He'd do anything for you and if you asked him, he'd enter if you were going to be one of the competitors."

"Gawaine has no interest in me and I certainly have no interest in him beyond being a good friend."

"Not even a little bit?"

"No…! Arthur, what do you take me for? He's just a hugger and he has never stepped out of line with me. Anyway, I wouldn't be competing as it would only by for knights."

"Mark my words, Merlin, Gawaine is attracted to you. He'd die for you if the situation arose."

"As he would for you…"

"He'd have to as I'm his monarch and he swore allegiance to me."

"Will I ever get to swear allegiance to you?"

"You already did, the first day that you showed me you were interested in me and I kissed you. Kiss me, Merlin, as I did you that day." Merlin placed a chaste kiss on Arthur's lips and then stood up to leave. "Where are you going?"

"Well, that's what you did! You kissed me and then ran away and I didn't see you until the next morning. I had an awful night, wondering if I was wrong and you were going to have me killed for tempting the crown prince of Camelot."

Arthur stood up, "Come on, we're going back to our chambers, so that you can tempt me to your heart's content and body's desire."

Merlin jumped as Arthur grabbed his shoulders dragging him to the door saying, "Come on!"

Merlin smiled as he looked around the chambers, he wondered how long memories remained as a person grew older. When the two of them were old and grey would they remember? Would he still remember everything? He hoped so.

He nodded at the workmen on their way out and the two of them made their way back to their chambers.

Wandering down the deserted corridor Merlin asked, "What are you going to do with the consort's apartments?"

"Well, I thought that they would be your private chambers. If I felt like it I could come and visit you overnight or not…We'd both have big beds and sleep very comfortable alone."

Merlin turned and said, "Glad you told me that ahead of time as I have no intention of sleeping alone so if you are not interested in my body then maybe I will have to seriously consider finding someone else to keep me company."

"Over my dead body!" said Arthur as he grabbed Merlin by the waist and drew him into their bed chamber.


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER 2 : OUTING ON THE HORIZON**

As Simon was away visiting his mother, Arthur, Merlin and Spenser ate the rabbits. They were excellent, the cook had been quite liberal with the red wine and Spenser suggested that Merlin should get the recipe so that when he cooked on hunting trips, he could replicate the meal. Merlin was less than flattering in his reply causing Arthur to laugh.

They sat discussing old times, reminiscing about first meetings. Arthur had known Spenser it seemed like forever as he was born and raised in Camelot the younger son of Sir Rodney of Sherewell and his wife Lady Jayne. He was a few years younger than Arthur as his older brother Piers had originally been Arthur's friend.

Merlin had been at Camelot for a few years when his intervention into a visiting lord's questionable behaviour had saved a young page. Subsequently that page called Simon had always seen Merlin as his guardian angel and had trailed after him whenever possible. It was the closest to a little brother that Merlin had ever had. As he grew, the friendship had remained and often as a squire Simon was chosen to accompany the crown prince on outings. Soon he was automatically called upon as he was useful, tight-lipped and a pleasure to have around with a knack of anticipating requests. Now a knight, he was in the inner circle of Arthur's friends. His family was also represented at Camelot by his brother Guy currently a squire.

While it was still early, Spenser left as he wanted to check on the preparations for what was to be the last extended hunt of the season. He hoped that Simon would be back to enjoy it as he missed his company.

Arthur had decided to spend a few days with a select number of knights at the hunting lodge. It would be the first time that anyone apart from workmen had stayed overnight. Spenser had accepted the challenge of drawing up lists of squires who would attend them, the numbers of grooms and hunt servants as well as pack horses needed to carry their kills back to the kitchens at Camelot. He was also in charge of notifying the kitchens of what food they would need. They would rely on their own hunting skills for meat but vegetables, seasonal fruits and general supplies were needed. Arthur had also suggested that two men be brought from the kitchens so Merlin would be free to enjoy himself.

"Lovely thought, Arthur! Now instead of staying in camp near the fire, I will be able to traipse after you in all weather while you terrorize all the little bunnies and deer."

"Merlin, at this time of year, all the little bunnies are grown up and venison is a staple in the castle so unless you want to go hungry, thank God for the bounties of the earth. Anyway, we will be staying in the lodge and you can stay dry and warm overnight."

Merlin smiled. Arthur and he had visited the lodge while it was being built to check that their plans were being carried out. Arthur had insisted that their chamber was out of the way and that there was also a primitive water closet to alleviate those necessary trips outside to 'pick a tree'.

Merlin when he had heard this was shocked. "So, will everyone and his uncle be traipsing through our chamber to use it?"

"No silly, it will be private. That is unless you want to invite a few of our friends to use it." Merlin shook his head. "Anyway, they are strong healthy men and a trip outside during the night isn't going to kill any of them."

"You will not be popular when they find out…"

"I'm always popular Merlin because I'm the king!"

Merlin opened his mouth to say something and Arthur grabbed him pulling him down to sit beside him in front of the fire.

Lying against him, Merlin thought that he would be just as happy to pass on the hunting expedition but he knew that if the weather held, it could be enjoyable. It would be fun to stay in the new lodge for the first time and rearrange things which were not to his liking. He knew that Arthur had arranged for proper iron grills to be installed in the large stone hearth so maybe they could even look forward to bread. Anyway, time would tell…he knew that Arthur was looking forward to spending an inaugural night in the lodge and knowing Arthur he intended to make it a celebratory one as well.

Merlin came back to the present as Arthur was loosening the laces on his tunic. He smiled thinking how wonderful it was to be so in love that you trust someone completely. Then he thought of all the people who were pretending that they loved their partner and suffered in silence the intimacy. He thought about Camelot and he felt that most of the couples in the castle were happy being with their spouses and he turned his attention to what Arthur was doing to him. He was happy, no one compared to Arthur and although they had had minor rough spots, his heart still raced when he caught him looking at him across a crowded room.

-0-0-

He woke to the sun which although lower on the horizon still flooded parts of their room with sunlight. He knew that he was wakening later every day but as Arthur's day really didn't start until after he'd had breakfast, he lay still luxuriating in the comfortable bed and the knowledge that just a hand's breath away was Arthur.

He was so used to another person beside him when he slept that he had trouble settling alone. It was worse when they were on outings with visiting knights. Many times he'd distanced himself from Arthur before the camp awoke, worrying that one day he would get caught. He smiled; one morning he had been awoken by someone continually jabbing him in the calf. He turned around and it was Gawaine who smiling apologetically had whispered, "Merlin, let go of Arthur, we're not alone!"

Merlin realised that he'd been sleeping with his head on Arthur's chest oblivious to their whereabouts. Gawaine had saved the day as across the glen, the knights of Lord Cyprian were already stirring. Late in the day, Arthur had mentioned the fact and Gawaine had nodded, "Part of my job to make sure that you are safe from dangers including rumours."

Later, Arthur kidded Merlin saying, "If you have a pressing need to hold someone during the night, might I suggest Gawaine, I know he'd appreciate it and I trust him."

Laughing Merlin said, "Don't think, I'm going to let go of you that easily." He thought of the hunting lodge and knew that there was plenty of room for a fair sized party to be housed. Arthur had insisted that covered areas for grooms and horses be incorporated into the plans. He knew that the squires and pages would sleep in any available spaces in the lodge proper and if the party was small, a room could be allocated to them.

Most people were used to sleeping outdoors, taking advantage of any enclosed area which they could find. If nothing was available they'd lie in the open. There was a hierarchy of sleeping roll placement with Arthur received the best position closest to the fire if it were a cold night and the others fanning out around him as protection. Not too close as to be seen as crowding but close enough that if attacked they could encircle their king. If the area seemed questionable sentries were always placed. They rotated among all the members of the group with Arthur insisting on taking his turn as warranted.

Arthur stretched and brought Merlin out of his reverie. He slipped out of bed, going to the water closet he placed his hand in the pitchers of water on the side table and with a quick whispered spell, hot water was available. He then unlocked the door into the antechamber and brought in the breakfast left by Thomas. There was a note on the sideboard from Leon, asking to see Arthur at his earliest convenience. Merlin put in on the table with the breakfast.

"You're up and busy and I haven't even got out of bed. Is it late?" Arthur said.

"No, I let you sleep in for a few moments as you deserve being pampered every once in a while. But if you get up now, there's hot water and breakfast on the table."

Arthur made his way to the table and seeing the note opened it. "Do you know what this is about?"

"No, Thomas must have put it on the tray early this morning and it can't be too important or Leon would have woken us."

"Send word, that I'll see him immediately. Also, advance the after lunch meeting with the senior squires to this morning. I want to go down to the stables and check on the horses and then we're gong to ride up to Baskers as Rook mentioned there is a rumour of a large wolf roaming the area and I'd like to check to see if it's worth organising a hunt."

Merlin ate with Arthur and then left him to find a page. Usually during the mornings, the pages were at school but as they were the messengers inside the castle, a few were always strategically located to run messages. Merlin went to the head of the stairs and asked the guards to send a page to the king's chambers.

Within a short while, there was a timid tapping at the outer door and Merlin left Arthur to tighten up his own belt and went to answer it. To his surprise Treva and Henry were standing there with serious expressions on their faces. Henry said, "Good morning, Sir, we were told that the king needed a page."

Treva was beaming at Merlin as he whispered, "This is our first ever summons and we're so excited."

Merlin smiled proudly and invited the two of them into the main chamber. "Arthur, we have a page here to deliver your message."

Arthur said, "You take care of it, just tell him to be quick as Sir Leon might have gone on to something else.

Clearing his throat, Merlin caused Arthur to look up and he saw the two young boys. "Well, well, well! This is a pleasant surprise."

"Arthur, it's our first time out to deliver messages and we have to stay together in case we get lost."

"Rightly so, the castle is a big place and we don't know everyone who might be around." Then becoming the king again, he said, "Pages, take this note to Sir Leon!" He smiled at Treva and his best friend as he added, "Remember your manners the two of you and Treva, you are not acting as my ward but as a page of Camelot."

"Yes, Sire!" The two boys said in unison, bowing smartly and rushing out of the room in search of Sir Leon.

Arthur turned to Merlin and said, "He's growing up so fast, his first time delivering a message. I hope that the two of them don't get distracted and get that note to Leon before nightfall."

Merlin smiled, it was cute seeing Treva working as a page and he was pleased to see that at his age they still were delivering messages in pairs. He thought back, that had come as a direct response by the Ladies of the Court after the fiasco with the eight year old Simon. What Arthur had said about the castle being big was true but sometimes the problem was more with the people in the castle than the chance that the little boys might get lost. Anyway, the ladies in charge of the pages were always careful. Older squires usually dealt with strangers but every now and again regardless of how careful people were, some child would fall through the cracks and problems would ensue.

Not all of the pages and squires were related to knights and had their families in the castle. Often boys belonging to other important families were sent to Camelot to be trained and Camelot had to vouch for their safety. He smiled recalling the young squires he had seen in their mother's arms as babies and the younger brothers of some of his friends among the knights.

"You're quiet," said Arthur breaking into his thoughts.

"Yes, just thinking of all the knights who have younger brothers among the squires, especially Simon's brother Guy and Timothy, Gielbert's brother."

Merlin nodded and unconsciously put his hand to the back of his head. They were the squires who had found him after Neville's surprise attack.

"Come here, Merlin, don't go back there. By the way I saw…"

They were interrupted by a knock on the door as Thomas announced that Sir Leon had arrived.

"Send him in." said Arthur with a smile as at least the boys had been successful.

"Just was delivered a note by two very capable pages. Treva asked me to identify myself before he handed me your note. It was quite amusing. When I confirmed who I was, I was given a big smile and handed the note. Gosh, he's growing up so fast."

"Glad, he was on his best behaviour as I had visions of him finding you and yelling for you to stop as he had a note from his father." Arthur motioned to the table and they sat, "Your note was waiting for us when Merlin dragged his lazy body out of bed and got the breakfast."

"Excuse me? I was lazy, wonderful how I had hot water ready and your breakfast on the table and you were still lying in bed."

The three of them laughed. Leon loved listening to the king and his former manservant bicker; it was a pure pleasure to see Arthur so relaxed with Merlin. Leon said, "The news I have is only sketchy but reports are coming back from Stonefield concerning disturbances with casualties in that area."

"Same area as two years ago?"

"Yes!"

"When did a detail of knights and soldiers last visit the place?"

"Six months according to the reports and no mention was made of any problems."

"Send say, four knights and ten armed men. Maybe just the fact that they arrive will settle the locals. Where there any suggestions as to who or what was causing the problem?"

"No, Sire." Leon handed him a much folded parchment note and Arthur read it before passing it to Merlin.

"Isn't that near Roxeter where Simon was going?" Merlin asked.

Leon nodded, "Maybe a half days ride away."

Arthur said, "He should be all right as he said that he intended to keep to the main Roman roads and not do any cross country riding as it wouldn't shorten the journey by much."

Merlin decided to mention it to Spenser. He didn't want to worry him but it was better to be forewarned. He couldn't see Simon getting involved in anything as he was travelling alone and all knights knew that discretion was the better part of valour.

"Leon, mention to the senior knight in the expedition that Simon is in the area, he might be useful to them." Leon left.

-0-0-

Merlin said, "As we're riding out, you should put on the padded doublet and your heavy cloak."

Arthur turned smiling, "Merlin, I'm the one who seems to be quite capable of choosing clothes that will keep me warm. Do you ever see me moaning of the cold and shivering?"

Merlin gave him the 'let's not play that game' look saying, "…and who exactly lays out the clothes that you wear?" Arthur had the sense to keep quiet. "I do, you just stand there to be waited upon."

"Not always, sometimes I take the initiative…"

"We're talking about dressing, at the moment, Arthur!"

"Well, after we've finished discussing clothes, I would like to initiate something more interesting!"

Arthur had won his point and Merlin smiled shaking his head as Arthur took hold of his shoulders and kissed him saying, "…and you, Merlin, will also put on a padded doublet and a heavy cloak before we go out…"


	3. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER 3 : NEVER CRY WOLF**

Iago and Favoury were chosen as mounts for the outing, Spenser and Romney joining Arthur and Merlin with two squires and two other knights. They were followed by a huntsman with two couples of hounds and a groom with a loaded pack pony.

Merlin smiled, he knew a certain young page who was going to be very disappointed when he realised that he had not been invited to join the outing. Mind you, he reminded himself that the villagers could have been wrong and it might just have been a rogue dog which had been causing the problems.

Wolves were numerous and often hunted at the end of winter for their luxurious pelts which were used by the rich for bedding and decoration for winter clothing. Visiting dignitaries often presented their hosts with wolf skins. A hunter could make a handsome amount for a skin in good condition. The majority of sightings were exactly that, a wolf pack sighted across the valley or on the edges of the forests. Their howls were heard but seldom so close to a village as to cause alarm.

Hunting in the king's hunting reserves was limited to certain individuals. Gamekeepers in the king's employ kept down the wolves thereby protecting deer and boar. As a pack, wolves could take a boar which would be a loss to the king's hunting parties as to kill a boar was a privilege and usually accomplished by finally dismounting and dealing the death blow with a dagger. This being considered an honourable way for a knight to dispatch the animal.

Locals were forbidden from hunting in royal reserves and severely punished if caught. The amount of poaching was high but only the bravest daring to take a deer.

"I heard a wolf once, while I was in Ealdor."

"Guess it must have been really desperate to try to communicate with you, Merlin. You'd have little to offer mentally and physically, they'd be done with you in one gulp." Arthur grinned across at Merlin whom he could see had huffed and was concentrating on a swift reply.

Not to be outdone, Merlin said, "Well, I guess quality is better than quantity!" He put his heels to Iago and the fiery chestnut took off followed almost instantly by the grey Favoury. The laughter of the knights echoed in the distance as the two horses raced ahead on the path.

They let the horses get it out of their system and then slowed down waiting for the others to catch up. By continuing at a steady trot, Spenser decided to give Merlin and Arthur some time alone. It was a good decision as when they finally arrived to where the other horses were tied up, Merlin had a rather dishevelled look and Arthur was grinning.

Arthur said quietly to Spenser, "Thanks, that was appreciated."

"Any time, Sire," Spenser said and turned to wink at Merlin who gave him a grin.

Once they were remounted, they continued to Baskers. Farm hands in the fields saw the arriving cavalcade and announced it to the village as they returned home not wanting to miss whatever was going to happen.

The word went around that the king had arrived and most of the villages turned out to see him. Arthur had told Merlin to bring some silver with him which he gave to the head villager for the people. The groom dismounted and removed four sacks of grain from the pony; supplies before the arrival of the winter proper were always valued as no one knew how long the cold weather would last.

Arthur and a few knights were escorted into the alehouse and sat listening to the people who had not only seen the animal but had also suffered the loss of chickens and one sheep. Merlin stayed outside talking to some of the villagers, they were in awe of him because he was in the king's party but he soon had them relaxed as he asked them questions about their farming techniques showing that he was one of them.

He was interested to hear that the annual flooding of their fields in the spring was looked upon as a positive event as the rocky land seemed to retain soil once the floods had left. One woman offered to show him the difference in her plot which was regularly flooded and her neighbour's which was not. True to her description, the depth of the soil over the shale was better on her patch of land.

She confided in Merlin that the 'Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away' and seemed very pleased that she had remembered that phrase. She explained that a man of the cloth had visited them one summer. Merlin recognised her description of a monk in a rough habit. He'd stayed with them for one season and he and the village women and children had diligently collected herbs and planted them closer to their houses. Many of the older women had helped him prepare unguents or salves especially for burns.

Fires were unprotected as they were the source of not only heat but a place for cooking. Children and the elderly sometimes fell into the fire, children often fascinated by the warmth and the colours and the elderly by misadventure, stumbling or over balancing. Merlin remembered a neighbour in Ealdor who regularly tied her toddlers to the legs of the table so that they could not approach the open fire. He had mentioned it to his mother who had assured him that it wasn't because she thought they were dogs but that they were very precious and she wanted to keep them safe.

"Did you ever tie me up?" He had wanted to know.

"Just with my love!" His Mam had said and hugged him close to her. Merlin felt the rush of love and the longing to see his mother. He would again this winter try to encourage her to stay in Camelot and maybe assist Gaius but he knew she was independent and felt that her place as healer was within her own village.

Arthur had at one point said that he could send knights to bring her to Camelot but Merlin had shaken his head. Forcing someone against his will was wrong. An adult should have the right to make his or her own decision and live by the consequences.

He came to, hearing the woman confide in him that she once had twin boys and had taken her eyes off them and one had fallen into the stream and had been carried away. She said sadly, "Here one minute and gone the next…"

An older man with a crutch sitting on a bench outside a house called out to know if Merlin was there to kill the wolf. Merlin asked the man if he had seen it. The man shook his head but being happy to talk and having a captive audience pleased him and he was off. "In my grandfather's day, one winter was so cold …"

"How cold was it, Bert?" said another man shuffling over to sit beside him.

"'Arry don't interrupt, this young man wants to know about the wolves." Merlin smiled as Bert continued, "My grandfather was only a boy but the whole area was in the grip of winter for so long that the streams and pond froze. The wolves came down from the hills and circled his village. The howling was non-stop and as they got closer, the people locked themselves into their homes and blocked up the windows.

"Some smart folk had brought their chickens and sheep into their homes and others watched in horror as sheep and the previous spring's lambs were grabbed and dragged off."

"Well, I can go one better!" said 'Arry. "My great grandmother told her daughter who was my grandmother, who told her daughter my Mam who told me…"

"Get on with it 'Arry, the man doesn't have all day!" interrupted Bert.

"Well, believe it or not…it was so cold that the ground couldn't be dug and the stone cairns placed over the bodies of the people who had died because of the cold were dug up and bodies removed by the wolves."

Merlin took all this in and decided that this little point might be interesting to run by Gaius when he got back. He wondered why the wolves had not hunted the deer which would have been slowed down by the depth of the snow. He was soon to find out.

Bert said, "You see, Sir, the summer before had been a bad one, weather scorching, crops failing, leaves falling off the trees and people and animals dying from lack of food, even the wild animals. My grandmother said that the ponds and streams dried up and you could just walk out and lift fishes out of the little puddles which were left. People died from eaten roots and tree bark which were bad for them. The rains didn't come until it was winter and then they turned to snow and we were caught in the village until the next spring. Babies died and no one wanted to bury them in case the wolves came back so the dead were wrapped in sacks and placed on the roof of the cottages until the earth could be opened. Mind you, the ground was so hard no graves could 'ave bin dug anyway."

Merlin had heard about that happening and Arthur had once mentioned that as a squire he and a group of others had been sent off to count livestock which had survived the winter. They travelled with supplies for the villages which had been isolated. His father intended to replace animals which had died in villages in the kingdom. It had upset Arthur seeing starving people and animals and he had even at that early age helped bury the dead once the land had thawed.

Merlin's thoughts were interrupted by someone saying, "So, are you here to kill the wolf?"

Merlin smiled it was a young boy, all ready for the excitement.

"Well, we have to locate it and then the king will probably kill it. Do you have many wild dogs around here?"

Bert interrupted him by saying, "Young man, we are quite able to tell the difference between a wolf and a wild dog, aren't we, Men?" They all agreed.

Spenser appeared and called, "Merlin, Arthur wants you!"

Merlin turned calling over his shoulder, "Thanks for your help, we'll do our best to get rid of your wolf."

-0-0-

Arthur and his men now had more knowledge about the wolf. Spenser felt that it was a loner as no one had mentioned a pack. The sooner they found and dispatched it; the sooner they could return home. He knew that for Arthur half the fun was the hunt but if they were hunting an old or ill wolf the pelt would be mediocre and not worth all the fuss.

"We'll camp at the end of the valley and check out prints around one of the ponds. One of the locals will lead us."

Merlin chattered all the way to the end of the valley telling Arthur about Bert and 'Arry.

Arthur said, "At the rate you're going you will be an expert on wolves. Fancy a job working in the royal forest?"

"If I had been dissatisfied with my present position, I would have let you know. So don't go making any plans."

"Is it your position or the perks which have you tied to this job?"

Merlin blushed and said cheekily, "Ask me tonight?"

Arthur burst out laughing as Romney rode up saying that their guide advised stopping at the top of the hill ahead of them. Pushing their horses to canter, they soon arrived. "Arthur, this is one of the last areas where the wolf has been frequently seen."

"We'll set up camp a little lower on this hill. Tell the huntsman I'd like to see him." Romney rode off and returning with the man. Arthur said as the man acknowledged him with a bow, "We have two chances to get this animal if he is in the area…late this afternoon or early tomorrow morning. Once the sun goes down take the hounds around that lower section and see what they pick up. Look for deer carcasses and the like, then report to me. Otherwise, I'll see you here at dawn tomorrow."

The group of riders made their way down into a natural basin in the land surrounded by large rocks. There was a stream nearby so the horses were watered and tied up.

Spenser hoped aloud that there would be caves or at least somewhere to shelter. He went off exploring with Sir Robin of Northanger, one of the other knights. Within a quarter hours walk, the land had risen sharply and he could see rocky outcroppings, this would indicate the possible presence of caves he decided. They climbed up one section and sure enough, they could see cracks and crevices that might be suitable shelter if not actual caves. There were lots of animals tracks around one cave in which there were bones of what were probably deer or maybe livestock.

"This would suit people, it's dry and large enough," said Robin, he moved to the next crevice and pulling back the ivy and bushes crying out in surprise. "This is perfect, look there's a fire pit so people must have used it before."

Spenser joined him and agreed the two caves were good enough. Spenser glanced at Robin whose eyes were fixed slightly above Spenser's head.

Robin had notice movement and his eyes had been drawn to an overhang in the cave and suddenly he realised that he was staring into the amber eyes of a large wolf. 'Shit!' he said to himself. Then not moving he glanced at Spenser, who by now had realised that something was wrong. He whispered, "Don't make any sudden movement; he's about three feet above your head. Move slowly toward…" His words were cut off by a guttural sound and to Robin's dismay the wolf sprang down on Spenser sending him sprawling.

Robin took a step towards the fallen knight but growling warned him from making any other movements. He watched in horror as saliva drooled onto Spenser's cloak. From what he could see in the dim light, the wolf was a mature animal probably a male from the size of its head. All Robin could think was, 'Spenser, don't roll over as it will go for your throat!' He slid his hand into his belt and loosened his dagger.

Spenser lay perfectly still, the wolf had its forefeet in the middle of his back, pinning him down and he could smell its fetid breath. It seemed to be mesmerised by Robin who was standing a short distance away with a dagger in his hand. Its weight was surprising nothing much more that one of Arthur's hounds, not that he had spent much time on his back with a hound on his chest. He managed while it was preoccupied with Robin to slide his hand to his belt and get the handle of his hunting knife. It had belonged to his brother and the blade was narrow and well honed. It could finish off any animal quickly.

He swung his arm backwards and slashed at the animal's flank being reward instantly with a furious howl and the next think he knew the nape of his neck was being crushed in powerful jaws…he moaned a name and passed out.

Almost simultaneously to the attack, Robin had thrown his dagger and it had entered the wolf's eye killing it on impact.

He moved over and wrenched the still twitching carcase off Spenser who was moaning. Blood was dripping from his neck down his shoulders and pooling on the ground. Robin said, "Don't move, I'll get Merlin."

Robin tried to remember how long a body could bleed before bleeding out. He was unable to think straight. He dropped his cloak and pulled off his tunic and by holding the ends of the arms swung it over and over to make a thick pillow like object. He slipped it under Spenser's neck, wrapping it around and tying it to staunch the bleeding. He knew that he would be too light headed to get up by himself and just hoped that he could reach Merlin before it was too late. As he left the cave, he ripped away some of the ivy.

It was the horses which first alerted the knights that something was amiss. They had all turned straining at their reins to look into the forest. The hounds stood up and then the men could hear someone yelling Merlin's name. Merlin followed the direction in which the horses were looking, and before Arthur's hand had become tight enough to grasp his wrist, he'd taken off.

He knew without being told that Spenser was in trouble once he had heard the fear in Robin's voice. He finally reached the young man and put his hands on his shoulders steadying him as he gasped for breath.

"Take it easy, Robin. Get your breath back and you can tell me what happened." But Robin just grabbed Merlin's arm and dragged him back along the narrow track he and Spenser had followed to the caves.

"Whenever he could he'd utter one word and finally Merlin was able to understand that a wolf had attacked Spenser. "He's dying…" Robin finally gasped. He could go no further and collapsed on the ground pointing up the path to the cliffs which Merlin could see. "Caves…my dagger stuck in tree near entrance."

Merlin took off; he had to save Spenser if only for Arthur. In no time, he was near the dark mouths of the caves and then saw Robin's dagger in one of the larger trees, and disturbed greenery. He ran as fast as he could pulling aside the ivy and bushes which allowed him to make out the prostate figure on the ground. As he eyes grew more accustomed to the light, he saw the wolf draped over Spenser's legs.

Feeling in the fallen man's neck he was able to pick up a slight pulse. He knew that his heart was still going. Unwilling to move him any more than necessary, he carefully removed the padding around back of his neck and saw the puncture wounds, one of which had been bleeding quite profusely.

Arthur was suddenly at his side. Merlin glanced at him and said, "I think he'll live. Robin did a good job with his tunic, it stemmed some of the blood flow but I don't like the position of the wound."

Romney and the huntsman were the next to come into the cave, supporting a distraught Robin who kept repeating, "I shouldn't have left him."

Arthur said, "Yes, you should have he would have likely bled to death in front of you. Did he speak to you after being bitten?"

"Not really, the only word I thought that I recognised was Simon."

Arthur just shook his head saying, "Don't worry, Merlin now has everything under control."

Merlin looked at Arthur as if he were daft. He wasn't in control, he had a man with a bad laceration on his neck which was probably going to get infected and they were miles away from any physician. The huntsman picked up the carcase and took it outside the cave. It smelt not of a fresh kill but of an obviously diseased animal. Merlin worried again about fevers. He had Gavin who had arrived with Merlin's bag of bandages and salves and Romney slightly raise Spenser's torso and placed his hand on his heart and felt its beat which seemed to be holding its own. He went to his bag and pulled out cloths and salves, "I need water."

Arthur stood up to go but Romney told him to stay that he would go to the little stream, they'd passed on the way up. Merlin handed him a small pewter bowl as Arthur said, "Merlin, how is he?"

"Well, his heart seems to be strong, and Robin's bandaging his throat stopped some of the bleeding but I don't know if he is going to be able to walk as there are lots of nerves in the neck and one or more might have been damaged. We'll need a litter."

The huntsman came in and handed Robin the knife he'd found in the wolf's flank. "It's not mine," said Robin, "Spenser managed to get the wolf in its side before it bit his neck." Arthur put his hand forward, recognising the knife as having belonged to Spenser's brother Piers and sheathed it with his.

They were interrupted by a moan. Spenser was coming round…


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER 4 :** **EYES IN COMMON**

Leaving the horses below with the huntsman and the groom, Gavin and Romney carried bedrolls back to the cave. Arthur had decided that they would stay with Spenser. Romney told their guide to return to his village to tell the people that the wolf had been killed. The man chose to wait until daylight as one wolf was dead but what if there had been more.

Merlin decided against moving Spenser so one blanket was carefully slipped under him and he was covered by Robin's cloak and another blanket. A fire had been lit in the pit and the cave was illuminated by wavering orange shadows. No one spoke. Merlin sat on the ground next to Spenser monitoring him and Gavin, passed out food from their supplies. Arthur encouraged them to eat not wasting the good food. After Merlin had used some mead to disinfect the area around the wound on Spenser's neck, Romney passed the stoneware bottle around and everyone had a sip. Trying to be positive, they discussed ways of getting Spenser down to the road. Even with the fire it was chilly in the cave, however one by one, they dozed off leaving Merlin monitoring Spenser's breathing pattern.

Robin came to from a nightmare with a start, he was seeing wolves in all the shadows and it felt so real. He got up and walked to the fire adding some brush and small branches, the brush flamed with a familiar crackling sound. He plunked himself down next to Merlin. "How's he doing?"

"He's holding his own." Spenser was moving his legs and arms and murmuring. Merlin accepted that as a good sign. He explained to Robin, "At least, he can move his extremities, hopefully that means that there is no nerve damage."

Robin took hold of one of Spenser's hands saying, "He feels nice and warm!" and he lent over and whispered, "Spenser, it's me Robin, you're going to be alright. Merlin is with you."

They both nearly jumped out of their skins when Spenser mumbled, "Simon…need you!"

Robin turned to Merlin with a big grin. "He's confused but he's talking. He's forgotten that Simon is visiting his family. He'll get better now, won't he, Merlin?"

Merlin relaxed slightly saying, "Yes, he's on the mend but not out of the woods yet!" He realised what he had said and grinned back at Robin.

"Why don't you get some rest? You've been watching him since you first came into the cave. I'll bring your bedroll over closer to Spenser and you can doze. I'll stay awake and I promise to wake you if anything changes."

Merlin nodded, he didn't intend to sleep but it would be more comfortable lying out flat as his back was sore. He lay down and stretched his back wriggling his shoulders to loosen his muscles. He kept his eyes on Spenser but the next thing he knew, someone was brushing the hair out of his eyes and he opened them to see Arthur.

"It's only early but I couldn't sleep. Why don't you get up and come outside?"

Merlin checked and Robin nodded his head, "Take a break, I'm fine, I'll snooze when you come back."

Arthur leant over holding out his hand to pull Merlin upright. Before he left the cave, Merlin went to put some more wood on the fire but Arthur stopped him. "We'll do it when we come back." He took Merlin's sleeve and dragged him out of the cave. Once outside his hand found Merlin's and he held it.

The sun was making an effort to light the sky but it only managed a couple of bands of orange and pink on the horizon.

Merlin turned to Arthur and said, "I'll be back, wait here." Arthur leant against the rock face and shivered. If Robin hadn't acted quickly, they could have been carrying a dead knight back to Camelot. He shook his head; so often Merlin was the one who went exploring for sleeping areas. He felt sick thinking that it could have been Merlin lying on the ground by the fire.

Merlin came back grinning, "I feel better. I didn't think I was ever going to stop." Arthur smiled; he'd figured that Merlin had not taken time to go outside since they'd first arrived at the cave. "What's so funny?"

"When I was little Gaius used to say, 'Go when you have to, as maybe when you want to you won't be able to!' I always remembered those words of wisdom."

Merlin stood in front of him and put his hands on the rock face on either side of Arthur's head and said quietly, "…and take every opportunity offered to tell someone that you love them."

"He didn't say that, did he?"

"Not exactly," said Merlin, "But he could have…." He leant into Arthur and gave him a kiss. Arthur responded wrapping his arms around Merlin and holding him close.

"It could have been you lying there. No more wandering off by yourself searching for private sleeping quarters and the emphasis is on private."

Merlin laughed, "No, instead I'll take you with me from the very beginning." He leant in and held Arthur's face in his hands. "You, Sire, deserve every privacy which can be afforded."

"Why is it that I feel that you have more invested in my privacy than seeing that I get a good nights sleep?"

Merlin grinned at him saying, "We should get back as I need to take over from Robin. He's a sensible soul, Spenser was lucky to be with him."

"How will we get him back to Camelot? Do you think it will be safe to move him today."

"We have to! Gaius has to see him as soon as possible. He won't be able to ride but depending on how he is we might be able to sit him on a horse and I'll hang onto him. It'll have to be one of the others as Iago is too flighty for that."

Arthur nodded remembering the fiasco when one day he had decided to ride double with Merlin. Whereas Gidun would have accepted them without a second thought and walked along quite happily, Iago had erupted as he felt Arthur's weight behind the saddle and had unceremoniously dumped both of them before cantering off happily in the direction of home. Luckily, Mulgan had accepted the two of them and Merlin had explained to the stable staff that he'd been taking a drink from a stream when Iago had run away. Arthur decided that maybe Burton would be the better horse for fooling around when they were alone.

Arthur came back to the present to hear Merlin say, "But first we have to get him down to the road. I'll need a litter and we'll carry him down there as there was only room for one horse at a time on the way up. Maybe once we're on the road, we can strap the litter between two horses. Anyway let's go back in, Robin needs to have a break."

They turned and made their way back into the cave. Robin met them, "He drew his legs up and moved his shoulders but I still think he's asleep."

Merlin said, "Good news, as at least he must have feeling in his back and legs." He walked to the fire and someone had already added wood. He crouched down beside Spenser and ran his hand over his hair, "Spenser, are you thirsty?"

Merlin was thrilled to see the knight again shift himself and move his arm toward his face.

Spenser moaned, "It hurts…Merlin?"

"Yes, it's me. You had a fall…" Spenser tried to lift his head but cried out. Merlin put his hand on his shoulders saying, "Don't move! I have some medicine to dull the pain. Let me get someone to help me." He motioned for Romney who came over immediately. "We've got to get him down to the road but right now, I want to turn him so that he can see us but I don't want his head lolling around as I do. Arthur, I need you as well."

Merlin undid the bandage and was pleased to see no bleeding. He repacked the area with fresh cloth and some salve. He retied the original support. Moving slowly but steadily, the three of them managed to turn the patient so that he was lying on his back. His neck still wrapped securely in Robin's tunic.

His eyes were tear-filled as they finally laid him down again on his bedroll but this time facing upward. "I'm sorry, to have caused all this trouble, Arthur. If you leave me here, when I feel better I'll catch you up."

"That's not going to happen, you're going to come with us…"

"I don't think I can…"

"Don't worry, we can get you down to the road on a litter and then decide if you could ride double. Just think, you can have Merlin with his arms around you the whole way home."

That made Spenser's face break into a strained smile and he said, "Promise me, you won't be jealous, Arthur?"

-0-0-

It took time but a litter was made and slowly, they got Spenser down to the road. He was still very uncomfortable when jostled and Merlin knew that the safest way to move him was on the litter hanging between two horses in tandem. They chose Romney's and Robin's horses as they were well matched gait wise and using the harness from the pack pony managed to rig up straps for transporting the litter. Two long poles were chosen, the litter would be secured between them. The fronts of the poles were attached to one horse and the ends to a horse following. The two knights would make sure that the poles remained securely attached to the stirrups with extra ties to the breeching.

To begin with Merlin walked beside Spenser but once he knew that he was safe and managing with the motion, he rode beside him. Soon they could see the turnoff to the village. Merlin wondered what the villagers had felt when they heard that the wolf was dead.

Arthur had taken one look at it and suggested that they just leave it where the huntsman had dragged it. It was mangy and scarred and the smell was offensive. He nodded at Merlin when he got him alone, "Worth keeping for the bed?"

Merlin had said seriously, "You'll be sleeping alone if you bring that thing anywhere near me!"

Arthur had sent Gavin ahead with a message for Gaius which Merlin had jotted down on a parchment giving a description of the injury. It seemed in no time that they reached the valley and they could see Camelot on the horizon.

Spenser was managing the trip very well and he and Merlin kept up a conversation. He was also moving his arms freely and when a fly landed on his face, he swatted it away, making Merlin feel more positive about the whole thing.

Arthur rode back to them and commented that it looked like a good way to travel if someone was tired. "I'd rather be riding," Spenser stated.

"You will. Give it a couple of days, you'll be up and about if Gaius agrees."

Merlin joined in, "You know, Arthur, maybe in the future this would be a way for very rich people to travel."

Arthur made a comment about it being rather narrow for two people which caused Spenser to laugh.

-0-0-

Merlin didn't really relax until Spenser was in Gaius's care. Gaius wanted to check the wound first for signs of heat and infection. Thanks to Robin's quick action staunching the blood and Merlin's follow up with first aid, the wound seemed surprisingly healthy. Gaius's poking around in it caused Spenser to flinch but it wasn't until he was completely satisfied that he covered it in honey and clean bandages. Spenser commented on the smell and Gaius explained that honey was a popular healing salve for infected wounds.

Gaius extended the bandaging down to the shoulders to give the neck the support it needed. Satisfied, he offered Spenser some water, following it up with a dose of pain killer.

Once Spenser was settled comfortably in the bed near the fire, Merlin and Gaius sat at the table nearby. "I remember an old hound, favourite of Uther who was found…that is the hound not the king," Spenser and Merlin smiled, " …found in the forest after being missing for two days, his pad had been pierced by a sharpened wooden spike used in a poacher's trap. The dog in trying to get his paw out had become entangled with the vines used in the trap and was caught. One of the gamekeepers recognised the royal collar and brought him back to the kennels. The hound could put no weight on the foot and it was rotting away. The Master of the Hunt called for me. The foot was a sorry sight but no bones seemed broken. I took a leather purse and filled it with honey, slipped the dog's foot into it and strapped it on securely. The dog was confined to a kennel, kept watered and fed. Within three days, he was standing and by the end of the week, I removed the bandage and took off the purse and the foot although still swollen and bald, was cool to the touch. It was kept bandaged and clean for another ten days and finally old Rastus was given a clean bill of health."

Merlin said, "So, Spenser, if you end up with a healthy foot growing out of your neck we'll know that the honey worked." There was no response from Spenser and Merlin turned to see him fast asleep. He involuntarily yawned.

Gaius said, "Off to bed with you, you could get in a few hours before supper. Do you want me to give you something to sleep?"

"No, I'm sure that once my head hits the pillow, I'll be out like a light."

-0-0-

Arthur returned to his chamber to find Merlin curled up in bed, dead to the world. He smiled; there was something about seeing Merlin fast asleep without a care in the world. It was almost better than during the day as he felt that Merlin trusted him completely. He could still get the scent of the wolf in his nostrils and stripped off all his clothes for the second time that day. He decided to get dressed by himself and quietly got his things together, Thomas could give him the once over before he left his chambers for the dining hall. As he went to leave the room, he walked back to look once more at Merlin, his nose was turned into the pillow and his eyelashes lay dark against his pale skin. He had pulled the feathered comforter up around his ears. Arthur was tempted to join him but then realised that that would certainly disturb him and he needed to dine with the knights…so he left.

_Merlin turned over. The wolf had its fangs into the neck of its intended victim and was shaking it unmercifully. He tried to get its attention but it was so intent on what it was doing that even a well aimed stone made little impact on it. Holding his knife in front of him, he assumed a crouched position and screamed like a banshee. That got the animal's attention and its jaw left the neck as its yellow eyes took in the man crouched before it. Merlin knew that a four legged creature could leap further than he could from his crouched position but all he had wanted to do was to get the animal to let go of Arthur._

_From his position he was conscious of not only the huge paws and the long legs but the strength in the jaw and its blood covered teeth and lips._

_It had been his idea to take cover in this cave, it had seemed perfect. It was deep and they were able to get out of the icy wind and pouring rain. Dusk had come quicker than expected and they had decided to spend the night meeting up with the others in the morning. He still didn't know what had happened but suddenly he realised that they were not alone. He felt the hair at the base of his neck rise and he unconsciously growled._

_A silver figure had flown through the air landing on Arthur's chest knocking him to the ground. It happened in a split instant and the wolf sank its canines into Arthur's neck. Merlin could see the surprise and annoyance in Arthur's eyes but then they clouded over as he sank to the ground._

_Merlin felt his magic come to the surface as he faced Arthur's killer. He slowly stood keeping the wolf mesmerised by his own golden eyes. Two sets of yellow eyes stared at each other and Merlin said, "Veni!" The wolf obediently stepped forward to meet Merlin's knife, crumbling to the ground twitching in its death throes. Merlin looked at it mentally apologising for killing an animal which was acting the way nature had ordained._

_He turned and with his head down walked to Arthur's body…his body was wracked with tears. He accepted full blame for this awful outcome and he fell to his knees. He raised his head and howled…_

He felt strong arms holding him and he let himself sink into oblivion. He came to in bed with a worried face looking at him in the candlelight. "Are you all right? God, Merlin! Talk about scaring someone to death you sounded like an infuriated wolf. What on earth were you dreaming about?"

"You!" Merlin whispered as a tear slid down his cheek.

"Hey, don't cry! We're safe and sound…come here." Merlin slid into Arthur's arms and finally fell asleep wondering if he had opened his eyes during the nightmare and if they had been golden.


	5. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER 5 : IF NOT ME WHO?**

Arthur slipped out of bed before Merlin. He looked out the window and was pleased to see that the weather had still held. If this went as planned, they would leave midweek for a few days hunting. He walked to the fire and added a couple of small logs.

Merlin stirred but didn't open his eyes. He hadn't really settled deeply after his nightmare. Arthur was sure that they had something to do with his over-active imagination but they were real to Merlin and very frightening; however last nights was not only the thrashing kind but also a vocalising one. Arthur realised if he had been alone in the bedchamber and hadn't known who was making the noise, he would have been worried. He shivered; it had been primal, a sound equated with ancestors before speech. He shook his head; chances that Merlin would enlighten him on the reason for the nightmare were slim. Usually the more upsetting they were, the more reticent he became about sharing.

Glancing back at him, Arthur realised that he was being watched. He walked to the edge of the bed kneeling on it and ran his fingers through Merlin's hair. "You all right?"

Merlin stretches luxuriously saying, "I might be if you come back to bed."

Arthur knew that there would be no discussing the nightmare today. "Sorry, I can't, I have to see Gaius before I go to the meeting regarding the problems near Stonefield. I'm hoping to get good news about Spenser. Sir Rodney and Lady Jayne must have spent a worrying night. Anyway, I heard Thomas bringing in the breakfast platters so if you get yourself out of bed to tend to the coppers, I'll bring in the breakfast. Even just being in the cave with that wolf has left its scent in my nose."

Merlin got the bath ready and removed any clothing from the bedchamber that had possibly come in contact with the wolf or any clothes which Arthur and he had subsequently worn. He thought the smell was in Arthur's mind but the outdoor clothes would all benefit from a good brushing and being hung up in the breeze. At least, he wouldn't have to do it. He stripped the bed, bundling night clothes, smalls and under tunics in the bed sheets so they could be taken to the laundry. He put some lavender into the bath water and waited for Arthur to finish breakfast and get into the bath.

"Smells good in here," Arthur commented. He lay back in the water and closed his eyes. Merlin meantime, had remade the bed and laid Arthur's clothes for the day on it. He wandered back into the water closet saying, "Arthur, enough! If you stay in there any longer you'll look like a prune."

"Just until the water gets cool, it's lovely. You should join me."

Merlin with a blink of his eyes started the water to cool at an exaggerated pace. "Not right now, you have a meeting coming up. I'll bathe later."

"Make sure you do as I think maybe you are one of the sources of the smell in my nose."

"Can't save knights and always come up smelling of roses, can I, Arthur?"

Arthur suddenly shivered, "No I guess not and thank you for looking after Spenser…" He stood up and Merlin handed him a bath sheet. "I'll dry off in front of the fire."

Merlin let the cold water drain out of the bath and refilled the coppers, the water almost at the right temperature immediately. He smiled to himself.

Sitting on the bed, he waited while Arthur dried himself. "Need help?" he asked innocently. Arthur smiled and shook his head. Merlin continued, "Are you planning to go up to Stonefield or wait until you get reports?"

"No, I think I have enough to do planning the hunting trip." Merlin stood to help Arthur with his clothes as he said, "Surely four of Camelot's finest and ten armed men are capable of settling any unrest. It's probably just the same trouble makers as last time. Maybe with winter coming they've decided to attack and take supplies. However, if things aren't settled, it might be worth making a trip up there. But not now, hunting is first and foremost as we can augment the supply of meat in the castle and enjoy ourselves as well."

Merlin raised his eyes to heaven muttering, "_You_ can enjoy yourself…"

"I heard that! After all these years haven't you even just the slightest thrill when hunting?"

"I do enjoy the woods and the camping but spending hours tracking deer which could have been just as easily killed by the huntsmen leaves me cold and yet, I have to go."

"Why?"

"Well, to be with you, of course."

Merlin found himself flat on the bed as Arthur had sprung at him saying, "Tell me what you like about hunting?"

"I like the woods in the early morning and at dusk, I like lying beside you at the campfire, I like listening to you get all excited when you retell of getting the deer with a clean kill. I love that look on your face which says, 'This one's for you, Merlin!' when you turn to me after making a kill. I like following you into the woods and pretending that you are leading me to a lovers' rendezvous. I like seeing your hair shining in the sun and your muscles rippling as you lift your cross bow…"

Arthur leant down and kissed Merlin's nose, then his lips and finally pulled him upright again. "I promise you this time it will be different. We will have our own space. I will find time to spend with you."

"No, Arthur, that wouldn't be right, you are there to hunt. It is not a holiday…but as we're talking about time spent together. I would love for the two of us to return to the seaside."

"With Treva?"

Merlin smiled guiltily as he said, "No, Arthur just you and me. No servants no knights, just us."

"I'd like that too…just us and the waves and the gulls."

"It would be like running away from all the responsibilities of the kingdom…"

"And that…" Arthur said seriously, "Is one of the reasons why we can't do it. My place is here. Last time, my father was still alive."

Merlin's face fell to be suddenly uplifted with a wide grin, "I have a really brilliant idea!"

Arthur cringed because although many ideas of Merlin were excellent, if he prefaced it with the word brilliant, it was usually beyond reach. "Can it wait until later?" he said.

"Yes! It will give me even more time to work on it. Arthur, it will blow your mind away and I can't understand why I haven't come up with it before."

"Well, hold that thought. Now get ready, I'll nip down to see Gaius and meet you in the council chamber to see what news has come from Stonefield."

-0-0-

Merlin smiled; he'd have a few minutes to think all by himself a luxury not to be scorned. He allowed the water to fill the tub and threw in some lavender and a little dried bergamot then decided to add a little honey. He stripped adding his clothes to the pile in the sheets. He shivered, the room was chilly. He slipped on his shoes making his way to the fire to add a few more logs. He'd follow Arthur's example and dry off in front of the fire. He toed off his shoes and slipped into the bath. The warm water felt wonderful on his skin. The soothing smell of the lavender and the citrus-like scent of the bergamot filled the air. He let himself slip down until his chin was touching the water. His plans to give himself a good scrub with a rough cloth were put on hold as his eyes began to close…he came to as the water cooled and whispered, "_Da mihi, aqua calida!"_

He smiled to himself and said, "Life is good!" He half thought about sitting up and getting washed but as he moved, his shoulders hit the cold air and he scooted back down again. He let his mind return to the brilliant idea he had about the seaside. It would work, so maybe it might cost a little money but after all the kingdom could afford it and the Council could hardly deprive their king. He decided to talk to Geoffrey and run the idea by him, the two of them got along well and if the example of Yewdene reflected Geoffrey's interest in the two of them he felt quite positive that his plan might come to fruition.

He hummed happily to himself all thoughts of Arthur and his meeting out of his mind. He came to suddenly realising that he was not alone. If this wasn't Arthur, he really didn't know what he would do? His eyes flashed open and Arthur was kneeling by the tub with his arm in the water smiling at him. Merlin relaxed.

Arthur grinned, "The meeting's over. Do you want company?"

"Did you bar the door?" Arthur nodded. "Well, I wouldn't be adverse to a little company but watch out as the bath is full and knowing you, there'll be water everywhere. Leave your clothes on the bed or they'll get wet."

Arthur slipped off the clothes which he had only recently put on and returned to the water closet. "See, Merlin, it will be great once the hunting is finished for the day, you will be able to fill the tub and I will be able to soak and you can feed me my supper."

"Don't hold your breath!" Merlin said quietly, then came up spluttering, "Arthur, what was that about?"

"Well, you said, 'I'm going to hold my breath' and I thought you wanted to get dunked."

Merlin looked at him and shook his head. Arthur grinned and said, "I'm getting cold here. Scooch over I'm coming in."

Water cascaded out of the tub onto the flagstones.

"Arthur, if you drown me, I'll never speak to you again!"

-0-0-

They actually didn't get down to see Gaius and Spenser until just before lunch. Spenser was lying back against rolled up blankets and a pillow. He had more colour in his face and looked one hundred percent better than the previous day. He grinned at Merlin saying, "I believe I have you to thank for getting me back home in one piece."

Merlin nodded saying, "What do you remember?"

"Not much. Robin and I were in a cave and Robin's eyes flicked up as if he were going to have a fit and then he said, 'Don't move!' and the next thing it felt like a ton of bricks had hit me mid-back and I fell face down. Actually the weight on my back wasn't too bad but when it started biting my neck I was able to get Piers' knife and by twisting stabbed it but that enraged it and it bit my neck shaking it…I then blanked out. Next thing I remember you were talking to me. Everything is sort of confused, I remember the litter and being in pain as the horses moved but then nothing until I woke up with Gaius…and the smell. It was gross!"

"See, Merlin, I told you we needed to have baths to get rid of the smell."

Spenser glanced at Merlin and realised there was more background to that story. He grinned at Merlin who ducked his head and smiled.

Gaius wandered over and Arthur said, "When can we expect him up and about?"

"I want to get the wound healed first but he has feeling in his legs and down his spine so in no time he should be up but nothing strenuous until after Yuletide." He turned to Spenser saying, "Does that suit you, young man?"

Gaius had been his physician since he was born and he was quite happy to follow the elderly man's suggestions where his health was concerned. "But that means I'll miss the inauguration of the new hunting lodge…"

"Don't worry!" said Merlin, "I'll make sure that Arthur leaves a couple of rabbits for you to take the next time we're up there. Simon isn't due back until next week, so he will also be missing it so you and he will be able to go there together. Right, Arthur?" Merlin had glanced at him to see the gleam in Spenser's eyes but with Arthur's next words it had disappeared.

"Honestly, Merlin, sometimes I wonder where your head is. Spenser doesn't want to go only with Simon. He'll want the rest of the group won't you?"

Spenser's response was fractionally delayed when he answered, "True, Arthur!"

"Anyway," said Gaius, "Off you go the two of you. My patient is due for more medication and then his lunch, followed by a nap. Sleep is a great healer."

Saying their goodbyes, Arthur and Merlin left the room. "He seems so much better, I was worried that we were going to lose him and have nothing to show for it not even the wolf pelt."

"Arthur, do you know how hard-hearted that sounded?"

"You know what I meant."

"Well, I hope that if I die, you won't seem so insensitive."

"Merlin, don't say that! I think I die a little every time you are injured. My life comes grinding to a stop; I am too scared to breathe and worried out of my mind."

"I should hope so…nothing more than the way I feel when you do something silly and get wounded."

"Getting wounded, Merlin, is not silly."

"It is if you go out purposely courting trouble."

"All right! Then the next time enemies come knocking on the castle door, I'll ask your permission to take all my knights out to fight them?"

"Would you, Arthur? Would you'd really ask me first?"

"No!"

"Didn't think so… I'm hungry." Merlin took off running up the stairs two at a time. "Bet you that Thomas already has the meal on the table."

Arthur stood there shaking his head and then followed him.

-0-0-

The following afternoon, Arthur was pleased to receive a message that the party from Stonefield had returned. He asked to see Sir Gavin immediately.

Gavin arrived, with a grin on his face, "Arthur, once the word got out that we were in the area, all problems ceased. It was trouble with a village in the neighbouring valley which hadn't done well with harvests this summer. They were panicked by the arrival of the colder weather. Stonefield had done well and some enterprising men had decided to raid their supply barns and of course, fighting and injuries had ensued. I sent Sirs Bryn and Nigel with some guards and brought the trouble makers back to Stonefield.

With Stonefield's bumper harvest, I managed to send a wagon with fifteen sacks of grain to Hillso'er but I would recommend that more grain be sent from Camelot."

"How did you ever persuade the villagers to part with some of their crops?"

"A little silver speaks wonders and I promised them supplies would be replaced when the wagons came from Camelot."

"Quick thinking. Our reckoning of supplies is really high and we can afford to send some up there. I'll see Bryn, Nigel, Brendan and you tomorrow. See that the guards are thanked and ask that a list be drawn up of suitable men to accompany the supply wagons. How bad were the injuries?"

"A lot of hurt feelings and a few broken heads. Hate to see people worried about food. Hillso'er barely subsists each year. It might be worthwhile considering relocating a few families, maybe even abandoning the village."

"Bring that up tomorrow but first check distances from the boundary with our neighbours to the east. Also we have the hunting expedition set for day after tomorrow. You're welcome to participate."

Gavin nodded and then bowed and left the king's presence. Merlin was grinning, he had fond memories of Gavin as a squire, fond but not painless.

"Remembering the boot in the face?" Arthur said.

Merlin said, "Yes, but it wasn't intentional and he's a great knight so maybe the shock and pain were worth it." Following a fatal excursion, with squires, Merlin had found Gavin caught on a river bank, upside down held by roots of a nearby tree. He had managed to extricate first one foot and then in doing the same to the other, the boot had come flying out of the hole hitting Merlin right in the noggin. Gavin had felt awful especially as for the next few days Merlin sprouted a colourful bruise.

However, that outing had not been without sorrow as the young squire Daffyd who as a young page had helped Merlin learn the layout of the castle, had died in his arms. He was the brother of Sir Rodik who had not been on the patrol. Arthur glanced at Merlin, it had been the futility of the whole thing as that day they had lost a knight and three squires.

Arthur could still see Gavin walking with the Squire Master behind the bodies of his three friends as they made their way to the cemetery. He also remembered his father's questioning glance as he had chosen to follow the procession.

"Arthur, you're miles away…it's all in the past."

"Just remembering my father's contempt…contempt that I would have considered following a knight's and three squires' bodies to their burial spot. He had said, 'It's their duty to die for you…for heaven's sake act like a future King!' I don't know why his words upset me as I should have been used to his contempt."

Merlin walked forward and stood behind Arthur's chair, slipping his arms around Arthur's neck he sighed. Parental guidance is only as good as the morals upon which it is based. Uther had been lacking in that quality. Arthur's life had been torturous where his father was concerned; many times he second guessed his own actions if they seemed to contradict what his father had unfortunately tried to impress upon him. Merlin touched his lips to the back of Arthur's neck and whispered, "You were right; you know…your place was with the mourners. It was criminal what happened and your support helped many people through a rough time." Parents saying things without thinking, often didn't realise the effect they had on their children. However, Merlin couldn't give Uther the benefit of the doubt, he knew exactly what he had been thinking. He shuddered…

"You cold?" asked Arthur.

"No, just a shiver running through me. I'll put some more wood on the fire, it gets cold in the late afternoon. Anyway, we're eating up here, aren't we?"

"Yes, but it's only Leon and Gawaine, we can cancel if you'd prefer to have me to yourself."

"…and whatever would give you that idea?" Merlin glanced at Arthur, "Having been with you all day, it'd be a relief to see someone else's face."

"We'll see about that later tonight," Arthur said laughing. He patted the space beside him and Merlin sat down, leaning comfortably into his side. "I bet I know whom you would like to be with if I weren't around."

Merlin slid his hand around Arthur's waist, managing to slip it under his tunic and place it over his heart. Arthur shifted perceptively. "You know, that would be a hard choice. So many handsome men, all willing to do my heart's desire…it would be very difficult. Some are tall, some are shorter. Some are very handsome and others it is their kindness and sensibility which first attracts you. Some are very brave, foolhardy almost while others bide their time but are staunch defenders of their brother knights."

"Merlin, I didn't say it could be a knight!"

"Well, then that really reduces the playing field. Maybe a squire?"

"No!"

"All right, then I would like a young lady who is pleasant to be around and trustworthy and I'm sure we would get along fine."

Merlin felt Arthur chuckling as he said," Lot of good that would do you…"

"However," Merlin continued, "I think that the task is beyond me. How could I ever settle on anyone else after you? I'd have my position to uphold, best friend and lover of the king. No…I can't really think of anyone who would appeal to me. I'd just sit in the library alone or take long rides in solitude. I'd keep our chamber dust free and your armour well polished and hope that one day; you would again grace my presence."

Arthur laughed, "Merlin, there will never be anyone else but you. You complement all my abilities and reflect my wondrous ways."

Merlin suddenly attacked Arthur's side with a well aimed pinch. Arthur started laughing and the two of them were rolling around on the bench when they heard a tap on the door. Arthur said, "Come in!" adding quietly, "Merlin, a young lady really? Have I been wasting my time with you?"


	6. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER 6 : LOCATION, LOCATION, LOCATION**

Mid week arrived and preparations for the hunt were well in hand. A supply wagon had left the previous morning with staff, so that the lodge would be warm and prepared when the king and his party of ten knights and four squires arrived. Huntsmen and grooms augmented the numbers. Leon as senior knight had agreed to stay behind with Gielbert to watch over the remaining knights.

The original plan had been to locate the lodge within an easy ride of Camelot so that it could be used by the ladies of the court for picnics. However, some negative although hilarious comments among the knights had seen it relocated to an area rich in wildlife but further afield than originally planned. If a rider on a good horse left at dawn in good summer weather, he should be able to reach the lodge by dusk of the same day. Whenever possible the Roman roads would be used but in no time, they would have to be abandoned for rough trails. The workman had at one point kept the tracks open but they would revert to unkempt trails. Arthur hoped that the woods would fulfil the promises of the Master of the Hunt and his staff who after they had surveyed the surrounding forest and grassland, reported that game was abundant on the land.

Scattered over the kingdom there were various hunting lodges, some no more than abandoned ruins as the woods had been over hunted and it would take time for rebuilding the deer and boar populations. Rulers and the hunting staff understood that hunting depended upon a quarry so gamekeepers kept a watch on the king's reserves. Only the king, his knights, guests and staff if given a command, were permitted to hunt in these areas.

Peasants were allowed to hunt on common ground. The royal reserves were off limit to the local population. Poachers were abundant as seeing a deer you are hunting, leave common land for the protection of a forest visited by the ruling class for only two weeks every three years was too much of a temptation when there was a hungry family at home. Getting caught was disastrous as poaching was a serious offence.

-0-0-

The plan this time was to leave around midday, spent one night sleeping rough and they proceed to the lodge the following day. The schedule would be governed by the condition of the trails and the weather. They should be able to travel thirty miles per day on level roads dropping back to fifteen to ten miles depending on the terrain. The plan was to spend two or three days hunting depending on the weather and the availability of game.

Arthur was looking forward to the change of scenery. He had chosen knights who were compatible. As Spenser, Simon and Leon wold not be with him, he had added three younger knights who deserved recognition of their hard work. Gawaine, Romney, Aislin, Robin, Gavin, Rook and Rawn, would be joined by Sir Phillip of Trent, Sir Nathan of Ewell and Sir Nigel of Rohallion brother of James.

He leaned back in his chair; all the council work had been completed. Merlin had gone off to see Spenser who was progressing well . He allowed himself the luxury of daydreaming. The supply wagon once filled with game could return to Camelot. If all the packhorses were carrying their maximum load some of the knights' and or squires' horses would also have to carry carcases. He smiled to himself remembering Gaius's warning about counting his chickens before they hatched. However, this was different, they would have a successful hunt, enjoy themselves and help fill the castle's meat safes for the winter.

He'd check up that Merlin was dressed suitably for the colder weather. 'Nothing worse than a cold manservant…' he thought. He smiled imagining Merlin's indignant look when he realised that he Arthur was checking up on what he was wearing. He could almost hear him say, 'I've been looking after you long enough to know what I should be wearing against the cold.'

Arthur grinned thinking, 'Well, make sure you do, we're not taking warming pans and if the rest of you is as cold as your feet sometimes are, it will be like sleeping with a block of ice.'

-0-0-.

Gaius as usual took time to go through with Merlin the first aid kit he had prepared. "No wolves, this time!" he had joked.

"I hope not or any boar attacks. Maybe just some nettles, poisonous mushrooms, sprained ankles and arrow injuries, you know the general run of the mill occurrences when people go out in the woods."

Gaius smiled, "Have a good time and remember keep on eye on Arthur he can sometimes get a bit carried away when he is hunting. Hope the weather stays clear but at least you have good accommodation. Humphrey was telling me all about the place as he'd gone out to visit it last week."

Merlin picked up the bag of medical supplies and left calling over his shoulder, "…and I won't forget that you are rather partial to rabbit."

Bounding up the stairs, Merlin reached their chambers and burst in. Arthur was sitting at the table, Merlin grinned at him saying, "If you have nothing to do, you could have been checking that you have everything you will need in your saddle bags." He put the bag from Gaius near his things.

Arthur said, "Are you going to be suitably dressed for the weather? Nothing worse than a cold manservant…"

Merlin's indignant look was accompanied by a huff as he realised that Arthur was checking up on what he was going to wear. To Arthur's delight, Merlin said, "I've been looking after you long enough to know what I should be wearing against the cold."

Arthur mentally patted himself on the back for knowing Merlin so well and he grinned saying, "Well, make sure you do, we're not taking warming pans and if the rest of you is as cold as your feet sometimes are, it will be as if I am sleeping with a block of ice."

-0-0-

The ride out to the location of the new lodge area was perfect. The weather had cooperated and everyone was in fine fettle. It was what Merlin had felt that a school outing might have been like. Gawaine was in fine form recalling the boar which he had killed the previous autumn. To which Arthur had remarked that he had almost killing himself in the bargain. Gawaine laughed saying, "As long as Merlin is near me that is one thing I don't have to fear."

Aislin said, "And if he isn't?"

"Curtains," said Gawaine with a theatrical sob.

Arthur grinned at Merlin, "Nice to see that your presence brings positive reaction from my knights." He winked, "However, you are here primarily at my beck and call."

"Ooh!" said Gawaine, "The master speaks…" Arthur and the others started to laugh.

After crossing a river, they pulled off the trail for a break for both riders and horses. One of the squires handed out food. His name was Royon and he had an identical twin brother called Rostin. They were in their last but one year before being invested and two of the four chosen by the squire master to accompany the royal party. As this was the inauguration of the lodge, there was a certain amount of formality as most times the hunting party besides hunting staff and grooms consisted only of the king and a handful of knights.

The first night out they camped in an abandoned village. No one was sure of the history of the place but a couple of the buildings offered minimal protection which was better than waking to a layer of heavy frost on your blanket. Merlin felt a little worried about the place. He wouldn't have been able to put his finger on what it was but given the choice, he would have preferred to be sleeping in the open.

Arthur had pooh-poohed the idea and insisted that they stay there particularly as it was chilly and a little scotch mist was falling. "You'll get wet, then you'll get a cold and I am the one who will have to put up with your wheezing, coughing and snuffling!"

"Love you too!" Merlin said cheekily but Arthur refrained from answering him.

The knights had divided into groups but Gawaine and Romney had remained with Arthur. Gawaine said, "I have a feeling that this must have been an inn or an alehouse as it obviously had two storeys. I bet if it could talk it could tell a tale or two."

Romney and Arthur had laughed as the former said, "Well, you would certainly be the one with the most knowledge about alehouses."

"I'll have you know, that there is more to my life that drinking!"

Merlin's voice was heard to say, "…and wenching! Isn't it time that you followed Romney's example and found a nice woman and settled down."

"Maybe," said Arthur raising his eyebrows questioningly, "I could mention it at the next council meeting that someone should consider finding a suitable lady for you, Gawaine."

"Arthur, I assure you the problem is not with finding one suitable lady but finding so many that I can't make a decision which one I want to be with on a permanent basis."

Romney said, "When you find the right one, all the others will fade into the background. I knew within days of meeting Mattie that she was the one and only one for me."

Merlin nodded, Mattie or the Lady Mathilda was the daughter of Sir Rupert of Sloane and Lady Alisse. Romney and her certainly looked like a match made in heaven. They were very happy and had a young son Rupert. Merlin glanced at Arthur, he had known that Arthur was the person he wanted to be with but it had taken a while to get it all sorted out.

Arthur looked at Merlin asking, "What are you grinning about?"

"Just remembering…" he said and cast his eyes down. The memories of those early day were of highs and lows, plans for the future clouded by second guessing himself and doubts but the feeling had been so strong that he had turned to Gaius who hadn't run out of the room screaming but had sat down and calmly explained to Merlin all about human sexuality.

Arthur didn't push it as he had his own memories and they also included the kindness and understanding of a certain court physician.

-0-0-

Merlin lit a fire in what had one day been a large hearth but although the chimney was gone it afforded some heat, the smoke swirling around finding its own way out. They pulled their sleeping rolls as close to the fire as was safe and drifted off.

_Merlin sits in Gaius's chambers, in front of a hearth which closely resembled the one in which he had just placed fuel. He tells Gaius that he has found himself drawn to Arthur but in a way which he had never felt about anyone. "It scares me to look at him in case he sees the feeling in my eyes. Sometimes, I just want to hug him and it frightens me that one day the feeling will become so strong that I won't be able to stop myself."_

_Gaius is kind; he listens patiently. It helps and Merlin feels he can better cope with the feelings. But Arthur is making life difficult, he's watching Merlin, sometimes shyly smiling at him and as far as Merlin is concerned he has become not only more handsome but more desirable. He feels that Arthur is less standoffish especially when he's helping him with armour and the like. Not that Arthur crowds him but he stands closer to him these days than he did when he had first taken the position of royal manservant._

_He reverts to keeping his eyes closed whenever Arthur bathes or needs help with bath sheets and soaps. Arthur's habit of walking around the chamber in only his trousers or his nightshirt becomes very difficult, making Merlin happy to escape to his little room off Gaius's chambers where he lies, unable to sleep with all sorts of things running through his mind. _

_He knows that Arthur will have to make the first move but he has been waiting so long… There was a hunting trip, a rain storm and a tiny cave and he had made a decision. Gawaine, Arthur and he are separated from the other knights and squeeze into the little cave out of the rain. He pretends to sleep and makes the first little move and waits for either a punch in the face or being ignored._

_He confides in Gaius later how he had, after complaining of the cold managed to secure a place between Gawaine and Arthur and how pretending to be asleep he had placed his hand carefully on Arthur's chest and held his breath. He knew that Arthur was not asleep by the rhythm of his breathing. Arthur had neither shoved his hand away nor turned over. He had remained still and Merlin had allowed his finger to make minute circles on his chest enjoying the contact with Arthur's person._

_Suddenly, he feels a smack across the head, hard enough to throw him to the ground. He looks up in astonishment and realises that Gaius has become Uther. The king drags him upright by his ears and marches him to the council chamber. He throws him on the floor in the corner and instructs the guards to find the crown prince. _

_Merlin's head is ringing and his arm hurts where he landed on it. 'Gaius needs to see it,' he thinks._

_He sees Arthur walking in and hears the king tell him that he disgusts him. Merlin thinks, 'Protect yourself, Arthur, don't let on!'_

_Uther insists that punishment needs to be metered out and decides that both parties will be punished. Merlin listens as Uther says that he would be killed and Arthur will do it._

_Gaius comes to him as he lies in the dungeon and slips him a vial of medication, "I can only stay with you until the guards come but when we hear them, drink the contents. It will help. Trust Arthur, he won't make you suffer unnecessarily."_

"_You'll look after him, Gaius, won't you? If he asks, tell him that I really did love him."_

_It is sunny and warm as the guards lead Merlin to the training field. He is tied to the quintain and he knows when silence falls that Arthur is approaching. In his semi drugged mind, Merlin sees Arthur as a god on a fiery stallion. He hears Mulgan's trot turn to a canter as Arthur draws nearer. He raises his head and smiles at his executioner, Arthur falters but the lance does its work and Merlin feels a freezing cold, stabbing pain in his chest. He looks up at Arthur and sees tears streaming down the prince's face…and he screams._

He heard a faraway voice saying, "Merlin Love, come on wake up! You'll have all the knights in here in a minute."

Gawaine called over, "Arthur, is he all right? Do you need any help?

"No! He'll soon wake up and snap put of it." He leant over Merlin who was shuddering, his eyes still sealed and a look of anguish on his face.

His throat felt raw, his ears were ringing as he pleaded, "Make it fast, Arthur!" He kept mumbling, "Don't miss!"

"Merlin, it's me. Wake up!" He rubbed Merlin's cheek and then his hands which were freezing cold.

Bleary eyed, Merlin gazed up at him, "You didn't do it. Oh, Arthur, your father will exact a more severe punishment!"

"Merlin, my father is dead, I'm the king. There will be no punishment. Come on, move closer to me and tell me what I didn't do."

Merlin moved closer to him and remembering everything slowly and clearly told Arthur what he had dreamed. "You didn't have a choice and you looked so handsome and Mulgan seemed made of flames and it didn't really hurt."

Arthur cradled him in his arms and said, "Nothing you could ever do would cause me to refuse to forgive you and as to running you through with a lance that is unlikely to happen." He smiled holding him a little closer as he said, "That is…unless you got between me and an eighteen point stag and then I would have to reconsider. Now, come along we still have a few hours before daylight. Get some sleep and leave me to deal with your monsters…"

-0-0-

Merlin woke to the sound of voices through the door and the smell of porridge. He opened his eyes he was still lying by the fire. The contents of the dream flashed through his mind but now that everyone was up and the sun was shining, the horror of it faded away. He smiled to himself his Mam had always told him that a problem shared was a problem halved. He was embarrassed as Arthur must think him a real twit.

A voice said quietly from the door, "Good morning, Sleeping Beauty! Ready to start a new day? Breakfast is soon to be served and people are noticing your absence. I said that you were having a lie in and I'm sure that I distinctly heard Gawaine say '…and all alone, what a shame!'

Merlin grinned, "Give me a minute and I'll join you." Merlin got up gathered the sleeping rolls to place near the door and went out to join the others.


	7. Chapter 7

**CHAPTER 7 : THE FURNITURE MOVERS**

Merlin had seen all the plans and had made one trip to the new hunting lodge when the log foundation was built on a base of huge boulders. It was above the flood line of the nearby river but Arthur had insisted on a solid foundation. The walls were planks of mature trees and he had also insisted on extra windows to brighten the place. When vacant the lodge windows would be heavily shuttered. A lean-to across the back provided rough stabling for horses. Merlin knew that the Master Woodcarver had included a surprise in the finished building but it was to the best of his knowledge, a secret from Arthur.

They came up a slight knoll and surrounded by trees in a small clearing was the south facing lodge. Merlin marvelled as it looked as though it had been there for years. It had a settled look and the unfinished wood, blended nicely with the leafless trees. The knights dismounted handing horses to the grooms and squires then waited while Arthur walked the perimeter prior to walking up the four steps into the building.

Gawaine smiled at him giving Merlin a slight push so that he was the second person in and then all the knights followed. There was a collective drawing in of breath as they took in the huge stone hearth with its welcoming fire. The mantelpiece above held in place of honour, a bas-relief silhouette of the Pendragon emblem. Arthur turned, "Did anyone know about this?" The knights all shook their heads. "Well, it is quite appropriate and Dunnald has done an excellent job." It was to become a custom to toast the dragon, whenever meals were taking in the lodge.

The knights then explored their new accommodations. Three quarters of the main floor was devoted to communal space. Gawaine before he went anywhere said, "I bags a room in the gallery. From there I will be able to look down and check everything out."

"I think you're going to be disappointed as the two gallery chambers sleep five people each. Won't be much privacy," Rook called from upstairs.

"When I'm hunting I don't require much privacy just a comfortable cot and a warm room."

The squires were brining in the bedrolls and had them piled in the middle of the large central chamber. Merlin stepped forward and picked up Arthur's and his. His eyes were wandering to the south eastern corner of the lodge where he knew the king's chamber was.

Arthur said, "Well, Men, decide where you are going to sleep. Squires take one of the back rooms it should be big enough for the four of you. Merlin, put my stuff in my chamber and then let's have some ale, I think we should toast our arrival here." A couple of servants disappeared returning with a barrel of ale.

"I like this place better every minute I'm here," Gawaine confided to Merlin as he walked by with the sleeping bags.

Merlin went into the chamber situated behind the hearth giving extra warmth to the room. It had a window, two cots and a rough set of shelves with some blankets and pillows. The first thing he intended to do was the move the cots beside each other. He noticed a large burlap sack on the floor in the corner and opening it was happy to find rolled up a good sized mattress. He smiled thinking that Thomas had been one step ahead of him. He smiled again to himself and put a bedroll on each bed leaving them as they were. The water closet was basic, a primitive pump, a metal trough like basin and a chamber pot. There was also a drain but before Merlin poured anything down it he wanted to check where it emptied, nothing worse, than sloshing through a soaking patch of ground as you approached the lodge. He felt however that the builders would have taken more care than that.

The door opened behind him. "What have you been doing? The others are already drinking." Arthur walked in and looked at the cots, "Well, that isn't going to work is it?"

"Yes, it will be fine. I thought you could have the one near the wall as the stones from the back of hearth will keep you warm and I'll sleep in the cot near the window." The look on Arthur's face was worth admission and Merlin was unable to keep a straight face and he burst out laughing.

"It's not funny, Merlin, I'm not sleeping by myself. I though Thomas would have taken care of this…"

"Arthur, relax he did. I'll need a hand but I can fix it." He said half seriously, "Shall I get one of the squires to help move the cots? You can go back to your drinking."

Arthur raised his eyebrows, "I do not think that we need to ask young impressionable squires to join two cots together to make one bed! I'll send Gawaine…" Arthur turned grinning and made his way back into the main chamber.

Within minutes, Gawaine with a mug of ale came into the room saying, "Arthur said that you needed help. What have you done this time, Merlin?"

"Nothing…I need you to help me move these cots so that they make one bed."

"I wonder why?" said Gawaine eyeing Merlin up and down.

Blushing, Merlin said, "Stop that, just give me a hand."

Gawaine's eyebrows raised as he said, "I never thought you'd ask."

Laughing, Merlin threw the bedroll which he had just taken off one of the cots at him. "They're quite solid but there is a large mattress to fit them once they are side by side." With a minimum of lifting and some shoving, they managed to get the cots lined up. Merlin got the large mattress and placed it over the two straw filled ones that covered the cots. He then added one of the heavy woollen blankets from the shelf, the pillows and on top their bedrolls.

Gawaine then sat on the bed to see how comfortable it would be. "The height of luxury!" he stated, "But, that's enough work now let's get back to more important things like eating and drinking."

Merlin gave one last look around the small chamber and followed him out into the main room.

-0-0-

It felt like home having the meal prepared by two members of the kitchen staff and served by the squires. The tables in the main room were heavy oak capable of seating eight each and surrounded by benches. To fit the space, there were placed in an 'L'. The meal was excellent so unlike what was usually served out hunting. Once it was served, Merlin told the squires to leave the pitchers of ale handy as the knights would help themselves. "If we need anymore, I'll notify you. Now go and get yourselves something to eat."

The lodge was warm and after the good meal and some exceptionally good ale, the majority of knights were ready for bed. Arthur said, "Tomorrow, we'll go out in smaller groups to get the lay of the land. So keep your wits about you. We're after deer and boar not brother knights." He stood amid their laughter and made his way to his chamber.

The others had already decided where they were going to sleep and most dispersed to their chosen chambers. The squires cleared the tables but Gawaine nodded for the squire to top up his mug and Aislin, Rook and Gavin followed his lead. They sat around for another hour talking quietly and then left, leaving one tired squire to collect up the mugs and another to check on the fire. It would be their duty to keep it burning all night. There was plenty of wood stacked in the corner so they didn't have to go out searching for suitably sized branches in the dark. "I'll take first watch, "said Ritson, "And hope I don't fall asleep, I was ready for my cot three hours ago." As usual along with the kitchen staff, they would be the last to bed and the first up in the morning.

-0-0-

Arthur smiled happily at the way Merlin and Gawaine had rearranged his chamber. He nodded at Merlin, "This is certainly more promising."

Merlin helped Arthur with his boots. Arthur then said that he would manage the rest himself. Merlin wanted to laugh as Arthur's manner of getting undressed left a lot to be desired. He literally got out of what he was wearing and left it where it had fallen on the floor. At least if he was helping him, he would have placed any discarded clothing on the bed but as Arthur smiled at him for being so clever and undressing himself, Merlin grinned back and was then faced with the chore of picked up everything and folding it. Agreed, if he were alone he might have done the same thing but everything on the floor had to finally be picked up either before he went to bed or once he got up in the morning.

Arthur settled in the bed, the room was perfect, not too big but with a fair sized bed suitable for a king and luckily for Merlin spacious enough for him to join his majesty. The room being on the back of the hearth was almost as warm as the main room.

"Are you warm enough? I can get another blanket for the bed if you need it."

"No, I can already feel the warmth radiating off the stones. Let's hope we don't cook overnight."

"I'll open a window if it gets too hot."

"Do you know how hard you are to awaken during the night? You become like a rag doll, I'll grant you an attractive rag doll but of very little use to anyone once you fall asleep." Merlin mumbled something to Arthur who grinned before adding, "Thanks, I'll try that the next time I need you."

Merlin smiled to himself and slipped his arms around Arthur. He hoped the others felt warm enough. Even though Merlin had unrolled their bedrolls to use as covers, he had been happy to see that someone probably Thomas had thought ahead to include in the supplies the heavy woollen blankets.

Arthur dozed off and Merlin lay listening to the lodge settle. The wood creaked and the wind moaned around the building. It was a clear night and he could see an outline of the room and hoped he didn't stumble over anything if he had to get up during the night. He smiled figuring that Gawaine would be up and down the stairs all night as he had drunk so much or maybe there was a chamber pot in each of the upstairs rooms. He snuggled into his own personal heat source and fell asleep.

-0-0-

He woke up to the sound of geese honking. Even this late in the year some geese where still travelling south to their winter homes. Merlin remembered how plentiful the geese were on the rivers and wetlands around Ealdor in the winter. They were a welcome change from rabbits and chickens, especially over Yuletide when families would share a roast goose. Daylight was beginning to filter through the trees, the room was colder than last night and he hoped that someone was keeping the fire fed. He decided against doing it and snuggled into Arthur purposely waking him up.

"It's early and the geese woke me up."

"…and you want me to sing you a lullaby to get you back to sleep?"

"I thought maybe you could think of something better to do. We really should find out just how comfortable this bed is."

Arthur rolled over and grinned, "You, Merlin, are a very bad influence on me?"

"Me? Come on, Arthur, I might be the instigator but you will be a very willing participant. Tell the truth…" But he got no further as Arthur had propped himself up on his elbow and was kissing him.

Later, Merlin whispered, "…a fitting way to inaugurate the hunting lodge, don't you think, My Love?"

-0-0-

Slowly the lodge woke up to the smell of oatmeal, grilled fish and fresh bread. Merlin stretched luxuriating in the fact that he was neither cooking nor serving. "Arthur, get up! It's time for breakfast."

Arthur mumbled something inaudible and turned over.

"Well, I'm hungry so I'm getting dressed and eating, you can come to the table in your smalls if you want. If not, get up now!" Pulling the blankets off him, Merlin managed to get him on his feet. In no time, they were both dressed and ready to join the others at the table.

"Come here!" said Arthur.

Merlin pulled away, "Arthur, we don't have time to fool around."

"I wasn't going to do anything just try to run my fingers through your hair. You have a very attractive bed head and I'd rather you kept the dishevelled look only for me." He leaned forward and ran his fingers through Merlin's hair straightening it out then he popped a kiss on his nose and gave him a little hug. "I love you so much!" he whispered and then he was gone out the door to join the others at the table.

-0-0-

Everyone had slept well and was in the right frame of mind. Arthur showed them maps of the area and sent them off in groups of three to get the lay of the land. He sent a squire with each group keeping Gawaine with him, Merlin and the squire Edward. Each group set off to their designated area towards the east, north, west and south.

Merlin kept his eyes peeled for game and saw many rabbit tracks but also interestingly frequent trails with deer tracks. He was warm and quite enjoying himself. There seemed to be an abundance of game as he also saw some areas of ground which had been disturbed by boars as they rooted for tubers. He remembered Gaius telling them that that ate anything which came their way from fallen nuts and berries, birds eggs, carrion even snakes, lizards and mice. Beside hunters, wolves were their only enemy. He decided Arthur should be satisfied with the location of the lodge and the surrounding area. They had walked maybe four miles when they reached a large fast flowing river.

He was miles away when Arthur spoke to him. He turned to him saying, "What?"

"Merlin, I said swim over there and tell me what is on the other bank."

Looking at him in disbelief, Merlin said, "…but I'll get wet."

"Well, you don't expect Gawaine or me to get wet, do you? I'm the king and he's a knight, do as I say!" Gawaine snickered in the background and Arthur glared at him. "Well, are you going to obey my command?"

Merlin walked to the edge of the river and figured that he wouldn't even want to swim Iago across it. The current was too swift and there seemed to be no place to land on the far bank which was very steep and high. He looked at Arthur thinking, 'What is he playing at? I'll be swept away and there is no one down stream to help me out.' He walked to the bank and knelt dipping his hand into the water, it was freezing. He rubbed his wet hand down the side of his pants and stood up. If the squire had not been present, he would have told Arthur what he thought of him. He looked at the squire who was more interested in seeing how far he could throw stones in the water, so turning he gave Arthur the one finger salute.

Gawaine burst out laughing and a smile crossed Arthur's face. He said aloud, "Change in plans, I think it would be better if we continued down this side of the river and make this the farthest point of our trek."

As Gawaine and the squire walked along the bank, Arthur held back for Merlin, falling in beside him as they walked. He smiled and Merlin scowled at him. "You seemed to be having such a nice time," said Arthur, "I was worried that something was wrong, you hadn't complained once."

Finally Merlin grinned, Arthur had only been fooling but for just a little while he had been sure that it was really what he had expected him to do. "I wouldn't have gone into the river, you know. It would have been crazy. I'd have been swept away and then you would have been all alone."

"I would have managed!"

"Yeah?" Merlin said, with a smile, "Maybe tonight, we could pretend that I never made it back…I can bunk with the knights."

Arthur's smile disappeared, "I wouldn't have let you do it…it was just to see if you were still with us. You seemed to be in a world of your own and I was tired of chatting with Gawaine. Forgiven?"

Smiling at him and shifting his weight so that he bumped into him affectionately, Merlin said, "Forgiven."

Arthur smiled, "…and you'll stay with me tonight?"

"Yes, unless I get a better offer!"

There was a squawk as Merlin left the path and tumbled into the undergrowth. Gawaine turned to the squire Edward saying, "Merlin is so clumsy but the king can take care of him." He quickened his speed and Edward followed just glancing back to see the king smiling as he hauled his manservant out of the tall grasses back onto the path. If he had kept watching he would have seen the king wrapping his arms around Merlin and doing what in any other circumstances might have been considered giving someone a loving hug.

A while later they stopped for lunch. They'd been out over three hours. The terrain in areas was solid forest with a lot of deadfalls. Merlin passed out bread, dried beef and apples. They drank from a stream and as it seemed to be sparsely forested Arthur decided they would walk along it. Merlin gauged their direction by the sun and with the sun on their left, they walked hopefully in the direction of the lodge.

Suddenly, Arthur grabbed Merlin's shoulder and pulled him to a halt, Gawaine and Edward did the same. Arthur pointed to his right and there was a young wild boar. He swung up his crossbow and there was a squeal and some thrashing then silence.

"Well," said Merlin. "That spoilt an otherwise wonderful day."

"We were supposed to be surveying hunting areas not taking a ladylike stroll through the woods," Arthur insisted. "It was an opportunity not to be missed, anyway we can have it tomorrow for supper."

Gawaine grinned licking his lips. He stepped forward and swung the boar off the ground onto a boulder and gutted it. Merlin cut down a sturdy branch and with its legs tied, the carcase was strung on it. He and Edward shouldered the ends of the pole and followed Arthur and Gawaine back to the lodge.

-0-0-

They were the first group to return and they handed the boar over to the servants. Slowly the other groups drifted back, most of them grinning with anticipation of the next day's full hunt. Romney came back with a brace of pheasant and two of grouse and the squires sat outside plucking the birds which would be served with the roast venison supper.

Arthur mentioned his boar and was greeted with a cheer. It seemed fitting that the inaugural stay at the lodge should come with a celebratory supper.

Once the meal was finished, Rook, Aislin, Romney and Arthur sat at the table discussing the areas visited. It was decided that on the following day, they would stay in the same groups and hunt the same areas. Not all areas seemed to be as plentiful with game as others but groups could be finally rotated so everyone would get a chance to hunt.

The knights sat around drinking until Arthur stood up saying he was ready to turn in.

Merlin thought happily about the hearth stones which would have warmed their room. Once Merlin had picked up after Arthur, he said cheekily, "I didn't get a better offer," as he slipped into bed next to Arthur snuggling into him.

"Good!" was the muffled reply.

Silence descended on the lodge as everyone, squires and servants slept.


	8. Chapter 8

**CHAPTER 8 : AN UNCALLED FOR CRITICISM **

For the next two days, the hunting was in full swing, Arthur managing to get his fare share of kills. With no established trails, it was labour intensive getting the carcases to areas where they could be loaded on packhorse. Back at the lodge, the field dressed kills were hung in a lean to. Once there were enough to load four packhorses, a groom and a young stable hand set off for Camelot loaded down with eight fair sized deer and three boars with a groom and a young stable hand. Merlin marvelled at how willing the horses were to follow each other. He laughed to himself imaging Iago carrying a dead stag, he'd have had to be blindfolded to load it and even then he wouldn't have been happy. If he had been tied to the packhorse in front of him, he would have caused such a disturbance that bedlam would have ensued. He loved the flighty little chestnut.

"Merlin, stop daydreaming, we need a hand here."

Merlin turned as Arthur and Gawaine were dragging a fair sized boar back to one of the areas when it could be picked up by horse. In a few years trails would have been opened up making the pickup of the kill easier as they would allow the horses to be brought in closer. Today, however it was man power which would get the kill as close as possible to the lodge to be loaded.

There was a waterfall close to the lodge. It ran out between two boulders and cascaded down into a small stream which meandered down the hill. The squires had found it remarking that in the summer weather it would have been a great place to fool around in and bathe.

Gavin commented, "Right, as long as no one pees in it if that's the source of drinking water for us and the horses."

Ritson said that he was sure that the water the servants were using came from above the waterfall.

Gawaine just shook his head, his mother had always said that you would eat a peck of dirt before you died and in a pinch as long as it is wet, he figured water was water. Mind you, he'd seen horses turn their noses up at water which men had drunk quite happily. He used his horse as a guide, if good old Molly refused it so would he.

He remembered the brown water on the Brecons and how Merlin had assured everyone that it was safe to drink. Gawaine remembered that some of the knights preferred to drink from their water skins and were reluctant to refill them with the brown water. Merlin warned them that later in the day they'd be not only very thirsty but sorry to boot.

Soon everyone was gathered back in the lodge. They had reached the quota of animals which could be carried by the remaining packhorses. Tonight would be their final meal and it was to be the boar which Arthur had claimed his first day out. Cut into manageable pieces, it had been roasting on a spit over the fire.

Arthur had checked the lean to and counting the eight deer and three boars already in transit there were another six deer, three boars and an assortment of fowl. There were a couple of good sized stags, the others being does. The tally for the first hunting party in the new lodge was fourteen deer and six boars being carried back to Camelot for the winter.

Merlin who was tagging along, mentioned that he hoped that there were sufficient packhorses to carry everything, not that he minded hanging dead birds and rabbits on his horse, but anything bigger resulted in the tack being bloodied and needing attention. He was determined not to put anything on Arthur's Favoury as the grey would be blood stained and her tack which had quite a few brass medallions and buckles would give the staff extra work.

"Stop being so fussy, you'd have thought that you were brought up in court and didn't want to dirty your hands. Most things can be washed off and then you'd be as good as new…well maybe not new but back to your normal self."

Merlin snorted, "I've probably had dirtier hands than you ever had. You had the wherewithal to at least use soap and nice warm water; we used to rub out hands with sand to get rid of the dirt and then have to rinse them in the stream. Anyway, not everything comes off that easily, remember when you leaned me against a tree in Woolbridge and it was full of sap and my tunic got stuck. Now that was something which didn't come off easily."

"But, if I rightly remember the tunic did!" said Arthur with a grin. Merlin's mind flashed back to the ensuing pleasures and he laughed.

The smell of the roasted boar carried into the lodge. The kitchen staff had worked hard to prepare a special meal with their limited supplies. Rook had found a wild apple tree and had brought in a burlap sack of apples. Merlin had helped the staff by roasting them in the hearth with mushrooms he had found. He could quite happily live off the land. It was surprising how bountiful the forest was.

The meal was soon ready, roast boar in its own juice and grouse with apples, mushrooms, turnips and thick peasant style bread. Complementd with good ale, it was a feast fit for a king. Before the meal began, the dragon above the hearth was toasted and Romney also added, "For the love of Camelot!" Everyone echoed his words.

Arthur had suggested that the squires should eat at the end of the table as a special honour. Edward on behalf of the others thanked the king. Arthur joked, "Don't get used to it as this is a special event! Once back in the castle you will revert to being four among many but thank you for your services these last few days."

Merlin smiled, it was little events like this supper which helped reinforce the squires' faithfulness to the king. They saw themselves as people of importance and who doesn't like a little acknowledgment for a job well done. He remembered the first time that Arthur had thanked him for doing something instead of his usual grunts. The word had echoed around his mind and when he had returned that night to Gaius he remembered telling him that Arthur had actually said, 'Thank you, Merlin.'

He was so impressed however, Gaius cut him down to size saying, "Merlin, he must have been distracted. Arthur has had servants from day one and he rarely even notices that they are around let alone thanking them. Are you sure it was directed at you?"

"I was the only person there. Anyway, I know that he meant it." He wasn't going to tell Gaius that his heart had almost exploded as Arthur had looked at him and smiled as he said it. That would just have been silly as he was only a servant and Arthur was a crown prince. The longer he spent with Arthur the more attached to him he had become. He realised early on that for him, looking after Arthur was more than just any job. It felt like the job which had been predestined for him. He was tired working all hours of the day but he was happy and managed to make sure that he mentioned that in the letters he sent back to his Mam in Ealdor.

His mind skipped ahead many years and he remembered the first time Arthur had put his arm across his shoulders, leaving it there a little longer than necessary. He remembered the smouldering looks they had exchanged as they sat facing each other across a campfire. He remembered the first kiss hesitant on each part and the feeling that his heart was going to burst and the fear that guards would be called and he would be carted off to the dungeons for being so forward with his master.

He glanced at Arthur sitting beside him and felt his hand on his thigh and once again was blown away that this wonderful man was his and his alone. He slipped his hand over Arthur's and squeezed it lightly and then left it there with their fingers entwined.

Gawaine broke the mood by asking, "Merlin, are you left handed? I always thought that you used your right hand."

Arthur saved the day by saying, "You must have realised how talented he is, he's ambi…whatever it is. Aren't you?"

Merlin went to nod and realised that Arthur's hand was on the move and he almost choked.

Suddenly realising what was happening, Gawaine fell silent and grinning to himself, had glanced at Merlin and winked as others joined in the conversation.

"I had a friend who could use either hand as well as the other. Drove the court ladies crazy while we were learning to write as he could get his work done twice as fast as he did two words at the same time," Gavin added.

Merlin knew what ambidextrous meant but surely the boy would have had to have two brains to achieve independent actions. He'd have to ask Gaius about that one.

-0-0-0-

Later picking up Arthur's clothes he had smiled to himself. Arthur picking up on it said, "A private thought or a joke to be shared?"

"No, it's really nothing, just thinking about Gavin and the page who could write independently with each hand. I can't figure out how he could do that especially as a child."

Arthur made some off-colour remark about how the man must now be much in demand and Merlin fell into bed laughing.

It was to be their last night in the lodge, tomorrow they would leave to return to Camelot. Another group of packhorses were ready to be loaded and would depart at dawn and then all that would remain were the knights' and pages' horses, the kitchen staff's horses and the kitchen supplies' packhorse.

-0-0-

Finally following breakfast, the knights were ready to leave. It was a very relaxed group which rode out mid-morning. Arthur happily led the cavalcade out of the forest towards their proposed overnight stop at the abandoned village. Merlin fell back to ride with Gawaine and Romney took his place next to Arthur.

The day had turned nasty, Arthur wrapped his heavy woollen cloak around him turning to notice Merlin doing the same. Gawaine was chatting away seemingly oblivious to the chill in the air. The trees stood like sentinels and Merlin shivered attributing it to the cold.

Arthur the inveterate huntsman, had his crossbow primed lying across his saddle. He knew there was no packhorse to carry another carcase. He shrugged, someone would have to ride double and free up a horse. He smiled to himself his mind wandering to years ago when riding double with Merlin usually meant it took double the time to arrive at their destination

Suddenly, he was conscious that Favoury had collected herself. He gazed between her ears and saw a handsome buck seemingly mesmerized by horses in his kingdom, his eye also picked up the shadows of does in the woods behind him.

He raised his bow and let the arrow fly. At the exact same moment, a voice called, "Arthur, no!"

The buck leapt from a standstill to a gallop crashing blindly through the forest, followed by the rest of his herd. The arrow imbedded itself in a tree.

The name Merlin echoed through the woods. The group of riders came to a halt. Romney pulled off the trail making his way back to Gawaine. Merlin meanwhile had walked forward to be next to Arthur. The others pulled back to give them privacy.

Arthur glared at him saying in a low voice, "Don't ever do that again! I have no need for anyone and certainly not a manservant to tell me what or when I can hunt in my royal reserve."

But Merlin was determined to get his point across, "Arthur... he was a prime buck, we'd already taken two and he is needed to produce good youngsters."

Arthur half-heartedly swiped at him and said, "If you know what's good for you, you'd better get out of my sight!"

Merlin looked at him in surprise. He and Arthur had often discussed the merits of protecting superior animals to continue the quality of the herd. Merlin turned Iago and made his way to ride behind the pages. Aislin muttered as he passed him, "Give him a couple of hours and he will have forgotten it."

Merlin shook his head in response; he knew that Arthur had not been fooling. He had overstepped his bounds as a manservant. He had criticised the king in public not just in front of his close friends but other knights and squires as well.

He knew in the end that he wouldn't apologise for the gist of his message just for the manner in which he had given it. He knew well enough to leave Arthur alone. He would speak to him before they retired for the night.

-0-0-

Arthur was annoyed at himself. Being greedy was a fault and his need to show the assembled riders that he could bring down another deer had resulted in Merlin's criticism and a true statement about quality begetting quality. The two of them had discussed this frequently with the Master of the Hunt and called off hunting certain areas, allowing the population to grow. He knew that he had been in the wrong but Merlin had overstepped his position. Arthur if he could have taken back the words would have but they now lay heavily on his heart. He knew Merlin well enough to know that he realised that Arthur had spoken in haste by that didn't alleviate the hurt and embarrassment he had caused him in front of the others.

If only they had been alone, it would have been like water off a duck's back but now the jovial spirits of the riders returning to Camelot after their first stay at the new hunting lodge, had been dampened and they rode along in silence both Arthur and Merlin wishing they had the power to take back the words.

They broke for lunch after they had forded the large river which wound its way through the area. Merlin was sitting against a tree wondering who the first person had been to find the rocky shoal or gravel bar which made the crossing easier. He envisioned some hunter wrapped in furs watching deer using the passage and doing likewise. He was miles away when Gawaine spoke to him, "Feeling a little better?"

Merlin nodded. He had kept out of Arthur's way and was sitting with Gawaine and Aislin. The latter realising that the two of them would like some privacy had got up stretched and wandered into the woods. "If I could have bitten my tongue, I would have but, no such luck…I could tell by his face as I accused him of wanton destruction that he knew he was in the wrong but after all, he is the king…"

"…and you are his better half!"

"That only counts in the bedchamber and when we are among friends. I was out of line and both of us know that."

Gawaine thought for a moment and confided, "It will blow over and maybe tonight you and he could have a tête-à-tête."

Merlin burst out laughing, "You've been associating with too many Ladies of the court. You're beginning to talk as they do. No, I think what Arthur and I need is a man-to-man discussion and I will apologise for spoiling his shot but not for my comments about what he intended to do."

Gawaine put his arm across his shoulder and bending his head towards him said, "You know better than any of us how to deal with Arthur so I'll leave you to it."

Arthur had not enjoyed the lunch break. His mind was all over the place and if he had to tell the truth he had missed having Merlin sitting beside him chatting about all sorts of things under the sun. No, he corrected himself he missed Merlin just sitting beside him. He stood up, there was no reason sitting around any longer, the men had eaten the horses had been watered and it was time to get back on the trail. He walked towards Roston who had his horse and said, "Mount up!"

The file of knights and squires continued on their way.

"Gawaine, I think you should ride up with the others, no use in having Arthur annoyed with both of us," Merlin said. "Iago and I are quite happy tagging along after the packhorses. Shame it's not the summer as he would have been quite happy to eat the countryside as he travelled."

Gawaine grinned, Arthur hated how Merlin gave his horses a little more freedom than he would have and subsequently, Iago often had a mouthful of greenery which he had snatched from a convenient branch. Gawaine did as suggested and as he joined the others, Arthur turned and looked in his direction but he knew that it was not him he was checking for.

Slowly, the trail opened up and joined another track and the horses set off at a trot. The loaded packhorses remained at a slower pace and Merlin moved Iago up so that he was now behind the squires. In a few hours, they would reach the abandoned village and set up for the night. Merlin had already decided that he would not be staying in the same area as Arthur as he didn't feel that he would be welcomed. Arthur was surprised when they stopped and Merlin stepped forward to take Favoury, he knew he could trust her with him but he didn't acknowledge him and just strode off into the building.

Gawaine watching them shook his head. The squires built a fire and in no time the area was warmer. Merlin told the squire Edward to take Arthur's bedroll into the area the king had previously stayed in with Sirs Romney and himself and to build a fire in there. "You'll be responsible to see that the king is looked after during supper and that the fire is kept burning all night. The others will take care of the fire in the main area. Stay out of his way but be ready to get him whatever he needs should he request something."

The kitchen staff quickly had a thick broth and roasted grouse ready for everyone. All the knights ate together. The conversation was subdued and Merlin knew that Arthur had hardly said two words since he had arrived. Gawaine sat himself beside him and tried to include him in the conversation with Rook and Aislin but in the end even he shrugged his shoulders, if Arthur wanted to act a silly billy, let him.

Merlin took his bedroll and went outside. He was still picking up strange vibrations from the buildings. He felt that they were directed at him so he had no qualms about leaving Arthur inside. He walked a way off and finding a large chestnut tree bedded down under it. He had to brush a couple of conkers out of his way before he could lie down. He held the prickly half dried out casing and opened it to reveal the shiny nut inside, a favourite food of deer. The conkers brought back memories of Ealdor. In the early autumn, boys used to string the conkers and try to crack their friends' conkers by swinging at them. He recalled it was fun and remembered having once hidden a handful in his house until the next season as then there were really hard, sort of wrinkled, dull and dried out looking but definitely strong.

Even better he remembered the battles, they used to have. They were forbidden but they had them anyway. Two lines of children separated by a ditch or a stream would pelt each other with conkers. In winter if there was snow, it was snow balls. The idea was to score a hit even though you lost your conker to the other team. Usually the numbers of children playing diminished as a conker in the shin even through rough spun trousers or a skirt was not pleasant and most of the girls couldn't get their conkers across the stream and usually gave up but one little miss called Henrietta was the bane of Merlin's life. Looking back now, he realised that she had obviously liked him but her way of showing it was to choose him as her opponent and pelt him as hard as she could. She often outlasted some of the boys. However, running out of conkers meant that each side could claim victory and they all went off as friends with bumps and bruises which obviously had to be explained to their parents. Luckily no one had lost an eye but looking back as an adult, Merlin could understand why the village parents worried about conker fights.

He made himself as comfortable as possible and as his present problem came back to him, he sighed and tried to get some sleep.


	9. Chapter 9

**CHAPTER 9 : A RIGHTEOUS FIGHT**

Merlin woke a couple of hours later. He was unsettled and sleep refused to return.

_Arthur was standing before him clad in his coronation robes. He could see a light through the trees and Arthur turned and walked towards it. He was alone so Merlin decided to follow him. The light was from a candle in a cottage which should not have been there. He had walked along the path on his way to the tree and there definitely hadn't been any cottage. He lost sight of Arthur and made his way around the cottage perimeter but all seemed quiet. He ventured closer realising that the door was open. He paused and then not picking up any negative feelings, he walked towards it. He placed his hand on the cold stone wall and felt a slight but not unpleasant tingle. The doorway was open so he glanced inside. It looked lived in, there was a fire smouldering in the hearth and the candle on the table. _

_He could feel that the cottage was empty but that at some time it had been occupied. Why it had materialised now, he didn't understand. On the table in the flickering candlelight, was Arthur's crown lying on a beautifully illustrated parchment. It reminded him of one of Geoffrey's favourites from the library of Camelot. The script was very fanciful and difficult to read but he was able to make out a few words. 'Peace to him who reads this. Be brave of heart and stand your ground. A king needs strong friends not grovelling subjects'._

_Merlin felt guilty and reached out to touch the crown but it dematerialised before him. He reread the script. It seemed to make no sense._

He woke suddenly in the early morning light as a hoofed animal entered the clearing.

It glanced at the figure below the tree but then decided it was no threat and walked forward picking through the leaves looking for conkers. Merlin blinked, as what he had thought was a deer was in reality a unicorn. It kept picking up the conkers and trying to extricate the nuts avoiding the sharp prickles on the casing. Merlin couldn't help but smile. It came closer and nosed his boot snuffling at it. It looked carefully at him and left, turning once to check on him before disappearing into a thicket.

Merlin had an affinity for unicorns. Over the years had had been blessed with their company. Suddenly, he felt better than he had in days. He knew what he was going to do. He would remain strong for Arthur. They would see their way through this problem as they had all the others but he was not going to cower before him and plead for forgiveness. When forgiveness was given, it would be mutual.

He got up, stretching and grabbed his bedroll. He could hear the horses moving restlessly waiting for their rations and he needed to have breakfast and get Favoury ready for Arthur and Iago for himself. Once they got back to Camelot, he would have plenty of time to decide what his plan for the future would entail. If Arthur wanted him out of his sight so be it but he didn't intend to give up that easily.

He joined the group of knights and sat down eating the hot porridge which he hadn't prepared. This was for him a novelty as too often, he was in charge of preparing the food. Bread and cold roast pork completed the meal. He nodded at Gawaine and went to saddle Favoury. She made a fuss of him. He liked horses and was willing to give them his time asking for nothing in return. As he saddled her, he could feel Iago nibbling at his jacket. He was quite demanding especially if another horse was receiving Merlin's attention. Merlin turned and put his arms around the chestnut's neck and buried his head in its mane. He pulled back, smiled and ran his hand down the horse's nose saying, "And I love you too…"

From a distance, Arthur watched the interchange of affection and hearing Merlin's words, felt his heart clench. 'You're a stupid fool,' he thought, 'He's not talking to you but his horse and your body is betraying you!'

Merlin finally had both the horses ready and walked towards Arthur between the two horses with their reins in each of his hands, he passed Favoury's reins to Arthur and for a second their hands brushed as Favoury pulled away from Arthur wanting to remain with Merlin and Iago.

Merlin dropped his head. It was as if the mare had read the distance between the two men. Arthur nodded a curt thank you and pulled Favoury toward him, turning back to the other knights who were standing talking. Merlin swung Iago the other way towards the staff. His heart was clenched and he could still feel the burn from Arthur's hand.

On Arthur's command, they mounted and started the last leg of their return trip home. They should reach Camelot in the early afternoon. Merlin suddenly realised that he wasn't too sure of what his schedule would be once home. Did he still have to serve Arthur or was his place going to be taken by some other servant? He decided to play it by ear; presenting himself for the job and letting Arthur have the final decision.

The area they were travelling was varied with low hills and flat meadows. Everyone was in high spirits. They had outdistanced the packhorses and it was just the knights and squires. Merlin without thinking had tagged along with them. He rode with Romney in comfortable silence. He laughed at the chatter of the four squires behind him and had turned to make some comment to Edward. If he had not, he would have noticed Arthur looking at him.

Romney caught Arthur's eye and nodded. Arthur had sought him out the night before asking him to keep an eye on Merlin. Romney who was Arthur's senior by seven years had nodded. As a squire he had accompanied the young page Arthur usually with Gielbert and the three had remained close friends. There had been no need for him to say anything as Arthur had said, "He's such an idiot that he's likely to get lost and hurt himself."

Romney had so wanted to say that Arthur's present behaviour was idiotic and that the two of them should just put the past behind them and grow up. However, it was not his position as a knight to advise the king on matters of the heart. His thoughts were interrupted as Merlin said, "Guess, overall it has been a successful opening of the new lodge. We certainly sent enough meat back to the castle."

"I don't think Arthur can complain about that," Romney agreed. "I'll be glad to get back to the family...seems weeks since I saw Mattie."

"…and Rupert!" said Merlin laughing, "You can't tell me that you have already forgotten your baby boy."

Romney smiled but then became serious as he said, "Merlin, are you going to be alright when we get back?"

Merlin smiled sadly saying, "I'll manage. Hopefully, by Yuletide this whole mess will be sorted out and Arthur will have forgiven me."

"…and you him?" said Romney quietly.

"Already have…" said Merlin and put his heels to Iago to close the gap between the other knights.

-0-0-

Gaius was pleased to see Merlin return safely. He noticed that he seemed a little subdued but attributed it to Arthur's demanding nature. He had heard through the grapevine of the laden packhorses returning daily and like many others in the castle he was pleased to think that the hunting trip had been a success. With such a large household, hunting was a daily event for the Royal Huntsman and his staff. Now, at least the meat lockers would be full but in no time they would need to be restocked. Yuletide celebrations put a burden on food which was in stock.

Gaius enjoyed yuletide celebrations. In his senior years he was much less involved with all the frivolity but he had happy memories of days past. There would be twelve days of celebrations, various feasts in the grand hall and private suppers other nights. The king would celebrate one night with all the court. There would also be a night devoted to the armed men who took care of the castle's defences. The staff would not be forgotten with large celebrations in their servants' quarters.

Already the cooks had in mind what would be presented on the first night's feast. It was an opportunity to show to any visitors in residence how well the king's table was appointed. Many culinary delights were only prepared for feasts, not only Yuletide but also weddings, investitures and entertaining visiting royalty.

Gaius was brought out of his reminiscing when the door opened and Merlin came in. "Sorry, I only had time to say a quick hello before but I had a few things to finish for the king."

Picking up on the phrase, the king, Gaius looked at Merlin saying, "Is everything all right?"

"Nothing wrong that won't blow over in a couple of days. We had a slight altercation and Arthur is still nursing a grudge."

"How was the lodge?"

"Excellent, the location was perfect and using it as a base for hunting worked out admirably. Game was plentiful and by the end of the second day, we had enough meat to started sending the packhorses back to Camelot. The lockers must be full to capacity right now."

Merlin sat by the fire. He was tired; it had been stressful serving Arthur at supper and keeping his distance. He kept getting questioning looks from the knights as he stood at the sideboard waiting to serve. He knew that Thomas was quite capable of looking after not only Arthur but the knights however; he felt it was his position to be present. In the end, he just kept his eyes caste down to avoid their glances. Arthur had said nothing. Gawaine he could see was getting a little annoyed and Leon was trying to keep the conversation going.

Finally Merlin he said, "Well, I'd better get back as my name will be mud if Arthur is waiting."

Looking at his dejected demeanour, Gaius said nothing. He knew that if Merlin needed his advice, he would have asked for it.

Merlin made his way back to Arthur's chambers; he was still sitting in the private dining room with a few knights so Merlin waited in the antechamber until he was needed. It was difficult preparing their bed, knowing that he wouldn't be sleeping there. He laid out Arthur's night clothes and prepared hot water so he could wash. Not a word passed between them as Merlin helped his disrobe. He hung up all his clothes and emptied the ewer. Arthur was sitting in front of the fire and Merlin removed the warming pans and as Arthur stood up he pulled back the covers. Arthur slipped into the bed and Merlin waited to see if he would say anything. He didn't.

Walking to the door, Merlin said, "Good night, Sire!"

The silence lay heavily between them. Merlin let himself into the antechamber and stood by the wall. Should he have said something? Maybe he'd have to take the first step but his pride stopped him and he let himself out of the royal chamber and made his way to the turret room which he had visited earlier lighting a fire and spreading the blankets in front of it to air.

Arthur heard the outer chamber door click shut and said, "Shit!"

-0-0-

Merlin didn't sleep well; his mind was racing remembering all the good times they had had in this, their private little chamber. The conversations, the discussions, the plans they had made and certainly the loving. The cold finally woke him up, it was time to get up, he washed in cold water and put more logs on the fire, he wanted to keep the room warm as unless something happened he'd be there for another night. As it was, it was closer to two…

-0-0-

It was Gawaine who acted as the catalyst. Meeting Merlin one afternoon in the portico Gawaine complained, "I've had enough! You're skirting each other like two stags in rut. If it will make you feel any better take it out on me but I can't take this. He's acting like a righteous retired politician and you like a jaded paramour. As my Granddaddy used to say, 'Shit or get off the pot.' If treating me like a punch bag would take your mind off things go ahead…so be it. " He turned looking thoughtfully at Merlin, " He might be the king but he's also a man and I think this refusing to speak to each other has gone on long enough. He snaps at everyone and you might as well become an official mourner for the long face you have." Shifting from foot to foot he continued, "He was wrong calling you out like that but let's face it, you did speak out of turn criticising him in front of knights and squires. He's a prat, let it go and get on with living your life. You're a pain to be around…"

Merlin's fist collided with Gawaine's face. Merlin looked at his friend in shock. He'd hit out like a crazed animal. Gawaine was taken by surprise and all Merlin heard was a sudden intake of breath and the shocked man saying, "Umph!"

Taken aback and by instinct, Gawaine caught Merlin on the nose.

At the moment the blow landed, Arthur put in an appearance. He took a step forward grabbing Merlin's shoulder which at that moment wasn't the brightest move, Merlin whirled and caught him under the chin with a left hook.

Arthur fell back nursing his jaw, "Fucking hell, Merlin! What was that for?" he said grimacing.

At that same moment, Gawaine swung catching his opponent in the side. He was surprised at the solidness of Merlin's body and glancing up realised he'd punched the king.

Arthur roared, "Gawaine! Stand-down! Have you lost your mind?" He put his hands to his side and winced. The noise had drawn some of the others and Leon put out his hand, warning none of them to get involved.

The three combatants stood looking at each other. Arthur spoke first, "I will not condone fighting among my knights."

"Forgotten have you that I'm only a manservant?" said Merlin bent over in pain, his hands blood covered.

Arthur looked at his bleeding nose and his reddening jaw saying, "What were you doing?"

"Role playing..." mumbled Gawaine as he held his jaw rocking it from side to side testing it. He suddenly grinned at Merlin saying, "Feel any better? I've always been of the opinion that acting first and thinking later has its merits."

Merlin took a quick breath and swallowed a mouthful of blood. It went down the wrong way and he started coughing. Arthur was beside him immediately administering not so gentle pats on the back.

"Gawaine, go to wherever you are supposed to be, I'll speak to you later. Merlin, get back to my chambers, clean yourself up and wait for me."

Gawaine walked away wondering why so many of his plans seemed to end up in donnybrooks. He'd asked for it, so if it cleared the air, he'd suffer in silence. He smiled to himself as he walked past Leon realising that Arthur would be sporting a bruise under his tunic for a few days. Not often you got to punch the king and hopefully get away with it. It was Arthur's fault anyway as in interfering in his and Merlin's fight, he deserved to get hit.

Merlin's face felt tender as he dragged his feet back to his chambers. He knew that Arthur was going to read him the riot act but he felt that he had acquitted himself well, two well placed punches each making contact. He thought of going to Gaius first but decided that there would be time later to explain his facial bruising.

Figuring that Arthur wouldn't be back for hours and having missed the luxury of a bath while he was staying in the turret room, he went into the water closet, and looking at the tub said quietly, "_Da mihi aqua calida!"_ Water gushed from the coppers. He stripped throwing his clothes in the corner and lowered himself into the hot water, closing his eyes and allowing his body to relax and soak in some of the heat. Reaching for a wash rag, he gently wiped his face, the cloth came away bloodied. He smiled to himself realising that Gawaine was certainly not enjoying himself at the moment. As a knight, he had punched his Sovereign Lord and although he might be in proverbial hot water, it wouldn't be in a tub.

Lying soaking and completely relaxed, Merlin decided his own punch, if Arthur so desired could be punishable by death as would even Gawaine's. He hadn't meant this stupid quarrel with Arthur to escalate to that. Anyway, Gawaine was not at fault, he had struck first and he would plead that the court be lenient towards his friend. Not that they would probably ask his opinion but he'd give it a try.

Suddenly, the chamber door opened and Arthur came storming in yelling, "Merlin!"

Merlin came to rather quickly and said, "Here, Sire."

Arthur walked across the room and into the water closet; by then a dripping Merlin was wrapping himself in a bath sheet.

"You're in my bad books, not supposed to be luxuriating in my tub. Why in hell's name were you fighting with Gawaine?"

Merlin shrugged, he hadn't got his mind straight about what he was going to tell Arthur. "I…I just lost my temper and hit him."

"You hit him first, why?"

Merlin shrugged, "I don't remember…"

"Well, I'm not buying that. It was over something and until you decide to tell me, you are staying here. Someone will bring you food and you can give this place a good cleaning while I'm out. You'll sleep in the manservant's chamber until you remember what was so important that you lost your temper hitting not only a knight of my realm but me. Men have died for less!"

Arthur walked to the table and sat down pulling some parchments which he fiddled with while Merlin made his way to the armoire, picked out fresh clothes and escaped to the manservant's room to dry off and change. The reason for the original flare up became of second importance. He realised that he had forgiven Arthur for his actions and was now actually congratulating himself that he had managed within such a short space of time, to land two punches at the expense of two very experienced people. He had proved he wasn't the pushover which some people believed him to be.

He decided he was someone to be contended with and then he laughed quietly to himself as on both occasions it had only been luck as he had taken them both by surprise. He would never have purposely hit Arthur but in the heat of the moment he thought he had been Gawaine. He stretched out on the bed in the little manservant's room and contemplated his future. He knew deep down that Arthur would not have him killed, that was silly, if Arthur felt about him one iota as much as he felt for Arthur it would be like cutting off your own limb. He now had to come up with a reasonable answer as to why he had hit Gawaine in the first place…he had laughed at him for being clumsy…he had been trying to brush a fly off his face…Gawaine had insinuated that Arthur's and his relationship was over, no he'd better save that for later.

He closed his eyes and tried to think of more plausible reasons, he jumped when the door opened and Arthur yelled at him to come into the main chamber. He thought to himself, 'Well, I guess it is better being yelled at than ignored…'

They stood in front of each other like two children meeting for the first time after having a fight, wanting to let bygones be bygones but both feeling unsure as to who should make the first move.

Merlin took the initiative taking a step towards his best friend whose arms were crossed over his chest. Slipping his hands under Arthur's arms, he ran them up his chest, gently forcing Arthur's arms away. He waited, letting his body slip into its usual place against Arthur's and was rewarded by feeling Arthur's arms wrap around him and hold him.

He remained still in Arthur's arms until he felt one of him hands migrating lower. He leant against Arthur and felt a ghosted breath over his cheek and heard a whisper of his name and the word sorry.

At that moment, all the hurt and imagined wrongs were forgotten. Merlin slipped his hands between them and started to unbutton Arthur's doublet. He put his hands into the opening and moved them up to his shoulders allowing Arthur to successfully shrug the garment to the floor. He placed his hand under Arthur's chin, raising it and claimed his lips. Time passed and he didn't remember moving but the next thing he knew Arthur was falling backwards onto the bed and he was gazing down at him.

Arthur reached out his hand and whispered, "Merlin…?"

"Arthur, remember you're having supper with the others in the private dining room this evening," he took a step back.

"They can wait…" Arthur was struggling with his boots.

Merlin batted his hands away saying, "Let me, it'll be faster." He straightened up and looked down at Arthur, his heart was bursting, Arthur smiled and that was all the invitation that Merlin needed.


	10. Chapter 10

**CHAPTER 10 : A MOVE ON THE HORIZON **

Merlin lay comfortably in bed next to Arthur his body still and relaxed in the twilight. His mind far from relaxed was running through the last couple of weeks. He felt that he probably had a lot to catch up on, as since their return he had been out of the loop.

Arthur had asked him where he had been hiding himself and he had explained that he had been in full view doing all the usual things he did to keep Arthur's life running smoothly. The only real difference being that he was not at Arthur's elbow during the day and he had been able to spend more time with Gaius. He'd eaten morning and luncheon meals with Gaius as Arthur hadn't asked him to serve him as Thomas was more than capable.

At night, he had always been present for the evening meal, leaving Arthur's chambers only once the king had retired. He'd even managed to get some time with the horses and one day, he had without permission taken Arthur's Mulgan out. None of the stable hands had stopped him and he had ridden down to the lake in the fresh snow. He felt that it had done both him and the horse good to get away from the castle.

On the way back, he'd seen the pages training and had picked out Treva who seemed to be growing in leaps and bounds.

The boy came running over to him. "If you're not busy, can I come and visit you this afternoon?" the boy had asked. "You never told me about the hunting lodge."

"I'd enjoy that but I'm working with Gaius so if you get permission, why don't you come down to his chambers? I'll get Betsy to send up some special raisin cakes and we can have a little party."

"...and Arthur too?"

"No, I think it will be just Gaius, you and me, as Arthur is very busy at the moment." And so…Merlin was able to have one on one time with his adoptive son. He brought him up to date on their hunting trip and promised that one day, Treva would be able to visit the lodge. Deep down, he felt guilty that he had been so engrossed with his own problem that he had not thought about Treva.

Treva chattered on about Arthur and asked if maybe one day the three of them could have supper together. "I haven't seen him by himself since you went off hunting. One day, I delivered a message to Leon and I asked him if I could visit the king and he shook his head and bustled off saying that Arthur was too busy with other people. Then I didn't see you around and I wondered if I had done something wrong and neither of you wanted to see me. I haven't done anything wrong have I, Merlin?"

Merlin's heart went out to the boy. He knew all too well the feeling of missing someone except he didn't have to guess if he had maybe done something wrong, he knew that in Arthur's eyes, he had. He put his arm around Treva's shoulders and apologised for not getting together with him sooner and reiterated that Arthur had indeed been very busy.

Merlin was pleased to hear that he seemed to have no knowledge of the coolness between the men to whom he was officially a joint ward. Gaius enjoyed Treva's visits and one day out of the blue having never mentioned the situation between Arthur and Merlin had said, "You know, it'll break his heart if he ever gets wind of your not being together."

Merlin had spun around saying, "We are together…!"

Gaius had sighed and said into the soup he was heating on the fire, "You know what I meant, Merlin."

-0-0-

Merlin stretched luxuriating in the softness of the mattress and the familiarity of the royal chamber. He lay watching the shadows cast by the fire and finally got up and went to the water closet and ran some water warming it with a blink of his eyes. He looked around the little room at the bath and the coppers. This was really the height of luxury and they would also have the same in the Uther's old apartments. He freshened himself up and poured fresh water for Arthur. He walked back into the room and stood at the end of the bed watching Arthur sleeping. He couldn't take his eyes off him, there was so much relief in standing there knowing that once again they had hurtled an obstacle and were safely united on the far side.

He was still dreaming and a voice said, "Do you always spy on people when they are sleeping?"

"No…only you!" He walked forward and kissed Arthur on the forehead, "Get up, there's hot water for you and then you can get dressed for supper. We're running a little late, so don't dawdle!"

"I can think of better things to do than eat," Arthur complained. "We could sit in front of the fire and talk."

"Can't disappoint your guests now, can we? Come on, it seems ages since I sat beside you sharing a meal.

"I was such a fool punishing you and making myself miserable at the same time. I forgave you long ago and then couldn't figure out how to let you know as whenever I looked at you, you cast your eyes down. Merlin, I missed you." Arthur wrapped his arms around Merlin, it was something that he had wanted to do almost as soon as they had returned to Camelot but his pride wouldn't let him.

"Arthur, I forgave you almost immediately but I couldn't tell you?"

"Why not?"

"Because I had already spoken out of turn once," he smiled, "…and look where it got me!"

Dressed and respectable, Arthur held Merlin's head in his hands to give him a quick kiss before saying, "Let's join the others…"

The invited knights were already gathered in the private dining room being served drinks by Thomas when Arthur and Merlin finally put in their appearance. There was silence as the knights glanced from Arthur to Merlin and it was Gawaine who broke the mood when winking at Merlin, he said, "Finally!"

Arthur glared at him saying, "Know your place, Sir Knight!" However, Merlin nudged Arthur in the arm as they made their way to their seats and he relaxed.

Merlin was pleased to see Simon at the table. He had returned from his visit to his family, to hear of Spenser's injuries from the wolf disaster. Gaius had after a week released Spenser to Leon's care and Leon had arranged for a senior squire to remain with him overnight. With daily visits from either Gaius or Merlin, he had progressed to being able to walk slowly but was confined to his room as per Gaius' orders. Now, that Simon was back, he was able to spend time with him and soon Spenser would be able to walk further afield. Merlin thought Simon had been fortunate not seeing him immediately after the attack.

Although Merlin had been checking in on Spenser regularly, he had not bumped into Simon on his travels around the castle. He was glad that the latter was back as he knew that that would help in Spenser's recovery. He tuned into what was being said around the table and realised that the lodge was still one of the topics of conversation. Everyone had positive things to say about their time there and the amount of meat they now had secured in the castle's meat safes. The upcoming Yuletide was the other topic.

No mention was made about the less than positive journey back to the Camelot. Merlin's regular friends had privately commented to him on Arthur's irrational behaviour but Merlin hadn't encouraged them as it was really his and Arthur's problem. He sighed contentedly, all that was in the past.

Arthur hearing Merlin's sigh, slipped his hand down to Merlin's lap. Merlin entwined his fingers in Arthur's amused by the fact that over the years they had both acquired dexterity in using their non-dominant hands for handling utensils and goblets. He watched Arthur reach for his goblet and take a mouthful of wine. He smiled and wished that they had been dining alone in their chamber. Then he thought it could have been worse as Arthur might have been dining with the court and that would have meant that until the ladies and the majority of the knights had left he would have either been seated with Gaius and standing waiting to serve Arthur. He shifted slightly so that he could feel Arthur's knee against his.

Finally everyone drifted back to their own chambers, leaving Arthur and Merlin alone. Thomas had been in to build up the fire and put the warming pans in their bed. Merlin walked to the window and pulling back the heavy curtains looked out. There was a full moon and it was reflecting off the snow which had fallen earlier in the evening. Everything looked peaceful in the amber glow of the torches in the centre of the courtyard. Merlin tried to remember at whose castle they had first seen the use of overnight lanterns and had brought the tradition home to Camelot but he couldn't remember.

He felt a hand on his waist and Arthur's chin on his shoulder, "Ready for bed?"

Turning and catching Arthur's lips Merlin said suggestively, "Always…if you are the other occupant."

"…and if I were not?"

"Well then, it would depend," laughed Merlin, "On whom your substitute was…"

Merlin made quick work of helping Arthur disrobe. Soon the warming pans were back on the hearth and Merlin slipped into the bed. "Arthur, I forgot to mention Treva, we should have lunch with him. Maybe tomorrow?"

But Arthur who had other plans at the moment just mumbled something non-committal and searched for that spot behind Merlin's ear which marginally got his full attention before he turned into a shuddering mass.

And Treva went out of Merlin's mind as it was completely absorbed by what Arthur was intending to do.

-0-0-

Merlin lay feeling satisfied and certainly much loved, cuddled against Arthur. He thought that they were the stupidest people to fight as they had missed each other so much. Neither one of them had been the victor as they were both punished by the other's absence. He glanced at Arthur who had a smile on his face. "Something funny enough to be shared," he asked.

Arthur turned to him tracing his eyebrows with his finger. "Merlin, the next time I get cross with you, I give you permission to whisper to me, and I mean whisper not yell it in front of all the knights, especially Gawaine, 'Arthur, remember how lonely it is at night all by yourself' and then I'll come to my senses and forgive you on the spot."

Merlin smiled, revenge might seem sweet but sex was sweeter in his book. He wrapped his arms around Arthur and held him close to him. This was really all he wanted in life; Arthur followed at a distance by his Mam, Gaius and Treva. He reminded himself to send a message to his Mam in Ealdor that he wanted her to come and spend some time with them over Yuletide. His eyes closed and he tried to remember to get mistletoe as it wasn't too early to start the kissing tradition.

It must have been around five in the morning, pitch black when Merlin awoke suddenly from a deep sleep. He took a couple of seconds to get his wits about him and then lay perfectly still. He thought that there was something in their chambers besides Arthur and him. Had he in his hurry to turn in forgotten to bolt their chamber door? Regardless of that, Thomas would have locked the antechamber corridor door. The chamber was impermeable. He lay still trying to place the sound. It was common enough, a movement but as if whatever was doing it was reluctant to move quickly. He rolled on his side, slipping his feet off the bed so that they touched the floor. The flagstones were chilly. He slid out of the blankets twisting so that he landed on his knees, crouching hoping to get a better view of the room.

He located the sound once he was upright; it was coming from the dining room. Funny because he felt sure that he had heard Thomas locking the adjoining door once he and Arthur had gone through it into their own chamber. He told his feet not to get cold and walked quietly across the room to find the interior door was unlocked. Anyone could have walked in and found Arthur and him in bed. Anyone could have been across the room in an instant and Arthur could have had a knife in his chest.

Slowly depressing the latch, he opened the door a crack hoping that the hinges had been well oiled. He picked up light in the room from a hand held candlestick. He cleared his throat and the candle wobbled but didn't fall over. He peered over the light to pick out a young maidservant close to tears.

"Well," he said, "To whom do I owe the honour of this midnight visit?"

A little voice said, "Sir, it's me Jennie from the kitchen. When the platters and goblets was dun lass night there wud be a goblet missing and housekeeper said it wuz my fault. She wuz cross and sent me 'ere before we started on the breakfasts to find it." She held out her hands, "I didn't break in and I weren't going to steal nuffin. Peter is outside with the key."

Merlin smiled, "It's all right, Jennie. I'll help you find it." They looked under the table nothing but on one of the less often used side tables was the missing goblet. "Hurry up and get this back to the cook that will keep her in a good mood and King Arthur's breakfast will be on time."

"Thank you, Sir, sorry I woke you up..."

Merlin went with her to the door and nodded at the young man Peter the keeper of the key. "Back to the kitchens, both of you!" He watched them walk down the corridor, thinkink that housekeepers and cooks could be very hard on the staff under them. Apart from it being nice and hot in the winter, the kitchen is one place that he would never have wanted to work.

Arthur rolled over as he got back into bed, saying, "What are you doing wandering around at night? If your feet are cold don't you dare put them anywhere near me."

However, once threatened, Merlin couldn't resist letting his cold toes work their way up Arthur's leg. That led to a couple of squawks which Merlin rewarded with a few kisses and Arthur decided that maybe being awoken early in the morning wasn't that bad after all.

-0-0-

Things were progressing towards Yuletide and the meals were in the planning stages for twelve nights of banquets and suppers of varying importance. The huntsmen were still out daily ensuring that no one would go without food.

The Chamberlain Humphrey was overseeing the preparation of extra chambers to house guests and the families of knights who would be joining their sons for the holiday. He had asked for a meeting with Arthur to present him with the names and numbers of guests. Arthur was happy to see that no requests had been made by other royals to join them over Camelot. He preferred the idea of celebrating with his own men and their immediate families. Winter weather was seldom conducive to travel and most people preferred to spend time holed up in the safety of their homes, no matter how humble. There would be many evenings of celebrations and inevitably following the holiday, there would be announcements of betrothals and even upcoming marriages. These would be held during the summer when visitors would be more easily able to reach Camelot.

Once Humphrey had left, Arthur had mentioned that he was considering installing Treva in their current chambers when they moved to their new ones but upon Merlin's suggestion decided to put it off until he was older. At the moment the boy's chambers were on the floor below closer to the chambers occupied by families of the married knights. Merlin had felt that he would feel isolated on the royal floor. He was outgoing and friendly and had made good friends with all the young pages but Henry was still his constant companion.

Treva had one day confided to Arthur that having a sister might be a good idea. It seemed that Henry's cousin the Lady Pamela had caught the nine year old's eye. "She's very good at riding and is a fine shot with an arrow. Did you know that she is a sister to Timothy?" He told Arthur knowingly, "Timothy is called Pudge by his family. I like that name, it seems friendly."

Arthur nodded, as the arrival of young Pamela had been a shock to Sir Lionel and Lady Cordelia who had felt that after Pudge any more children would have been an improbability. The baby girl had been welcomed with open arms by her family especially her brothers, Timothy and Gielbert. All the ladies of the court were thrilled with a new baby as Lady Cordelia was highly respected and loved by many. However, things hadn't gone as planned, as Pamela's mother never picked up after her birth and died before the baby was a year old. The baby was taken in by Lady Henrietta to be raised in the company of her own baby son Henry. Arthur smiled realising that the Lady Pamela would be a suitable match for Treva when he was of marrying age.

Arthur came back to reality with Treva saying, "Henry calls him Pudge, can I do the same?"

"No, I think that you would have to be invited by the person in question to use his nickname." Arthur smiled hardly feeling that Timothy would want his brother's friend calling him Pudge even if said friend was the King's ward.

Treva had also reminded Arthur that he was taking him to the new hunting lodge as Merlin had promised. Arthur had smiled saying, "If Merlin promised then I will do the same. Now, off you go as I have a meeting to attend. You can walk down with me."

Merlin saw the two of them at the top of the stairs and it filled his heart with love. He knew that he had done the right thing bringing Treva to Camelot and ensuring that he stayed with Arthur and him. Treva had suddenly seen him and raced downwards to him jumping from the second step towards Merlin who caught him and swung him around saying, "One day, you're going to knock me off my feet and we'll both land on the floor."

"That's all right," Treva laughed, "Arthur can pick us up! Anyway, I have to get back to Randall now." He gave Merlin another hug and turning toward Arthur said, "Keep it a secret about you know who!" and he was off in the swirl of his cape.

As Merlin looked puzzled over those last words, Arthur told him about the Pamela conversation. Merlin had laughed saying the maybe in fifteen years, Arthur might be a grandfather. Deep down, Merlin had thought that the idea of having a little sister for Treva would have been nice as he had after all lost two sisters in the ambush which had wiped out his family. He seldom mentioned being an only child but did on occasions make mention of his sisters and his brother Kevin. Merlin often marvelled at how well Treva had coped with the attack and ensuing upheaval. He seemed happy in Camelot. Randall his manservant was devoted to him and the same could be said for Arthur and him.

Arthur slipped his arm around Merlin's waist and said seriously, "We did the right thing didn't we?"


	11. Chapter 11

**CHAPTER 11 : DEATH IS AMONG US**

One day, while Arthur was in a meeting at which he had no need of Merlin, the latter made his way further along the corridor to their new quarters. The workman had finished and a swarm of maids and menservants were dusting down walls, removing not only cobwebs but sawdust and powdered stone dust which had settled into the crevices. As each room was finished, they would complete scrubbing all the chamber floors. Furniture would be uncovered, cleaned and placed in position. The freshly beaten curtains would be returned and hanged.

Merlin wandered through the rooms, they were to his liking. He knew Arthur and he could be happy in the larger chambers. He picked up no negative vibes of its former inhabitant but he had already decided to use some spirit settling invocations which his villagers used when death occurred in a home. He intended to sweeten all the rooms with herbs. Smiling to himself, he thought of the mistletoe which he was going to use liberally as a visual prompt.

He checked the water closet. It had been the first one installed in the castle and was spacious. Work had been completed as it had been decided to replace a few things, the coppers used for heating water as well as the drains. It was now refurbished and ready for use.

As the room had previously been a small bedchamber, Arthur had decided to have the hearth unblocked and put back into working order. He told Merlin that if he was going to relax in a tub it would be nice to be able to watch flames in a fireplace.

He walked through into the solar, it was a sunny day and he could feel the difference in temperature in the room. Huge windows carried across two walls giving extensive views of the countryside. Cracked panes of glass had been replaced and the others cleaned. The shadowed patterns of the leadlight were scattered across the floor. No curtains were used in the room. A solar because of its light was the gathering place for the family with the lady of the house often embroidering and reading in the company of other ladies of the court or visitors, while the royal children might also with their nursemaids, visit their mother. Together, Arthur and he had chosen more neutral tones for the upholstery and furnishings, more reminiscent of Yewdene.

Merlin had kidded Arthur one day, saying that he would have to take up sewing and relax in the solar while he was attended by his closest knights. Arthur's retort was less than complimentary.

The bedchamber would soon be ready; the original furnishing from the bed and windows had been taken away. New material had been chosen and anything needing to be upholstered had been done at the same time. Merlin had seen a sample and he was pleased, it would make the room brighter and fresher. He had also had the carpenters construct another double bench for them. He wanted one in the solar so their old one could be re-upholstered and placed there. The new mattress for the bed was ready and it would be installed once the chamber had been thoroughly cleaned. He was quite looking forward to the move, there were lots of memories attached to their old chamber but nothing would stop them from making new memories after the move.

He had been away longer than expected and upon returning to his chamber had been greeted by a flustered looked Arthur pacing across the room. He'd spun on seeing Merlin and said, "There you are!"

Merlin said, "You were worried?"

"No, I wasn't…"

"Yes, you were, I can see it in your eyes."

Arthur shrugged, "No one knew where you were. Lunch came and went and still you were nowhere to be found I thought you'd been kidnapped or had fallen down somewhere and couldn't move or…"

Merlin interrupted by saying, "Tell the truth and I'll believe you!"

Arthur looked sheepishly at the man before him, "I thought…I thought that you might have left me…"

Merlin put one hand on Arthur's shoulder and used the other to lift his chin. He then put both his hands on either side of his head and said, "Arthur, I will never willingly leave you. You mean too much to me."

Arthur mumbled, "But I thought you had…"

Merlin smiled, "Arthur, if ever I decide to leave it would be after giving you ample time to explain to me why I shouldn't and even then, I'd give you plenty of time to change your mind."

"I know, but you absence got blown out of proportion in my mind…"

"Come here, Silly, you need a hug and a cuddle as sometimes you are your own worse enemy." He pulled Arthur to him, kissed him on his forehead and held him. Their two bodies melded together and Merlin let him go once he felt that Arthur was relaxed. "Aren't you going to ask me where I was?"

Arthur said, "Don't care now that you're back!"

"Well, I'll tell you anyway. I was in our new chambers. We could be in by Yuletide, if you like. They are few things to be finished but already the servants are cleaning the place. Arthur, it's going to be wonderful. We can go and check it out in the daylight tomorrow morning. We need to decide on the placement of a few pieces of furniture. I don't want it to look as if it still belongs to your father."

Arthur nodded, "Right, tomorrow before I supervise the knights' training. Just us…we can always tell Humphrey what we want doing. He'll see to it." And so it was agreed that all being well, the proposed moving date to the new chambers would coincide with Yuletide.

Arthur had absolute trust in Humphrey's ability to take care of things. Merlin smiled to himself, just as Randall looked after Treva, so Humphrey had during Arthur's formative years been his servant. Gaius had raised Arthur as a child but his father the king had reclaimed the boy as a ten year old. Gaius had sensibly paved the way for the separation by arranging for Arthur to already have his own chambers and a trustworthy man to look after him. The king had not been sufficiently interested to interfere.

As Arthur had begun to rely more on Merlin, Humphrey had been promoted as one of the assistants to the Chamberlain. He was respected and well-liked by the castle staff and two years ago Arthur had raised him to the honoured position of Chamberlain upon the death of his predecessor. Humphrey had been an excellent choice and there had been no opposition from the King's council to the promotion.

-0-0-

Arthur would be dining in the hall that evening so Merlin oversaw the clothes which Thomas had laid out for him. He preferred eating in their private dining room as it was more relaxed and only their closest friends were present but Arthur had his duties and regular suppers in the main dining hall were part of them. They went down together and Arthur said, "Sit with Gaius and enjoy the meal, Rhylin can be my server tonight, anyway I always have Thomas nearby."

Supper was half way through, when there was a commotion among the knights. Arthur looked up but it already was being taken care of. When only their group remained, Merlin joined them; he'd been downstairs with Gaius dealing with the knight who had been taken ill. His face was serious; he just shook his head at Arthur and mouthed, "Later."

Within a couple of hours, the knights had broken up and returned to their quarters, by the time Merlin reached their chambers, Thomas had the fire built up and was waiting for further orders. Merlin spoke up, "Thank you. Thomas, could you wait in the antechamber."

Thomas bowed at Arthur and left the room.

Merlin became serious seeking Arthur's eyes. "Gaius thinks that we have a problem on our hands. He isn't happy with Sir Basil's condition. He collapsed at table and Gaius went with him as he was carried down by two knights. His friends reported that he had been complaining of feeling unwell since he returned to Camelot but it is the swellings in his armpits and his groin that have Gaius worried."

Arthur's heart almost stopped. He'd been hearing the news of a disease rampant in other kingdoms. Reports of death following quickly upon falling ill had been rumoured.

"Gaius wants to keep him isolated. He'd just returned from delivering royal missives to Bristol and he had remarked on the general illness among the inhabitants. It's touch and go as if the nodes break the poison will be released and if he is extremely lucky he could survive. Gaius has commandeered the empty storage chambers adjacent to his as a quarantine locations. He has asked the two knights who carried Sir Basil down to remain in the adjacent chambers overnight and has also sent for his squire Marcus, as well as Sir Alan who had accompanied him to Bristol and Hodge who had acted as their groom.

"Cots are being set up and if the illness is contagious, Gaius feels that keeping people away from the general population of the castle would be best. He's hoping that it is an isolated case but doesn't seem very positive and has to be prepared. He asks that all pages and squires be quarantined to their quarters. The knights with families are also to keep to themselves. Luckily Sir Basil had only been back two days but anyone having had contact with him has to see Gaius tomorrow. It is mostly knights of his age, his squire and the stable staff but he could have had contact with anyone in the dining hall."

Merlin gathered up a few clothes, "Arthur, I can't stay with you." Arthur moved forward but Merlin evaded him taking a couple of steps backward. "I worked on Basil with Gaius and I could be infected." He smiled sadly, "You'll have to cope with Thomas until I return." Arthur drew himself up to maximum height ready to forbid Merlin to leave him but Merlin said softly, "Don't argue…it makes no difference. I can't stay! Gaius is waiting for me and we're going to draw up a list of the knights with whom Basil had contact. They will be moved to the lower chambers and watched to see if the disease is present."

"What can I do?"

"Stay here, Love, and keep safe. Gaius says that contact is the way the disease spreads so limiting contact with people is necessary. Hopefully this is an isolated case and it has been identified quickly enough to stop its spread. Thomas will look after you, he hasn't been anywhere near Basil." Merlin turned towards the door and looked over his shoulder, his eyes were glistening as he said, "I'm sorry, Arthur!"

Arthur called after him, "You should have stayed in the dining hall and let Gaius take care of him…" but then he felt bad as he knew that that was one of the things which made Merlin the person he loved, his willingness to help whenever it was needed.

-0-0-

Thomas helped Arthur change then bid the king a good-night and left but Arthur couldn't sleep. He wanted to get up and go to Gaius's to speak with Merlin as he hadn't even had time to tell him to keep himself safe; however he knew he couldn't. His responsibility was to his people, for them he had to keep himself healthy and capable of ruling Camelot. If this was a plague which was going to sweep through his kingdom, his people would need him; not that he would be able to save the afflicted but he might be able to keep down the numbers of deaths within the castle. He figured that with judicial rationing, they should have enough yuletide food and winter stores to see them through a couple of months. Festivities could be cancelled. He prayed to God that these reported cases were isolated. As a youngster, he'd studied history with Geoffrey and he'd read that years ago whole communities had been wiped out especially in busy areas with many travellers and traders.

Tomorrow, he would call a council meeting to review plans which were in place to, if absolutely necessary, seal the castle to strangers. If this illness was widespread, other kingdoms would have done the same. His eyes became heavy and he made his way over to the bed, pulled back the covers and collapsed on it placing his arm where he would have normally found Merlin.

-0-0-

Merlin had insisted that Gaius get some rest so he had sat in the smaller of the isolation area with Sir Basil, who had an acute fever and was thrashing around. No sooner had Merlin covered him with a sheet than he had pushed it off. Merlin persevered and kept sponging him down with a herbal water which Gaius had concocted. The man's chest was as yet unmarked and in the early dawn light, Merlin recoiled in horror as he noticed swellings creeping across the man's torso.

Walking to the fire, he ladled hot water into a bowl and put his hands into it keeping them there as long as he could. He'd see sketches in Gaius's books of monks looking after the sick and then catching the disease and dying themselves. He shook his hands and made his way to Gaius's quarters, removing dried goldenseal, thyme and oregano from the shelves. He rubbed his hands with thyme and then made a mixture of all the leaves, ladling hot water into a bowl he added the dry ingredients. Gaius frequently used these washes for badly infected lesions explaining that they kept his hands from picking up the illness and catching it himself.

Basil's breath was becoming more laboured and Merlin realised the worst. The young knight was going to die and how many along with him was the burning question. He woke Gaius informing him of the change in their patient and telling Gaius what he had done.

Six further knights and three squires presented themselves to Gaius the following day. None of them were feeling sick and none had unexplained swellings. Gaius advised them to stay in their quarters and they would be checked upon daily to see if any symptoms were present. For the squires, it was a holiday sharing a chamber and having meals delivered by serving staff.

In the isolation ward, Basil's squire Marcus was the next to come down sick. He'd only been in Basil's company for two days since his return but he soon was complaining of fatigue. Gaius checked him out and noted no pronounced swellings or skin discolouration. He prescribed herbal teas and told the other knights to encourage him to rest. Each knight was to look after himself and demand nothing of Marcus or the groom Hodge.

By the evening the following day, Marcus felt well enough to sit by the fire and drink some broth. Gaius was pleased the boy seemed better, it had obviously not been what Sir Basil had. Sir Alan was next to get sick with the same symptoms as Marcus, he was moved to the adjacent chamber as he didn't shake it off quickly. Gaius was worried.

Arthur received daily updates. Sir Matthew, Marcus's brother had offered to be the go-between. He stood at the open door to the hallway and spoke to Merlin who was standing halfway down the tower staircase. Merlin gave messages from Gaius for Arthur. He happily reported that Marcus was so much better that he was demanding to return to the squires' quarters which Gaius had vetoed.

Matthew relayed the information to Romney who went to see Arthur,

"Come and sit down!" Arthur said as Romney entered and Thomas stepped forward and filled two goblets with wine, "What's the news?" Romney listed off all the main points which Matthew had mentioned. "...and Merlin?" Arthur wanted to know.

"Matthew said that he seemed chipper and looked well although, maybe a little tired."

"Thomas, have the kitchens prepare roast rabbit tonight for Gaius and the ones in quarantine who are hungry enough to eat."

Thomas smiled, Gaius's choice meat was rabbit. He said, "Yes, Sire!" bowed and left the room.

Arthur turned to Romney continuing to speak, "Thank Matthew from me for his updates. Tell him I'm pleased that Marcus has pulled through. I'm still worried for the others, how about the groom who accompanied them?"

"The groom seems unaffected but Young Alan isn't doing so well. Along with Basil, he seems to be the sickest. Others are eating well and like the squire champing on the bit to be allowed back to the general population of the castle."

"Gaius will have his hands full."

"Not that he isn't quite capable of keeping a handful of knights in line," Romney smiled, "After all he dealt with you as a youngster...!"

Arthur laughed, "Talking about youngsters how's little Rupert?"

Romney's face broke into a big grin, "Splendid, healthy, happy and growing bigger everyday."

-0-0-

Basil however wasn't as lucky, the disease had progressed to delirium, high fever and bleeding, the skin blackening as it died. He took three days to die. The body was carried away at night when there was no one around. The body, cot, bedding and bandages used by Gaius were soaked in liquid animal fat and burned until nothing but ash remained which was buried deep in the ground.

Gaius now had only one seriously ill knight to watch over. Sir Alan's care didn't end positively either. He died on his fifth day of illness. As sad as it was, Gaius saw it in a positive light, no further illness had been reported and the others who had been isolated were allowed to return to their own chambers.

The king's council convened and it was decided upon Gaius's recommendation that the quarantines continue for a further seven days. No pages, squires, knights or their family members had fallen ill. No one had caught the disease.

Yuletide had passed practically unnoticed…

-0-0-

Arthur never felt that he slept as soundly if Merlin was not with him. For the last fortnight, he had been sleeping with an ear open, awaiting news from Gaius. Things had calmed down considerably but he was still without Merlin and deep down felt rotten and unappreciated. Early one morning, he was disturbed by a sound in the antechamber but he knew that it was locked so he attributed it to one of the annoying rats, the bane of castle life.

He turned over and thought of Merlin knowing that soon he would return to their chamber once Gaius was certain that all traces of whatever the disease had been were gone. Merlin stood in the shadow of the bed curtains and looked down at Arthur. He had pleaded and cajoled with Gaius to be allowed to visit him. He hadn't been near him since the evening Sir Basil had been taken sick, three weeks ago.

He had seen him once from one of the windows in the tower and he had contained the overwhelmingly desire to yell and wave at him. It would have accomplished nothing. Matthew had on various occasions left missives on the stairs and once he was gone, Merlin would go down and pick them up.

One day, Merlin came breezing into Gaius's chambers having already visited the knights in isolation, who had informed him that they were going stare-crazy and intended to mutiny unless Gaius released them soon. "You look happier than usual," Gaius commented, "What happened?"

"I got a note from Arthur."

"See, I told you he wouldn't have forgotten you, he was probably moping around with as long face as you have been."

"When can I go to him, Gaius? No one has come down with anything for ten days. The castle population according to Arthur's note is doing well. Couldn't I at least see him? I won't touch him and then I'd come right back here. I promise."

"Merlin, what you are asking me is serious…if you think, that you could visit Arthur and have no physical contact, not even touching his hands then go…but promise me no contact."

Merlin remained in the shadow of the bed curtains and looked down at Arthur. He knew that he wasn't sleeping deeply but didn't want to wake him. It would make it hard to keep his promise to Gaius.

His eyes shifted to the fire, it needed a couple of more logs. Whispering, "_Silentium!" _he crossed to the hearth and put on some logs, holding out his hand, the logs caught and the room brightened. He returned to his place near the bed.

Arthur suddenly opened his eyes and saw him, he made to get out of bed but Merlin stopped him. "Please, you can't touch me, Arthur! Stay where you are. I just had to come to see that you were all right…"

"I thought you were a rat."

"Charming!"

"I missed you so much. I think Gawaine was going out of his mind listening to me complain about not being able to see you. Matthew saw you but I couldn't. Honestly, Merlin, it's been hell."

"But, you are alive and well, we will soon be together. Gaius is very positive as with no further cases, it seems that whatever it was that killed Basil and Alan went no further. I would not have wished such a death on my enemies. They suffered so much and even Gaius's potions to keep them unconscious didn't seem to work as they just writhed and moaned regardless. I pray that the rumours we have heard of it being rampant in other cities is an over exaggeration."

"Sit beside me, Merlin."

"I can't get that close, Arthur. I promised Gaius. When I can return here for good, I will have a long luxurious bath…"

"I'll act like your manservant and prepare all the bath sheets, oils and soaps. I'll even light the fires to heat the water."

Merlin smiled, "I think we could allow Thomas to do that don't you?"

"Then, I'll take over and look after you…"

"…then, when I'm all nice and clean, I'll cling to you like a limpet for the next five days…that is if you will still want me."

Arthur swung his feet over the edge of the bed and Merlin backed away, "Still want you…? Merlin, I will never let you out of my sight after that." With tears on his cheeks, Arthur pleaded, "Merlin, please let me hold you."

Merlin backed further away, saying seriously, "Please, Arthur, get back into bed. Nothing you can say will make me change my mind."

Arthur reluctantly did as he was told and Merlin blew him a kiss and left. Arthur felt warm and safe, his eyes felt heavy and he fell into a sleep induced by the man who was now standing in the antechamber with his head in his hands.


	12. Chapter 12

**CHAPTER 12 : HOME THE CARER**

Arthur was busy all day. He had wanted to watch the knights' training before attending the council meeting. He put all his effort into keeping busy. It helped pass the time until Merlin came back that afternoon. Sitting waiting in their chamber, the minutes had become hours with hours becoming days.

He'd missed having Merlin beside him ever day. The nights were lonely, filled with worry not only of the disease threatening to reappear but also the prolonged absence of his best friend.

Arthur was strong and competent as a ruler but in his mind, the support received from Merlin increased both and with Merlin at his side he felt invincible. He gave him his time without any ties, his love without reservation and his trust unconditionally. When they were in private, Arthur felt of himself as the copy and Merlin as the original.

He sighed and yelled at Gawaine to put himself into it. "You're dilly-dallying around. Put your heart into it!"

Gawaine was heard to mutter, "Tomorrow, Lads, will be better. Merlin will have him in hand!"

Spenser who was standing next to Arthur smiled at Simon who had been partnered with Gawaine and who was now out of control laughing.

Arthur scowled, "I heard that, Gawaine. Be careful or you'll be practising here all night and you too, Simon." He turned to Spenser saying, "I saw that. Don't encourage them."

"Let's face it, Arthur, Gawaine's telling the truth. Life will be much better for you and us once Merlin is back. You've been a real ogre recently. Having Merlin back will be good for you."

"One day, Spenser, when you meet the woman of your dreams it will all make sense. Come on, the council awaits us." Arthur turned on his heel to return to the castle, Spenser looked over his shoulder smiling at Simon and Gawaine who were half-heartedly sparring.

-0-0-

Merlin made his way through the hallways to the royal floor. It felt good to be up there again. He opened the door letting himself into the chambers. Thomas was waiting for him.

"The squire brought your message. The water is heated and everything ready for you. I put extra logs on the fire and have laid out a snack on the sideboard. The king should be back for lunch and he will as you requested be dining alone. Is there anything else, I can get you?"

"No, thank you. Everything sounds perfect…treat yourself to a well deserved day, well half day off. See you tomorrow morning."

Thomas smiled; his wife would be pleased to see him home early, "Thank you, Sir!"

"Merlin, Thomas…my name's Merlin!

"Thank you, Merlin!" said a smiling Thomas before leaving.

Merlin heard him lock the antechamber exterior door and thought all the more fun as Arthur would have to use his key to unlock it or knock if he'd left it somewhere.

Stripping off, Merlin smiled at the clothes which Thomas had left out for him, casual in-chamber clothes and nightwear. He wandered into the water closet. Thomas had already prepared the bath so Merlin just topped it up with more hot water. He felt really dirty, he'd washed everyday but the idea of a proper soaking appealed to him. He decided he might even have the luxury of refilling the tub for a second soaking once he was clean. He poured lavender oil into the water, swishing his hand around; the water temperature was about right. He slipped in, lying still allowing the heat to penetrate his bones. He then gave himself a good scrub. He washed his hair and bent over the edge of the bath to get a pitcher that had been full of water and upended it over his head. Feeling surprised at the effect a clean head of hair had on a person.

"_In dolium aqua calida exhaurient et implete eam_._" _Merlin felt the change in water and when he looked down it was sparkling clean and still the correct temperature. He lay there until he realised he was bored. He laughed as he thought, 'Time spent alone in a bath seems to drag.' He reached for a bath sheet and wrapped it around himself, at the same time, he heard footsteps in the antechamber…the door opened and Arthur stood there.

The look on his face was priceless; he seemed to become younger as the pressure of being alone was lifted from his heart and mind. His seemed to stand taller and his shoulders relaxed. A smile broke across his face and he said, "Merlin!"

Suddenly for some reason Merlin felt shy. Vivid thoughts were running through his head and glancing at Arthur he felt that he had the same ideas. He blushed slightly as Arthur strode toward him saying, "Masquerading as a Roman emperor, are we?"

"No, I just got out of the bath. I was on my way to the fire to dry myself in the warmth."

"You have no shoes on, come here." Arthur put his arm around his waist and Merlin felt himself being lifted up, carried across the room to be deposited still wrapped in the big bath sheet on their special chair in front of the fire. "I presume Thomas built up the fire and laid out your clothes?" Merlin nodded and Arthur said in a very sexy whisper, "Well, I don't think you'll be in too much of a hurry to get into them will you?"

-0-0-

As the room grew progressively darker, Arthur smiled. He had Merlin back, everything was right with the world. Merlin was lying beside him with his still damp head on Arthur's outstretched arm. "I missed you!"

"Arthur I couldn't stop thinking that if the disease was carried further into the castle all the knights would die…"

"You worried about the knights? What about me?"

Merlin gave him a friendly nudge in his side, "I couldn't even bear to think that I might lose you. I watched Basil and then Alan die. Arthur, they suffered. Once Gaius knew that there was no hope for them, he kept them deeply sedated to relieve their pain. All I could think of wereothers who had been conscious right until the bitter end. We were blessed that Basil's illness was caught so quickly. Alan must have had it before he returned to the castle and obviously Marcus' illness was not the same. It's a miracle that neither Gaius nor I came down with anything."

Arthur felt that a hug was needed to convince Merlin that he knew what he had gone through.

Merlin nestled in his arms before continuing. "Gaius says that one day, this type of illness will become widespread and he sees entire towns with thousand upon thousands of people, even kingdoms being decimated. He said that it might be years or even centuries but that it would happen. We were lucky to have only two patients, imagine if there had been more than a hundred, there would have been no place to keep them. Only the very generous and brave would be willing to look after them as in most cases the carers would also die. The disease would have spread and the old and feeble would have been the first to go followed by the young especially babies. I thought of Romney's and Mattie's Rupert and it just made me sick. I then focused on Treva and Gaius got quite cross saying that letting my mind dwell upon what might have been, wasn't good. I needed to dwell only in the present. Arthur, I was frightened and you weren't there to tell me that I was being an idiot." Arthur tightened his hold on him.

"So, I decided to think about what would be and I thought of you and the ways you can make me forget practically everything except that is, that I love you so much. Please, Arthur, let me show you again."

Later, Arthur lay with a sleeping Merlin in his arms. Would what Gaius had said actually come to fruition? He knew that disease spread faster in the towns and villages than it did in the open country or in the confines of a large castle with fewer residents. Maybe living cheek to jowl had something to do with it. One day, he would speak to Gaius about it and make plans. He'd worked so hard for his kingdom that thinking of it destroyed by an illness was hard to accept.

Merlin stirred and Arthur glanced down at him and smiled. A cold dread went through his heart if Merlin insisted on helping Gaius maybe next time, he would come down with the disease and die. He involuntarily hugged him to him and woke him up.

"Arthur, you're squeezing the life out of me." His stomach growled and he said, "Aren't you hungry?"

"Only for you!"

"Well, I'm ravenous. What time is it? I haven't eaten since breakfast. Thomas left some food on the sideboard. You stay here and I'll go and get it."

"Wrap something around you, you'll be cold and put on some shoes. I'll put more wood on the fire and we can eat in front of it." Arthur then padded to the armoire and got their dressing robes. Merlin pulled a low table over and put the food on it. There was bread, cold meats and fish, cheese and some stewed fruit. In a small cauldron, there was a thick soup so Merlin put the whole container onto the embers to warm it up.

"Thomas did us proud…" said Arthur.

"A feast fit for a king!" said Merlin with a sly grin.

Warm and well fed, they leaned back and gazed at the fire. Merlin finally said, "Did I miss anything in particular?"

"Nothing apart from some questionable remarks from your friend Gawaine when he heard that you were going to be back among the living…sorry, that sounded callous but you know what I meant."

"What did he say?" Arthur told him and Merlin grinned saying, "No flies on him! He calls it as he sees it. But seriously, once everything is back to normal will there be a memorial ceremony for Basil and Alan?"

"Yes, to begin with we'll toast them as deceased Knights of Camelot at our next banquet but I intend to invite their families to visit over the summer and we can do something special. They died as a result of working as knights of Camelot, they deserve to be remembered in a special way."

But that never came to pass as Basil's family had been wiped out by the same disease which Basil and Alan had brought to Camelot. Alan's brother the young Sir Brynn took time off to visit his elderly father and to return to him Alan's sword which had been a family heirloom and which his father in return gave to him as the surviving son.

The news coming from cities which had had the illness was dire, hundreds dead and families wiped out. For the longest time, the disease was foremost in Arthur's mind. Merlin asked Gaius to speak to him and he was able when encouraged by Gaius to let the past lie undisturbed and think of the present. Arthur then only ever referred to it as _that_ winter.

-0-0-

The spirits of the castle residents was picking up. The winter had been mild and already the earliest of wild flowers were sending up their greenery in the ditches alongside the roads. Windows were open and fresh air was flooding into the castle which had been closed since mid November. Maids were busy starting the seasonal cleaning and thoughts of relocating their bedchamber returned to Merlin and Arthur.

They had visited their new chambers and everything was progressing according to plan. The bedchamber was ready for its occupants. The royal bed was the original. The headboard, posters and wooden canopy had been given a thorough cleaning and the ropes and wood slates to support the mattress had been replaced.

A new horsehair mattress was in place but the upper mattress of down and fleece was not yet present. The bed furnishings, curtains and covers had also been replaced. Merlin had the tendency to giggle when he thought of the look on Uthur's face if he had had been privileged to the fact that a formerly loathed servant boy would be actually sleeping in his bed.

Arthur caught him at it and said, "Merlin, grow up! Think about it. Where else would you sleep?"

"…on a pull out trundle bed or maybe in the manservant's room."

"Remember 'wither thou goest' and as I have no intention of sleeping on a trundle or in the manservant's quarters, it's the king's bed or nothing…"

Merlin looked at the most important person in his life and said, "King's bed it is then!"

Once inside the antechamber, the door directly opposite led to the royal manservant's chamber large enough to have a fair sized bed and adequate space for a chest, table and chair. Pegs on the wall provided space to store clothes. Thomas had his own chambers in the married staff quarters so if needed the space would be used for storage or as Arthur assured Merlin somewhere he could sleep when he was not in the king's favour.

He retaliated with, "Well, it might be handy should I decide to entertain one night!"

"Merlin, any entertaining you will be doing will be with me…"

"But you never know, I might decide I was ready for a change…some young blood."

"Anyone in particular?"

Merlin grinned, no one appealed to him as Arthur did but he wasn't going to let on, so he said off hand, "Ask me later tonight and I might tell you."

Arthur punched him in the shoulder and they continued checking the area.

A corridor led off to the right; off it were doors to various chambers. Arthur's private dining room was ready for them. Besides its door from the interior hallway, it had its own staff door off the main antechamber, allowing the staff direct access to the room without going further into the royal chambers. It could easily seat ten but six or less would be the normal number of guests.

The remainder of the doors led to a meeting room, a sitting room with a large table where Arthur could work and a large bed chamber overlooking the courtyard. Across the end of the apartments was the extended solar and an extra bedchamber.

The meeting room was ready and Arthur's sitting room and his work area only lacked his current parchments, reference books and personal mementos.

Arthur stood in the bedchamber and surveyed it. He reached out and pulled Merlin closer to him. "Is there anything which is not to your liking beside the bed?"

Shaking his head, Merlin said, "No everything is just perfect. The room is bright and airy and even the bed looks less imposing when you're beside me."

"We have a reputation to uphold," so saying Arthur pulled Merlin around and smartly depositing him on the horsehair mattress. He smiled down at him saying, "Don't move, I'll lock the door."

But Merlin did move, the mattress was pricking his back, "I need a blanket of something, it's too itchy."

"Honestly, Merlin, you would never think that we were used to making the best of what was available. Come here, at least we can sit on the bench in front of the hearth and have a good cuddle."

Merlin smiled; deep down it was not only the scratching from the rough horsehair mattress which had been bothering him. He was still not sure about the damned bed. "Arthur's there's no fire and it is still chilly in here. Let's continue checking everything and then we can return to our own chamber."

"You're blushing...I do believe that you are having second thoughts. Come here, everything will be all right even with Uther glaring over my shoulder when we make love."

Merlin shoved Arthur away and then the two of them collapsed laughing on the upholstered bench. Arthur whispered, "You have nothing to worry about, I'll take care of you. I'll be gentle and loving." Merlin grinned at him and putting his arms around his neck, pulled Arthur closer to him.

They continued checking subsequent rooms and Merlin demanded a kiss in each room as a toll, finally deciding that the solar was going to be his favourite room.

Arthur said, "Maybe we should have a cot in the corner, just in case…"

"In case…what? …don't bother I got it! Anyway, how would we explain that to your friends?"

"Knowing you, it probably wouldn't surprise any of them." Merlin gave him the raised eyebrow but Arthur continued, "We might start a fashion, comfy soft furniture in sitting rooms. I bet that would appeal to a lot of people. Just think, on bright sunny afternoons we could recline on the bed admiring the sky and the tops of the trees."

"Then if that is what you want we could relocate the bedchamber in here."

"What and be woken up every morning by the sun? I don't think so!"

"But you have to get up anyway, so what's the difference?"

"I prefer waking in a dimly lit room, slowly letting my eyes become accustomed to the light, knowing that the solid lump beside me is you."

"Times must be bad if you have now demoted me to a lump!"

Arthur laughed, "You, Merlin, are the most lovable lump in the whole world and one I am only too willing to awaken to each day."

"Sire, your flattery exceeds even you!" said Merlin wrapping his arms around Arthur and holding him close. He thought back to the day he had come to Camelot, never had he expected to have anything to do with the king…and now. He smiled chuckling.

Arthur felt the chuckles saying, "What's so funny?"

"Life," said Merlin putting his finger under Arthur's chin and tipped his head back so that he could give him a kiss.

Merlin did a final sweep of the chambers before joining Arthur in the antechamber, "Everything is as it should be. Let's get back, I'm ready to move." They walked side by side along the corridor, "There's nothing to worry about. Let Thomas take care of everything. He'll have other servants to help. Now, that I've seen it again, I want to be there."

Arthur grinned, he liked it when Merlin took charge which he often did in their private lives. "Very well, you go ahead and speak with Thomas and I'll let Humphrey know that we're ready to move."

-0-0-

They were approached by senior squire. "Your Majesty, Sir Leon asked that I give you this and wait for a reply."

Arthur took the message and read it. Handing it over to Merlin, he said to the squire, "Cadmus, isn't it?" The squire bowed nodding. "Return to Sir Leon to tell him, I'll see him immediately in my chamber. Then come back as well as I'll need you."

The squire bowed smartly, "Sire!" he said, turned and left the way he'd come.

When he was out of earshot, Merlin commented "What do you make of it?"

"It seems improbable."

"How did they get this close without being apprehended? Where are the lookouts? Surely, you should have been notified?"

They had reached their chambers. Merlin was upset, he had dealt with slave traders before. They ruined the lives of the families who lost children regardless of their age. They disrupted the running of the villages often leaving abandoned farmland in their wake as broken families failed to survive. They were the most despicable of bandits as they had no respect for their captives.

Young men were needed in other kingdoms for mining and agriculture, the former extracted a heavy cost on lives. The demand was there and as to the supply, some people felt that it was fare game to steal and sell boys. Ages could be from nine year old to the late teens. Some never completed the journey to their destination, due to injuries sustained in their capture or accidents along the way. The villages were hit double fold, their young sons were removed and in many cases, fathers defending them were also taken or killed. Women died defending their older children. This resulted in other younger children being left orphans and in villages where there was hardly any food to go around, their lives were less than ideal. An abandoned three year old had little chance of surviving unless it was taken in by another family.

In rare cases the boys were saved. Those seen as too weak to work or injured and not worth saving were abandoned. Some managing to find other villages where they were taken in by caring people and some even lucky enough to make their ways back home. However, many didn't…

For Merlin, closer to home was the situation which had faced Treva. He knew that this wasn't the same but three children of a family had been killed along with their parents leaving Treva as the sole survivor. The boy had experienced physical pain and mental anguish. Merlin thought that life was hard enough without having strangers separate you from your family.

Arthur grabbed a map and threw it on the table. He put an inkwell and a dagger to hold it down. He poured over it finally stabbing an area with his finger. The area was forested well within the boundaries of Camelot and too close for comfort.

"Someone let down the side," he said. "Look, Wickfield is here and there's the Roman bridge, the road leads through Hazelwood, surely someone would have raised the alarm.

Thomas knocked walked in, "Sire, Sir Leon is here."

"Send him in and tell Cadmus to notify Sirs Spenser, Gawaine, Simon, Romney, Aislin and Rook that we are eating here tonight. Notify the kitchen as well."

Thomas bowed and left. He met with Cadmus in the antechamber and together they left to notify Arthur's knights.

Arthur sat at the table motioning for Leon to join him. "What the hell happened? Are the reports documented? The reported death toll is huge and what about the rumours that the bandits are still in the area?"

"First, Arthur, the reports are true. Survivors started arriving in Wickfield and immediately the town council sent messengers on to Hazelwood. From there the news was picked up by one of the guard outposts and news came to us while the guards went immediately to the area of conflict sending back official reports."

"The bandits were surrounded but they outnumbered the guards who had heavy fatalities. These bandits are well armed and experienced." Arthur nodded but Leon wasn't finished, "But we have another problem, a group of squires with accompanying knights is also in the area…"


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13 : A TREE SHOULD LOOK LIKE A TREE**

Leon had said that a group of squires with accompanying knights were also in the area… Merlin's head snapped up, memories suddenly coming to the fore. Two knights and four squires but only one surviving squire making it back to Camelot.

Arthur glanced at him knowing where he was and what he was reliving. He could do nothing at the moment. He turned to Leon, "Has there been any contact with them?"

"Not yet but we are hopeful. They are well trained boys and the knights Sir Tomas and Sir Caedrik are experienced and certainly not foolhardy. They'd put the safety of their charges first."

"Which year are the squires?"

"Two are senior squires and the other four are fifteen year olds and on their first extended mission. The plan was a five day outing returning today but so far no news. Now they might have just been delayed or..."

Merlin had visions of the knights being killed and the squires captured. They were strong, educated and worth a lot of money to the right person. He'd heard of men returning from overseas years later, telling of having been captured and traded. However, he also knew that the mortality rate was high within the first days. Children too young or weak were often abandoned. Those stronger were often treated in a loathsome manner. They reached their destinations broken not only in body but also in spirit. His mind came back to the present as Arthur was still talking.

"We won't entertain that for a moment. Alert the guards that they will be leaving tomorrow for the area around Wickfield. Make sure they have all possible reports and know that knights and squires may be in the vicinity. Put emphasis on that, as I would prefer they make that their primary mission. The slavers are probably well gone."

He stood striding to the window and looked over the courtyard. "Merlin, go and see the Squire Master. I want names and what plans were in place. There must be some information of their itinerary. Even if the squires believe that they were just out traipsing at leisure, free to go where they wished, we know that's not how squire outings work. They will be in a set area, working on various exercises."

Merlin nodded, turning to leave, Arthur walked him to the antechamber door saying, "Since that fateful outing with Daffyd, there have been hundreds of outings and everyone has returned safely." He put his arm across his shoulder saying, "Chin up, we'll find them and those damned slavers to boot."

-0-0-

Supper was intense; Leon had been able to give everyone a current update on the situation. The meal was over and still they sat at the table talking. The staff had removed everything save the goblets and pitchers of wine and mead. Thomas stood unobtrusively at the wall awaiting further instructions.

The final decision was that Arthur would take part in the mission. He would be visible to all villagers and families which had lost children. The visits would return their confidence in the kingdom. Financial aid would be available for affected villages. Although Camelot couldn't rebuild families, it could repair infrastructure such as damaged building and replace livestock.

A second mission lead by Gawaine would track down the squires. He had requested Merlin for this mission and Arthur had agreed. They wanted if possible to get in, find the boys and get them out without any problems.

Squires were integral to as well as valued members of castle life. Two senior ones were within a year of being invested to the knighthood. As all squires were under the protection of the king, Arthur needed them found...safe and sound.

Arthur would be backed by Leon, Spenser, Romney, Simon, Aislin and Rook with a contingent of guards. Gawaine would have Merlin and Sir Gavin who had been the sole survivor of that ill-fated squires outing many years ago. They would only travel with the basics and once the squires were found, Gawaine and Merlin could safely turn their hands to supporting Arthur's mission while Gavin could accompany the others back to Camelot .

-0-0-

Merlin had Arthur up early. He had a good breakfast and then was dressed. He sat at his desk studying the maps and waiting for the appointed time to leave.

Leon joined him. They would spend one night on the road and then should arrive close to the area where the slavers had been reported. He and Leon had differing ideas of the directions which the bandits would have moved but nothing could be decided until they had spoken to the local guards. A group of mounted men with heavy wagons would make distinct trails if they rode off the main trails and through the forest. Leon thought, 'Time will tell.'

Merlin got dressed and approached the table. Arthur look up, "Good heavens! What have we got here? Robin Hood!"

Ignoring Arthur, Merlin lugged the pack which Gaius had prepared for him behind him. "I'm going as a servant."

"Are you supposed to be in disguise? You look like a blooming tree…"

"Thank you, Arthur, I will take that into consideration as I make myself inconspicuous in the forest. There are if you hadn't realised it, many fir trees in the area and I think I'll blend in very nicely."

"Blend in…you'll look more like the fairy on the top of a Christmas tree."

"Very funny! When I come back unscathed, I'll make you eat those words…"

Arthur shrugged, "Who's Gawaine going as Father Christmas?"

Leon smiled. The two of them were very funny and he did think that Merlin had maybe overdone the green a little but he had to concede next to a fir tree, he might blend in admirably.

"You're not riding Iago dressed like that."

"For all Iago cares, I could ride him naked…"

"Don't tempt me, Merlin. I'm serious Iago is a quality horse and if you are supposed to be a servant, you would be over-horsed. Take one of the others…it'll blend into fir trees better." Arthur thought he was hilarious and burst out laughing clapping Leon on the back as he had also smiled.

Merlin scowled at him and hoisting the supplies and his bedroll on his back and muttering, "I'll be back, got to find myself an inconspicuous horse for my trip," he left the chamber.

Leon said, "Maybe that was a little harsh, Sire. I know that he would rather be in our group."

"Don't worry, he'll be safe with Gawaine." Arthur then said with a big smile, "I'll half apologise before we leave." Leon grinned the two of them were a mystery unto themselves. However, the apology never happened…

The horses were waiting in the courtyard, Mulgan stood with the king's supplies and bedroll attached to his saddle. Arthur swept down the stairs with his knights, Merlin at his elbow. He smiled turning to him and said, "Merlin about before I…" They were interrupted by clattering hooves as a messenger cantered into the courtyard, pulling his horse up before Arthur and handing him a missive.

Arthur read it, handed it to Leon and said, "Mount up!" The knights did as directed and streamed across the courtyard at a smart trot. They rode through the portcullis joined by guards as they passed their stables.

-0-0-

Gawaine appeared later leading two non-descript horses, "Nice outfit, Merlin. Was it on sale?" Merlin scowled at him and looked at the two horses as Gawaine said, "Arthur left word that these are to be our mounts."

"Like hell they are! If I need to trust a horse to make a quick decision I need Iago, he's already saddled. Take Hazlit, Arthur doesn't have to know and he can't stop us taking our own horses."

Finally, the group was ready to move out. It consisted of Sirs Gawaine and Gavin, a guard and Merlin. All dressed in non-Camelot outfits. They looked like two merchants accompanied by a rather green servant and a groom.

Gawaine knew roughly where the squires and their knights had been going. They could easily be in a twenty mile radius but he knew that it was a training exercise and that caves and cliffs were to be involved. They rode without delay and within two days were in the general area. They had been able to put up in inns where they had continued the masquerade. Knowing that the group would have had to buy supplies and that both Tomas and Caedrick would have been in Camelot red, they spent time in markets picking up clues and finally had come as close as their campground from a couple of days ago.

Merlin assured them that the eight horses were still travelling together but suddenly just before they turned in for the night, four horses had left the group and entered the woods. He dismounted and checked the ground. "Gawaine. they have separated. You continue on the path and I'll follow this trail through the woods."

"Not alone!" insisted Gawaine.

"I'm dressed like a tree for heaven's sake," Merlin added with a grin. "I'll blend in beautifully. I'll only go in a couple of miles and then I'll come to follow you. Leave a sign if you go off-trail to camp."

Gawaine had his misgivings but Gavin said that Merlin wouldn't to anything stupid, "Would he?" he'd said glaring at Merlin.

Merlin promised that he'd be careful, then he and Iago left the path to follow the disturbed ground of the forest.

-0-0-

Arthur's group was not making such good time. Each village they entered was loathe to allow the king to leave without some food and recognition. He wished now that he had gone with Gawaine's group yet he couldn't blame the villages as he was their monarch as much as he was to the townsfolk of Camelot itself. He listened to their problems and with Simon taking notes, promised to see what he might do for them.

Three days out and they had only covered a half of their expected distance. Leon and Arthur sat to discuss it. Leon suggested that the visits were important to the residents of the towns and villages so they should proceed as they were but maybe planning a route with less large villages. It was also decided to send on the guards so they could be more involved in the actual search than babysitting the king and a handful of knights.

Arthur had laughed, "Hard to hide five knights, a couple of squires and accompanying guards."

The further they got to their destination the more rumours were heard. Wickstead had been razed. The slavers obviously annoyed with the lack of suitable captives had lit fire to all the thatches and the majority of the village had burned. Fatalities had been high among the men of the village. Slowly they continued, reaching Hazelwood to meet the guards who had been first on site. They also had with them a couple of witnesses, homeless and widowed.

The women were able to give detailed accounts of what had happened. At least a dozen men had been in the raiding party with two large covered wagons and two other open ones, one full of grain and other loot. Four children had been stolen from the village but they were sure that there were more children in the wagons.

Leon took the leader of the guards on one side and asked if he had heard rumours of any other Camelot knights in the region. He shook his head, so Leon explained that there was possibly a group of knights and squires on a training exercise in the area. He told him to spread the word among the guards as they now had a double mission.

Upon reaching Wickfield, the damage to property was evident. The village was practically deserted save for a few men trying to clear away rubble. New graves had been added to the cemetery next to the village. Arthur dismounted and the men came over to him. Life was hard enough without having this added burden placed on their shoulders. He told them that they would be receiving whatever they needed to rebuilt. Grain and livestock which had been stolen or destroyed would be replaced.

Arthur took the time to convince them that all villages were important to the kingdom. One teenager who had witnessed everything from the woods where he was watching the pigs who were foraging, was able to say that the men came from the east and left to the north. He had also heard their voices and they sounded different from men of this area. One wagon certainly had occupants but he could give nothing beyond that. The village only had one work horse and it had been tied to the back of one of the wagons and taken away. Asked if he had lost anyone, he dropped his head then glancing at the newly dug graves and said, "My father died and my thirteen year old brother was taken."

Leon prompted, "…and you mother?"

"She escaped with my other brothers and is now with her family in Plodtown. I don't see her returning here as she is better with her sister's family."

Leon nodded. This was one of the problems; villages attacked often lost the surviving members especially if the bread-winner was killed. He smiled at the young man saying, "Maybe once the cottage is built and the crops resown, they will return. Keep looking after the pigs as they will be food for you next winter.

The group sat around a campfire that night. They had travelled close to ten miles following the obvious trail of the wagons. At one fork in the road, they realised that the wagons had parted company however, as it was late, Arthur called it a day. They would decide what to do about the divided trail over supper.

-0-0-

Merlin carefully followed the trail looking out for any clues which might help. He found some red material caught on a thorn bush and recognised it as coming from a knight's cloak. The squires would all be dressed in brown. He reached the top of a hill and carefully studied the valley below. On a ridge across the valley, he picked up smoke possibly from a campfire.

It was too late in the day to make the crossing, so he cut a notch in a tree and returned the way he had come.

It was dusk when he finally saw the mark left by the others and followed them into the bush. He was glad to see a campfire.

"Any luck?" said Gawaine rising to meet him as the guard came and took Iago from him.

"Possibly, I reached a valley and on the ridge opposite I could see the smoke from a campfire. It was too far to pick out colours…however," putting his hand in his pocket, he pulled out the remnant of fabric. "I found this, so I think it would be worth continuing the trail tomorrow. Did you pick up anything?" Gawaine shook his head.

Gavin handed Merlin a plate of stew which he ate hungrily. It had been a long day. He checked that Iago had been fed and watered then wrapping himself in his bedroll, propped himself against a sandy bank. He was soon asleep.

Gawaine's mind was racing; he couldn't sleep so he decided tomorrow they would split up. Gavin and the guard would follow the main track while he and Merlin would backtrack to the forest trail, cross the valley and scan the next ridge. Once it was light enough, he pulled out the maps and it was decided that they would meet in the village of Oxslip in two days. They split their supplies and following something to eat, set off.

-0-0-

Arthur's plan on seeing the trail separate was to do the same with the men accompanying him. Leon would lead the other group. Next morning, the two groups set off separately. Arthur's group faced hilly terrain with light forests while Leon's group plunged into heavily forested but comparatively flat land. The men were told to keep a watch for anything which might be tied in with either the captured children or the slave traders.

Leon, Romney and Rook had been gone maybe three hours when at a ford, Rook had noticed something caught in the reeds and floating in the water like a flag. He dismounted and retrieved a child's sodden vest. He passed it to Leon who said, "Let's see if we can find the child to whom this belongs."

"So many days have passed, do you think that they are still in the area. If they have heavy wagons this trail is going to take them time." He was right as further along they found an area where trees had to be felled to get the wagons through.

"It would have made more sense to have kept to the road," said Rook.

"But maybe this is the best cross country route. Words passes quickly even in this forsaken area so maybe with a full wagon, they wanted to stay off travelled roads."

Their first real evidence was when their arrival frightened a flock of crows. Romney offered to check for anything unusual. He returned within five minutes. "It's the body of a child of maybe ten, badly beaten even before the crows got at him. It's futile returning the body."

Leon said, "We'll take a break and bury him here."

It was while they were cleaning an area in which to place the child that Romney said, "Shh!" They stood still absorbing all the noises of the forest. "There it is again…it probably nothing but I'm going to check it out."

Leon nodded and Romney walked in the direction from which he had heard the sound. He hunted around but found nothing. He leaned against a tree and waited, again the sound assailed his ears. He quietly walked towards it and almost walked past the body of another boy. He was alive, tied to a tree. He pleaded with the knight not to kill him, promising that he would never try to attack any of the other men.

Romney shushed him and untied his arms. One of the boy's legs was broken and his face had been badly beaten. He started to sob, "They pushed him out of the cart and left him there, they wouldn't let me stay with him and I fought and one man hit me while the other stood on my leg. I heard it crack and then they threw me out of the wagon laughing and one said, 'Let's see how well you now help your friend!' as the other tied me to the tree."

Romney was now kneeling beside the child. He said, "You're safe now. I'm going to get my friends and we'll take care of you. What's your name? "

The boy seemed incapable of thinking in the present. He said, "Don't leave. I can't stay here alone any longer. I heard foxes and crows…they are just waiting for me to die."

"I don't intend to leave you, let's see if they can hear me if I whistle," Romney put two fingers in his mouth and whistled loudly. The two of them remained quiet and he recognised Leon's whistle. He called out, "Over here!" Within no time, two more knights joined him.

The un-named boy's eyes almost popped out of his head, He was surrounded by red. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he thought, 'Mother, I'm coming home!' and promptly fainted.

Taking advantage of his unconscious state, Rook straightened out his leg and bound it and his good one to a straight thick branch.

Leon said, "We'll camp here, he's in no condition to move and it's already getting late. Rook offered to go back and get the three horses, watering them at a stream on the way over.

-0-0-

The two sets of squires were setting out for a rendezvous; each group making their way to a cliffy prominence but from different directions. The squires were in charge but a knight for safety reasons accompanied each group. The senior squire was the leader but it was a joint effort to follow the directions. If everything went according to plan, they would be coming from different sides of the escarpment. If Tomas and Caedrik had reckoned correctly, they should arrive late afternoon, spend a night in the caves and then start the journey back to Camelot.

Rhylan's group left first, they had certain objectives to meet and directions to follow. First they had to find water and then turn north. After maybe an hour's riding they came upon a quick flowing stream. They decided to follow it against the current and came upon a waterfall. Deciding that this was the water feature they turned north as directed.

The next stage was to find a soft ride. As a marsh came into view they knew they were on the right track. The third clue was a gorge. One of the boys said, "This ground is too wet. Maybe we should be looking for a track leading to higher ground."

They were busy trotting along when they met another path that looked as if some inexperienced farmer had been ploughing. They stopped and looked at it. Checking the map a squire called John said that it looked as if this wouldnbe where they should be turning. "Wagon ruts and quite a few of them. Why would heavily laden wagons be going cross country? This would be really hard work for the horses. Look at the depth of the ruts."

Rhylin said, "Keep your eyes open! Something isn't right." He glanced at Sir Caedrik who was behind the boys and who beckoned him back and asked him to explain what he planned to do. "We'll advance cautiously and once we get to the gorge take a breath and have lunch. We can then really study the map as the Tor cannot be too far away.

The squires started off again; the track easily seen but difficult to manoeuvre. They reached the gorge and ate. It was quite spectacular terrain and the boys were looking forward to exploring it. Just as he was about to lead them into it, Rhylin couldn't help but glance back at the gouged track. He felt uncomfortable. He walked over to Caedrik and told him that he felt that they should go a little further on the main track. The knight asked him to explain himself, as he was in charge of the squires, "Sir, have you ever had a feeling that there is something that you will live to regret if you don't do it."

Caedrik nodded, "If you feel that way take the time to settle your mind. But you cannot, split your group. You have to keep with them. Today, I am only an observer."

"We will be continuing on the original path for a while." The boys greeted Rhylin's announcement with less than enthusiasm. They wanted to go through the gorge however, no one argued and they all followed the senior squire."


	14. Chapter 14

**CHAPTER 14 : BABES IN THE WOODS**

Gawaine and Merlin headed back to the area where Merlin had found the red fibres and had seen smoke across the valley. Iago and Hazlit were well matched and they covered the ground quickly. They soon traversed the valley and found the camp.

Merlin rooted around becoming more certain that it had been a Camelot camp. The number of horses was correct and the set up of the camp was in accordance with the training of Camelot knights. Gawaine was scuffing around and he found a buckle from a harness, "Over here! It's a buckle from one of the knight's saddles."

They mounted up and starting following the trail. Gawaine was surprised when within an hour, the horse tracks showed that a halt had been called. Merlin realised that the party had split with four riders going one way and the other four continuing along the trail.

Merlin looked up, "Split?"

Gawaine nodded, "If you find them, stay with them. They will possibly meet up to camp tonight. If so I'll follow the others in. When I explain what has happened, Caedrik and Tomas will probably agree to going to Oxslip so we can all meet up together."

"Left or right?"

"Your choice and, Merlin, be careful, Arthur will skin me alive if anything happens to you and I am rather partial to the hide I have…we've been together for many a year."

Merlin laughed, turned left allowing Iago to pick his own speed. It was a beautiful spring morning and although somewhere there was trouble, Merlin decided to enjoy the outing.

The trail was easy to follow: the riders had visited a waterfall. Merlin dismounted to allow Iago to have a drink. He laughed as once the horse had its fill, he started flicking the water up with his nose and then started pawing at it. Merlin remounted and got back on the trail. He too was surprised to see the torn up earth. Obviously, heavy wagons had passed through. He checked around and saw that the most recent tracks were still those of the four horses.

-0-0-

About two hours ahead of him, Rhylin was leading his little group along the path. He noticed something in the undergrowth. He dismounted; it was the body of a youngish man, a labourer by his outfit and lying beside him, the body of a toddler. The other squires gathered around him. The man was dead but the baby looked as if it is sleeping. He picked it up and realised that it was asleep.

Caedrik stepped forward. "Let me look at it." Without relinquishing it, Rhylin let the knight check out the child.

One of the squires said, "Sir, do you think they were lost? Maybe the mother is around somewhere."

Sir Caedrik shook, his head, "I haven't a clue. Search this immediate area but go no further than needed and keep an ear open for not only your fellow squires but also any other unusual sounds." He was mystified, it was possible that the man had been going to visit someone and had the baby with him but it seemed improbable.

The toddler woke and started to cry looking up at the strange young man who held him. Rhylin hushed it and tilted it upright so its head lay on his shoulder. The sobbing continued, finally turning into hiccups as it hid its face in Rhylin's neck.

Caedrik and the rest of the squires returned having found nothing. One of the others said, "It's gone back to sleep."

"Can we now do the gorge?" said one of the boys called Ethan who having had plenty of experience with his baby brothers didn't find this toddler as fascinating as some of the others did.

Rhylan glanced at Sir Caedrik for guidance; the knight nodded assuming leadership of the party.

"I think we should continue on a little way. First get this body off the trail. His legs are mangled he might have been run over by a wagon." As he left to go with the squires, he continued, "Rhylin, if you want you can go back to the entrance of the gorge, we'll meet you there."

"No, Sir, I'll stay with the group, he hardly weighs anything but he is wet and not the sweetest smelling individual."

Caedrik smiled, "Good practise for you if you are ever left with your little nephew."

James one of the squires said, "But, Sir, I'm sure Sir Romney's Rupert smells better than this one."

They continued for another couple of miles but found nothing else out of the ordinary.

"Do you think the baby is hungry?" said Ethan who was riding next to Rhylin. "What are you going to feed it?"

"Probably something that we have left over from lunch."

"Well, I hope he likes, dried venison, bread and cider that's all that was left. None of those are good for a baby."

Rhylin said, "He has teeth. He could eat some bread soaked in apple cider until we find him some gruel."

"You're going to get him drunk and Sir Caedrik won't find that funny, but it would be…wouldn't it?" said Ethan with a broad grin. "I remember one of my little brothers was sitting on my father's knee and he reached for my father's goblet of mead and took a mouthful. He made the funniest faces and finished by spitting it out on the table. Mother smiled and said that we should excuse his table manners but we all thought it was really funny. He died the following winter when the flu went through the castle but I'll never forget him."

Caedrik had raised his arm and the group came to a stop, he called Rhylin forward. Once they had finished talking, Rhylin said, "Back to the gorge…"

-0-0-

Merlin reached the gorge; he could see that the riders had stopped. Realising that they had not ridden into the gorge, he decided to follow them along the torn up trail. Just as he swung around, he caught a glimpse of movement. It was no mistake as he now saw movement on the other side of the narrow gorge. Not knowing if it was bandits or just a trick of his imagination, he rode along the path as he had planned. Once he was out of sight, He dismounted and tied Iago to a tree telling him to be good, to stay where he'd left him and to be quiet.

He slipped into the undergrowth and made his way back to the gorge. Instead of entering between the boulders, he climbed along the top so that he could get an unimpeded view. He stayed quiet and then again was conscious of movement but it was out of his sight below him and then he heard whispering. He realised that the tone of the voice was too high for a man and figured it was a woman or a child. He retraced his steps and left his jacket with Iago. He then walked back to the entry of the gorge and listened.

Again he heard the whispering, he could make out more than one voice and it sounded like crying as well. He froze and listened carefully.

"Jed, I'm hungry and cold."

"We will wait, he has the little one and your mother wouldn't want us to leave him."

"I could walk through the gorge and find someone to come back and get you. I know I could! or I could go back to see if Walter is still there. The wagons have gone and you need help and anyway, I'm really hungry."

"I'm as hungry as you are and I would go back with you but I can't walk. Maybe you could pull me up and we could go together." Jed put out his hand but Lem wasn't strong enough to get him up. He stood in front of the older boy crying.

Merlin made his way through the entrance. He knew one boy couldn't move but if the other took off he might get lost. He wanted to get as many of the boys back to their villagers as possible. He walked quietly but not silently into the gorge, it was narrow and the sun hadn't penetrated the bottom so it was chilly and poorly lit. He picked out the boys before they did him and once he was close enough to them to grab the younger should he think of running, he said, "Hello! Are you lost?"

As he had expected the younger boy turned to look at him and then took off but Merlin was faster and swept him off his feet into his arms. The boy struggled but finally gave up and stopped. The older boy yelled at Merlin not to hurt him but quietened when he saw that he didn't intend to.

"We haven't done any harm. We won't try to run away again...what do you want with us?"

Merlin put the younger boy down beside the older one. The poor kid seemed to have lost any hope of escaping and covered his face with his arm and started to sob. Looking at the two of them, he realised that they had just about given up. He said, "I don't want anything from you. You don't look as if you could stand up let alone walk and your friend there is cold and hungry. Who are you and how did you end up so far away from your home?"

"We were taken by bad men and put in the big wagon. When the men saw that Lem had his little brother with him, they were angry and threw the baby onto the grass and went to drive on. When the men weren't looking, our friend Walter jumped off the far side of the wagon, to get him but there was a bump and he fell. The last thing we saw was that he was crawling towards the kid. Lem slid off trying to follow them and I tried to escape but my leg hit the wheel and was hurt. One of the men yelled at me but the other said to leave us as I would be no good to them and he didn't want the other wagon to get too far ahead. Then he added that no one counted numbers and we wouldn't be missed."

Lem had stopped crying and was peeking at Merlin from beneath his arm, nodding as Jed told the story.

"Well, if you, Lem, can show me where you last saw Walter maybe we can find them." He turned to the older boy, "You will have to stay here by yourself. Can you do that?" Jed nodded.

Merlin told Lem to follow him and started to walk out of the gorge. Suddenly he felt the boy's hand in his and he had a flash of Treva and gripping it tightly he said, "I won't let you go."

They passed Iago who called out to Merlin when he heard him talking to the boy. "That's my horse. He's strong enough to carry the three of us." Merlin crossed his fingers.

Never did they find Walter. "It was around here, somewhere," said Lem, "I remember that big boulder, Tommy almost landed on it."

Merlin and Lem searched but there was no trace of the baby or the man Walter. To keep Lem's mind on other things, Merlin questioned him, "How do you know Jed? Why did you have your brother with you and who is Walter?"

Lem explained that Jed lived in the cottage next door. He was looking after Tommy as his mother had a new baby. Lem whispered to him that it was a girl called Annie...and Walter was one of the older boys in the village. "I want my Mam!" he suddenly said.

Merlin wrapped an arm around his shoulder saying kindly, "How old are you?"

The boy stood as tall as he could and shook his head, "I don't know."

Merlin's comment that he thought that he was very brave and a big boy earned him a sad smile. "My Dad will be cross with me because I lost Tommy. He needs boys to help him work the…"

They both swung around as they heard hoofbeats. Merlin pulled him into the woods hoping that Iago would keep quiet. He glanced along the trail and was rewarded with a flash of red. He could hear voices and knew he'd met up with the squires.

Dragging Lem behind him, he stood in the middle of the trail smiling. Caedrik drew up to him saying, "God Almighty, Merlin! What are you doing in this forsaken area?"

The squires all dismounted and clustered around him and the young boy. Rhylin walked forward and Lem yelled out. "He has Tommy!" Then standing up to Rhylin he said, "That's my brother, you give him to me!"

The other squires smiled it was good to see a senior squire put in his place but such a little boy.

Rhylin went down on one knee and a sleepy toddler opened his eyes. "Tommy, it's me!" But the child was comfortable and warm with Rhylin so he just clung to him.

"He's all right. We found him on the trail."

"Is Walter with him?"

Rhylin shook his head.

-0-0-

Finally, they got organised. Sir Caedrik took Jed in front of him on his saddle. Merlin had checked him out and said that he was heavily bruised by his contact with the wheel but other than that he seemed fine. Lem wouldn't let go of Merlin's hand as he had suddenly become shy of all the squires, so he rode with Merlin and Rhylin still had Tommy.

Caedrik advised that they ride straight through the gorge and head for the Tor. No more side tracks, it was getting on and he wanted everyone at the final campsite before dark.

"Will there be food?" a little voice said.

Merlin smiled, "Yes, Lem, there will be food and a nice warm fire."

"Good!" said Lem as he snuggled into Merlin's green wool jacket and fell fast asleep.

At last they reached the hill and above them they could see the rock formation which was going to be their overnight campsite.

Merlin had brought Caedik up to date on the slave traders and the fact that Arthur and the others were in the general area. Mentioning that Gawaine was following Tomas's group had made Caedrik smile. "One of the bad things about travelling with squires is the lack of anything stronger than mild apple cider. Hope Gawaine is well equipped."

"He was," said Merlin, "Early this morning but who knows what he water skin holds at this moment."

They arrived at the base of the Tor and Merlin immediately set to making a fire having placed Jed and Lem against the stone. Rhylin decided that he could no longer take the smell of the baby and Ethan and he had walked to a stream and undressed him.

"The water is cold and he'll probably shriek but you should wash him before you do anything else."

Rhylan smiled, the squire had more knowledge of babies than he did so he was quite happy to have him along. Pulling up the little hoemespun dress Tommy wore, he collected some leaves and managed to give him a wash from the waist down.

Ethan came back with some moss and ferns, "We can use this instead of the rags."

Rhylan decided that he would prefer to have his tunic against himself so he left the baby sitting on the ground and using his knife cut part of his tunic to make something suitable. He hadn't a clue as he had never watched his sister-in-law Mattie or the servant girl take care of Rupert. Ethan wrapped some of the moss in the cloth and then wrapped it around the baby.

"There, that's better isn't it, Tommy? Nice and dry!" The baby looked up at him and smiled.

"Rhylin, if you don't decide to become a knight, you could be a nursemaid!" said Ethan with a big grin.

"Well, that's not going to happen!" said Rhylin. "Let's go back if we're lucky the others will have a fire started and maybe even have meal on its way."

-0-0-

The baby's face when he was offered food was priceless. The boys laughed as the taste of the cider soaked bread filled his mouth. The baby stopped eating and looked surprised and then up at Rhylin who was feeding him. Rhylin put another piece of bread into his mouth and said, "Good boy, Tommy!"

Caedrik came over and said that he should have used water instead. "But that wouldn't have been as funny," chimed in Lem.

Rhylin offered the baby a sip out of his waterskin but it didn't go well, so he held the toddler facing him and propped him against his knees and put a few drops into his mouth.

"How come you know what to do?" said Jed," Do you have a kid of your own?"

"No, certainly not!" said Rhylin laughing. "My brother has a little boy called Rupert." Rhylin picked up the baby and held him against his chest. "You're a good little lad…"

He handed the child to Lem who said, "He doesn't smell too bad now."

"Until next time…" said Ethan, the voice of wisdom. The others all had a good laugh.

-0-0-

Merlin had returned from the woods with three rabbits over his shoulder and looked over smiling, he felt confident that when the time came for Rhylin to meet his first son or daughter that he would be quite capable.

Movement could be heard in the woods to the south and soon two knights and two squires rode into view.

Ethan called to one of his friends, "Rhylin has a baby!"

"Me too!" Gawaine said smiling as he opened his cloak and to reveal a young boy in front of him on the saddle.

Tomas, not to be outdone, reached around behind him and pulled an older boy forward, "Me too!" he said. As Erik the other senior squire dismounted, they could see he also had a boy with him.

The boys looked shyly at the knights and squires. Gawaine led them over to the rocks so they could sit beside the others. They were surprised to see a baby. "He's mine…" said the possessive Lem.

The saddle bags were unpacked and food was laid out. The rabbits were gutted and skinned. On skewers, they were placed over the fire and the smell of cooking food filled the area.

The adults left the cooking to the squires, this was after all their training exercise. Caedrik, Tomas, Gawaine and Merlin sat together and tried to piece the puzzle together. Two of the boys in Tomas's group had escaped from the wagon during the night; the other had managed to wander away when they were having one of the rare pee breaks. One said that he had picked the largest tree and then hidden behind it when all the others were rounded up. None of them had been injured beyond punches and bruises and they all belonged to the same village and two of them were cousins. They had not seen any other children in their travels and the squires had found them together trying to light a fire as they'd caught a hare and were hungry. They said that food had been given to them on the wagon but the bigger boys had taken it and there was not enough to satisfy them. They were also all very thirsty.

Tomas mentioned sadly that they had also seen bodies of three other young children. The men knew that all the kids were rounded up and taken but the younger ones and the injured ones were of no value and often dumped.

Gawaine mentioned Oxslip and the two other knights agreed that it would be their destination. The squires were all in good health and apart from Jed who was still being carried by either Caedrik or Merlin, the others seemed able to manage.

Smells of roasted rabbit were wafting over to them and Gawaine as Senior Knight said, "That's it, let's eat, I'm hungry…make sure the boys get fair-sized portions of the fresh meat, we can always fill up on the dried venison we have. I also have three quarters of a wineskin of mead so it should help alleviate any hunger pains."

Caedrik grinned, "Enough for four?"

"Count me out…" said Merlin, "That way, there's enough to go around. Cider will suit me fine."

"Such a hero!" said Gawaine putting his arm across his shoulders and giving him a hug. "I was glad to see that you were all in one piece. Finding some of the boys, you wonder if any others were chucked out of the wagons or managed to escape. Let's hope they can reach civilisation and make their way back home or be taken in by other villagers."

Soon everything was quiet, Erik offered to take the first watch and apart from a few tears the boys had settled well. They had been exhausted yet surrounded by knights and squires they felt safe and with full stomachs sleep came quickly.

-0-0-

Little Tommy slept through the night but Rhylin woke early knowing that someone was watching him sleep. He opened one eye and a little face was looking at him, "Me hungry...!" the toddler said and Rhylin sat up and smiled.

Merlin was already up and handed Rhylin a bowl. In it were small pieces of rabbit with lots of gravy. Merlin had broken some dried bread into it and warmed the whole thing on the fire. "Not really porridge but Gaius has made me stuff like this when I have a cold and I must say it goes down easily. I made enough for the other boys as well but the squires will have to have the bread as it is. Maybe next time, we should pack extra food for emergencies like this."

"Well, we never expected to have an extra six small mouths to feed." He smiled down at Tommy who had put his fist in the mixture and was happily chewing on it. Rhylin smiled and took some in his fingers and fed it into the boy's mouth.

Merlin said, "By the looks of him, he'll be needing a bath before he can be handed over to his mother."

"Do you think we'll ever be able to return them to their village? Will there even be anyone to return this one to?"

"Well, the Jed boy is old enough to give us an idea where it is and unless the whole village was wiped out, I'm sure we can find some family to take them in. Arthur will give the families money for the added expense of keeping them in food."

Soon everyone had eaten; the squires cleaned up the campsite and Gawaine remembered the buckle he had found and sure enough, it was off Tomas's saddlebag. Lem let Jed ride with Merlin who was worried about the time it was taking for the boy to get up on his feet.

Everyone was mounted and the little cavalcade made their way through the woods, Gawaine and Caedrik in the lead with Merlin and Tomas bringing up the rear. The boys were chatting and all in all Merlin was pleased with the state of affairs. He just wondered what Arthur and the others had found.


	15. Chapter 15

**CHAPTER 15 : WAITING IS WORSE**

They heard from an innkeeper that the king and his knights were about a two day's ride ahead of them on the way to Oxslip. It was on a river and although it was now a small town to begin with it had been a small village close to a ford. The story goes that old Bertha was taking her ox across the river to plough. This ox could be quite obstinate and the villagers would amuse themselves watching the farmer's wife, alternately cajole and threaten the big animal. One day after heavy rains, the river bank was soft and the ox to everyone's surprise slid down the bank and crossed the ford with no trouble. The ford area became known as Oxslip and as the village grew it adopted the name of the local ford.

Merlin smiled at the innkeeper as he enjoyed learning about original names. The boys had all been fed and put to bed after any injuries had been seen to. The innkeeper's wife generously offered to look after the toddler allowing Merlin to have a meal with the others. She also hinted that maybe a good wash and a change of clothes were in order, telling Merlin not to worry as she had plenty of hand-me-downs from her own eight children.

Relinquishing baby Tommy to the kind hearted woman, Merlin joined the others in front of the fire. They had met up with Gavin and the guard who had two more children in tow bringing their total to eight escapees.

Gawaine was quite happy. He had an almost inexhaustible supply of beer, a warm fire, good food and the best of company and if he was lucky a cot or at least a dry floor to lie on. "This has turned out to be an excellent mission, we saved eight kids. Once we meet up with Arthur, we can hand them over and let someone else return them to their families and make haste to return to Camelot. My bed is calling to me!"

"As well as the barmaid at The Wild Briar," added Gavin with a laugh.

"That was supposed to be a secret!" said Gawaine with a grin.

"Some secret! You are less that discreet and when you are in your cups, like nothing better than boasting about your conquests!" Caedrik added.

Gawaine turned saying, "Merlin, come to my aid…"

Merlin grinned and said seriously, "Gawaine, you sometimes do get a bit carried away. However, you're not the only one who sometimes stops out over night returning to the castle and many times to Gaius's chambers the following morning, a little worse for wear."

"Shame on you, Merlin! Is that a confession?" suggested Gawaine.

Merlin blushed and glancing around said seriously, "I can assure you, Gentlemen, that I have no need of or time for such entertainment."

"And wouldn't Arthur love to hear that?" Gawaine said putting his arm across Merlin's shoulders.

Gavin smiled; as he said, "Not to worry, as he already knows."

-0-0-

The following morning they again got organised with their extra charges. Tommy was returned to Merlin, clean, well fed and happy. The innkeeper's wife had included some cloths for keeping him dry and a linen dress like tunic as well as one of homespun wool. Merlin offered her some money which she was reluctant to take but he kidded her by saying, "You look young enough to have many more children and will need to replace the clothes you have given us."

"Go away with you, young man! I'm well past that and don't go wishing it upon me again! You'll be giving my husband ideas."

Merlin grinned and went to Rhylin and handed Tommy up to him. The toddler squealed happily seeing his usual keeper and soon snuggled against the squire's chest fell asleep to the motion of the horse. Lem smiled seeing his little brother with the squire and Merlin mounted and Caedrik handed him Jed. He was improving, much brighter and less fevered but Merlin really wanted a healer to have a good look at the boy's problem leg.

Tomas had arranged for food to be carried with them in case they found nothing to feed the youngsters. He packed it away in various knights' saddle bags. All water skins were filled and the little procession left the village.

"Visitors like that could come more often," said the innkeeper with a satisfied grin. "They paid handsomely for what they received and there was no fighting or smashing up the place."

-0-0-

Arthur's group had steadily made its way to Oxslip. He was tired of visiting villages even though the others knights tried to share some of his duties but the people wanted to see the king and tell him their problems. He listened in dismay as he heard of the children and young men who had been captured and promised to see that as many as possible would be returned home. He also gave extra money to the village leaders to help get any found children back to wherever they belonged.

He has seen first hand some of the young stragglers who had managed to return to the villagers, and knew that for every child he saw, there must have been another four who were never to return. The look on their faces as they told their parents of having to leave friends who were unable to walk or who had been killed, was bone chilling.

Leon was his second in command and knew that for the villagers, their children were a necessity. Pickings were sparse on some lands and as many hands as possible were needed to get crops in and hopefully harvested. Animals needed to be grazed and without fences, many herds and flocks were walked to pasture areas and guarded throughout the day by the young kids, returning to the safety of the village overnight.

Spenser had taken over the responsibility of finding suitable accommodation for the group. Arthur was willing to stay with just so many village leaders so, he was always on the lookout for clean inns and pubs while they were on their travels.

Romney was the money keeper and had plenty of silver on his person and in his saddle bags to dole out to those in need. Hardworking villagers were rewarded and encouraged to keep going. Lazy villagers were given a pittance and the reminder that they had to work for what they got. The sick and the elderly were also taken care of. Any woman taking in an orphan or abandoned child was also given some silver to help with expenses.

Simon and Rook, scouted ahead for information regarding the slave traders and the boys. The two of them would return every two days as Simon seemed to have a knack for ferreting out information even when villagers were frightened to speak in case of reprisals.

Arthur missed Merlin. At times he felt torn in two especially at night, when the camp had quietened and he was alone. The other knights gave him his space and he missed the closeness of another human being. He smiled to himself, wondering how Merlin was managing as he always seemed to gravitate towards another body in his sleep. At least he had Gawaine with him, who wasn't too proud to allow Merlin to sleep close to him.

He suddenly realised that he was more than ready to return to Camelot. He'd stay in Oxslip for three nights and then they could return home, leaving a message for Gawaine's group to follow them there as soon as possible. He wondered how many children had been found and his mind flashed to that awful time when they had found the De Vire family massacred and he had Merlin against a tree, and a little boy had clasped his arms around Merlin's leg and wouldn't let it go. He smiled to himself, it had been Treva's lucky day when he had found them but in retrospect also their lucky day.

Arthur's lodging wasn't great but this time, it was private. Over the last ten days, he'd had varied accommodation. He'd stayed in village leaders' homes, some one step above a peasant's cottage to a chamber in a manor house, to staying in a variety of inns where he shared the community rooms with his knights and on many nights camping rough.

Romney was worried as they had had no contact with the squires and Sirs Caedrik and Tomas. He knew that his brother Rhylin was one of the senior squires in the group. Deep down he was worried that the group had run into the slavers and the boys had been taken.

Spenser had on numerous occasions tried to alleviate his fears, "Caedrik and Tomas are experienced knights and Rhylan is quite capable of looking after himself, as proof of that he was chosen to accompany the younger squires on the expedition. He certainly wouldn't have been included if the squire master didn't have confidence in him." Privately, he was glad that Simon was with him in Arthur's group.

"It's not that I don't trust him. It's just that I have seen what these men are capable of. They are the scum of the earth. They have no respect for family life and to them the only value of a human life is monetary."

Arthur said, "Hey, you two! Why so serious we have a good inn, plentiful food and great company?"

Romney smiled at Spenser and put his arm across his shoulders, giving him a friendly squeeze, "Nothing to worry about, Arthur, when do the celebrations begin?"

Arthur laughed but he knew what was worrying Romney. It had cast a pall over the whole group. Their inability to find out much about the slavers and the lack of reports from either the squires' or Gawaine and Merlin was disheartening.

Arthur knew that once he saw that Merlin was safe that his spirits would rise. He hated being separated from him. In the castle even if he wasn't underfoot, he knew that he was easily accessible if needed. However, here even though he was probably in the area, it was too far away to put him at ease.

Following supper, they withdrew to their sleeping quarters.

Arthur asked his old friend Spenser to join him. His chamber had two cots and it seemed a shame for someone to sleep on the floor when an extra cot was available. Neither of the men were sleepy, so they talked long into the night.

-0-0-

The boys now felt quite at ease with the junior squires and Lem thought Rhylin was special as he was still the guardian of little Tommy. They respected the knights and were a little wary of them but Merlin they all loved. Jed was becoming a little more daring and with his hand on one of the other boy's shoulders, managing to hop around after his hero.

Gawaine used to tease Merlin about his magnetic personality. "Guess that is why Arthur puts up with you," he said with a broad grin.

"Must be..." Merlin responded, "...as it certainly isn't because of yours!"

"I'll have you know that I have my own band of followers."

"So I've noticed every town drunk and stray dog!"

Gawaine bristled, "I was thinking more of buxom barmaids and comely wenches! Anyway, Merlin, if you're not nice to me, I'll tell Arthur!"

"And you think, he'll take your side? I have him, hook, line and sinker."

"Very nice, you just likened our Illustrious Leader to a fish!"

Merlin grinned and leaning closer to Gawaine said quietly with a knowing smile, "It's all in the eyes of the beholder...the ability to mesmerise and captivate. That mouth perfected for hours of pleasure, those lithe hands, the hair asking to be fondled, the muscled body asking to be touched, the sheened skin demanding to be kissed, those peat brown eyes windows to the very soul..."

Gawaine realised that he was the brunt of a joke, spun to grab Merlin but he managed to get away calling over his shoulder, "One day, I"ll tell you what animal I see you as, Gawaine!"

"...and me you!" laughed Gawaine, "Oink, oink!"

Rhylin grinned to himself he could understand why Gawaine was a good friend of Arthur but more so how the king felt for Merlin. He was looking forward to joining up with the king and his group of knights as Merlin had told him that Romney was with Arthur. It would be good seeing his brother again.

Everyone was mounted, Gawaine and Merlin leading. Merlin mentioning what the inn-keeper had forecast about two days to Oxslip, said, "If the weather holds, do you think we could put in a full days' ride?"

"Anxious, …are you to get there?"

Merlin nodded, "I just need to see him and know that he is all right."

Gawaine nodded, "We'll see how far we can go but the kids will be getting tired, as easy as it is for us to ride, it is still tiring for them. Let's see how it goes and whether we can find somewhere to stay. We can leave early tomorrow morning and if everything falls into place get to Oxslip late afternoon.

The trail they had been following was steepish and at times, the knights had led their horses with the kids sitting up high in the saddles. Any who were too nervous about riding alone, walked together in a little group. They stopped for lunch above a small waterfall. The valley below with its winding river seemed peaceful but they could pick out no cottages or farms.

Rhylin was happy to see that the inn-keeper had sent a little bowl with some gruel in it for Tommy. He ate it then munched quite happily on half a carrot. Merlin wished that the growing season had been more advanced as he could have supplemented their food with the fruits of the land.

He took James the other senior squire and they went down to the river. Merlin wanted to see if there were trout lazing the time away under the river bank. He saw one and motioned for James to watch and lay full out on his stomach. He slipped one hand in the water letting it drift with the current. He softly touched the trout until it settled accepting that whatever was touching it was no threat. He slid his fingers along its body closer to its gills and with a quick upward movement he swung it out of the river by its gills and deposited in on the ground behind him.

James whispered, "I've heard about tickling trout but I have never actually seen it in action. That was great!"

Merlin returned to the river bank careful not to cast a shadow and with six minutes had another two trout on the bank. "Now, it's your turn." James crawled forward and saw a nice sized trout languidly swinging his tail to keep in position in the current. Merlin took his hand and guided it into the water. "Relax your fingers…" he whispered, "They're supposed to be weeds in the current. Move slowly and see if you can cup your hand so that the trout is almost floating above it." Merlin withdrew his hand slowly smiling at the look of concentration on the squire's face. "When you feel comfortable grab it and swing it behind you onto the ground."

Merlin watched as a good sized fish came up out of the water and then twisted and flew in an arc into deeper water. The look of disappointment on James' face was obvious. "That was actually very close but don't worry as it was only your first try. It took me at least five times to even get as far as you did. I'd go to close my hand and they'd be off. But I'll tell you one thing that first trout which I brought back to my mother and we had grilled for supper was the best trout I have ever tasted."

James was itching to try again, he watched Merlin move slowly along the river edge and glance over, he smiled saying quietly, "Here's another one. Give it another go!"

James slithered forward. He concentrated, shaking his hand to relax and slowly dipped it into the river behind the fish. He put all his thoughts into what his hand was doing. He felt the fish and knew by a slight tickle from the fins that his hand was in the right position. He made a quick movement and his finger slipped into one of the gills. He swung his hand back over his shoulder and as there was no immediate splash knew that he had been successful.

He rolled over and saw Merlin picking up a flapping fish, saying, "You're a fast learner. I'm going on the other bank. You stay on this side and move slowly up stream."

Merlin jumped from rock to rock to cross the river, wading wherever needed. He smiled to himself, looking across at James, who was a serious young man, always very precise in what he said and very well-mannered. He had the makings of a fine knight and as Merlin looked he saw another trout lifted out of the river and a big grin on James' face.

Within a half hour, they returned to the others with nine gutted fish hanging on a vine, "Congratulate this young man!" said Merlin, "He has helped ensure that we have a good supper ahead of us."

Rhylin walked over and patted his friend on his back, "Which ones did you catch?"

James proudly pointed to three he had caught as Merlin said, "He's a natural. Just the person you want on expeditions when the food is running low." The other squires gathered around to see what James' had caught.

Gawaine smiled and nodded at Merlin saying, "Thanks! He's been a little out of the limelight since Rhylin has received nearly all the attention by taking the care of Tommy."

A little hand got hold of Merlin's and a child's voice said, "Sir, could you teach me how to do that?"

"Ethan, you're a little too young at the moment but I'm sure that if you ask James, who will be only to happy to explain how he did it."

Gawaine listened to the conversation and he thought that Arthur really knew how to choose his friends. This man was so well suited to dealing with people, adults or children. He was able to get even the most uptight person to relax and any group which had him in their midst was blessed.

He gave the order and they mounted. They continued following the trail and just before dusk, they stumbled upon an ideal camp site. A dell surrounded by boulders and trees. The dip in the land was still covered in last year's leaves providing perfect beds to lie upon. As long as the weather stayed dry, they would all manage.

They cleared an area of leaves and the boys moved some rocks and in no time a fire was going as the squires were great at searching for wood especially when they were hungry. The guard and Caedrik went off with the water skins to fill them as Gavin laid out what remained of the bread from lunch and it looked as if there would be enough to go around. The trout were roasted whole on a spit above the fire. The aroma soon permeated the area and the kids gathered around in anticipation.

Once all the food had been finished the fire was rebuilt and bedrolls were laid out around it. The children were in the inner circle with the knights, senior squires and guard forming an outer protective ring. To lose one of the children now would be heartbreaking.

The little ones went off in groups to answer the call of mother nature and returned with Sir Tomas keeping a count to see that everyone returned. He decided it was easier to travel with the older boys and other knights as he's never had to watch over their comings and goings. He smiled to himself. He knew they had only found a few children but he was going to arrive in Oxslip with all his squires accounted for and a handful of children as well. He waited for the stragglers to return and got them settled for the night. They were all very conscious of being alone and as a results tried to stay together, making his job a lot easier.

Some of the younger squires shared their bedrolls with the children. Merlin looked at them and he felt sad. He also had someone to cuddle with but sadly he was at least a day's ride away, that was if he had reached Oxslip safely. They had seen no other travellers so had no news of the others…maybe tomorrow would bring news.


	16. Chapter 16

**CHAPTER 16 : A LIGHT IN THE DARK **

Merlin took the third watch. As they were in an unknown region, the four knights and Merlin took turns, two hours approximately each, the one on sentry duty also being responsible for keeping the fire going. Once it had become dark they had turned in. There was not much wandering around during the night as none of the adults had ale available to them.

The third watch was quiet so, once Caedrik had woken him, he banked up the fire and then made himself comfortable against one of the boulders. From there, he could see the entire campsite. They weren't expecting trouble but with so many youngsters it was best to be prepared.

He was day-dreaming of Arthur's first and last attempt to catch a trout by hand. He had become more and more furious as Merlin had scooped one after another onto the bank and the closest he had got was to have one wriggle out of his hands and make a graceful arc into the deeper water. He had stomped off in disgust.

Merlin had called after him, "Quitters never win!"

That came back to haunt him as the prince had insisted upon Merlin's joining him in his training class for sword handling the following day. Merlin was hopeless and finally fell in a tangle of limbs during the basic exercises. To hear Arthur say as he hauled him to his feet, "Quitters never win!"

Humphrey, Arthur's then manservant had appeared on the scene and told Arthur that he was being a little over demanding as Merlin had never had any sword experience and was at a serious disadvantage. Arthur shrugged his shoulders and whispered to Merlin when they were out of Humphrey's hearing, "Quitters never win!"

Merlin looked at him and punched him in the arm, Arthur did the same and Merlin ran away with Arthur trailing after him leaving the ever-patient Humphrey to pick up the practice swords. Smiling and back in the present, Merlin hoped that Randall would also have a calming affect on Treva.

Sitting back against the boulder, he was conscious of a noise which he recognised as the sound of quiet sobbing. He walked over to the fire and found Jed who was sleeping alone, crying.

Merlin knelt beside the boy saying, "What's wrong? Is you leg hurting you?" Jed shook his head and blushed.

"Well then, what is it? I can't help you if you keep it a secret."

"I can't get up by myself and I need to pee!" the boy sobbed, "I don't want to wet myself like a baby."

Merlin felt bad, he should have checked on Jed when he started his watch. "I'll give you a hand. " He reached down and pulled the boy to his feet making sure no stress was put on the splinted leg.

Jed stood saying sheepishly, " I'm…I'm..."

Merlin waited but the boy never continued then he twigged, "Would you like me to walk with you as it is rather dark and we'd be better together?"

The look on the boy's face showed that Merlin had hit the nail on the head, Jed was afraid of the woods in the dark.

Once he had him settled back by the fire, Merlin made his way back to the boulder and relived something. It had reminded him of their sessions with Treva after they had found him. On the way home, understandably the youngster was petrified of the woods and would only venture into them if he was hanging onto Merlin's hand.

Gawaine was coming to and he got up and walked over to Merlin, "I'll take over, I can't sleep…it's almost dawn. You can get a couple of hours sleep if you're lucky. Was your watch quite?"

"Yes, just one escorted trip to 'find a tree' with young Jed. The woods hold all sorts of threats for him." He carried his bedroll over to the group, glancing at Jed who was breathing steadily obviously fast asleep.

By the time the others started moving around, Merlin was waking up. He watched the little group around him. They had become closely knit because of their shared experiences.

-0-0-

By noon, the rains came. The knights let the kids who were riding behind them slip under their cloaks to keep dry. Rhylin, James and some of the bigger squires offered their cloaks to the other little boys. By mid-afternoon everyone had had enough so when they happened upon some caves, everyone's spirits were raised as Gawaine said that they might as well call it a day.

The caves proved to be large and dry. Fires were built and everyone gathered around them to keep warm and in some cases try to dry off. Gawaine and Merlin stood in the mouth of the cave and watched the relentless rain.

Merlin said, "I hope Arthur waits…I'd hate to be chasing him all the way back to Camelot."

Gawaine put his arm on his shoulder and said, "Don't worry, he will for you! Anyway, it's possibly pouring there as well and he knows how much you hate the rain that he will have figured that we have holed up somewhere just to keep you dry."

Merlin smiled and punched Gawaine in the arm.

The caves were certainly deep, the height was also surprising. They brought all the horses in out of the rain, fixing up a tie line to keep them from wandering among the people. The saddles and bridles as well saddle pads and bags were sopping wet.

Merlin looked at Iago who had nickered at him as he approached. The chestnut's soaked coat had turned a mahogany red. "Don't worry! We'll soon be going home and you'll be back in Camelot," Merlin said, adding, "Please God!" under his breath. He patted the horse's neck and pulled his wet forelock down the centre of his nose so that the rain droplets were no longer running into his eyes.

-0-0-

Once the children warmed up they became more active, chasing around and pleading to be allowed to explore the cave. Rhylin said that he didn't mind taking them so James and he rounded up any who wanted to join them and made their way to the back of the cave, exploring any and all nooks and crannies. They set off with torches made from firewood.

One of the younger squires came back to tell Gawaine that they had found another large cave with a smaller one off that which James wouldn't let anyone enter. The squire said, "He told me to tell you that one of the knights should come to check it out."

Gavin joined Gawaine and with the guard, they followed the squire back to where James was standing holding up the torch, "I didn't think that any of them should go in until you had checked it out."

Gawaine could see that the cave had been used by people. There was a couple of rudimentary sleeping pallets, a rough table with bench, a rustic food safe and surprisingly a rather ornate chest. It seemed to be oak with bands of iron hammered around it. It had metal ornamentation and a big padlock. Each end had a heavy wooden carving that resembled a handle.

"Let's get it into the main cave and see if there is anything on it to give us an idea of where it comes from. Where are the others?"

"They're still exploring and Rhylin is telling them stories of hidden treasure and vikings."

"Surely, you mean bandits?" said Gavin.

"Rhylin felt that maybe that was too close to home after what they had been through."

"Smart move!" Gavin said mentally congratulating the two senior squires on their quick thinking.

The two knights, James and the guard, carried the chest back to place it near the cave mouth. They were lots of breaks taken but finally the cumbersome article reached the daylight. It was quite heavily carved, certainly nothing that a peasant or even a rich landowner would possess. The padlock was solid iron and only a blacksmith would have tools to remove it.

"Now what do we do?" said Caedrik. "We don't have any pack horses and by the look of it, it might even take a wagon to move it."

Gawaine decided to roll it over to see if they could tell if something was inside. Balancing it on its side, they upturned it and heard something dislodged.

"Do we get to keep the treasure if there is any? You know finders keepers…" Tomas wanted to know.

"Doubt it as if possible it should be returned to its rightful owner. Anyway, nobody does anything until Arthur and Leon have had a look at it."

While it was on its side, the chest was examined. It had been made to last for a long time. There were some initials carved onto the front and a date but it was hard to read. Gavin looked at the designs and suggested, "I think that it is possibly a marriage chest. The lady's belongings would be put into it for the move to her prospective husband's home."

"Let's hope that she was a rich lady and that it is brimming with jewels and the like…" Gawaine commented.

"With our luck it will be clothes and embroidered undergarments and bed sheets."

"Ooh!" said Caedrik, "Had much experience with embroidered undergarments have you, Gavin?"

"No, but my mother had things like that…" However, his explanation was drowned out by the hoots and catcalls of the other knights.

Rhylin and the younger group came back. They were all excited about the cave with the cots and table. A few decided that they intended to sleep there but Merlin explained that the fires would be in the big cave and they might get cold sleeping so far away from the fire.

"Or frightened!" said Jed, the voice of common sense crowding in beside him.

Merlin put his hand on the boy's head and said quietly to him, "That's rights especially the younger ones."

The mood was broken by one of the other squires who had been looking after Tommy saying to Rhylin, "He's wet, you can have him back now."

"Come here, little one, let's see if we can make you more comfortable," said Rhylin and Lem trailed after the two of them.

-0-0-

Merlin fell asleep once the cave was quiet.

_Then, shouting, arguing and cursing disturbs him. __"You daft old blighter, I said no survivors!"_

_"She's a kid! She'll cause no harm... "The speaker reels from a slap to the side of his head. The leader, an older man curses all of them but especially the speaker._

_"It was a mistake letting you join us but your father said you'd be useful. Some bloody useful, you turned out to be! Get rid of her!"_

_One of the other men steps forward reaching for his knife but the leader shakes his head, "You'd enjoy that wouldn't you...a young woman at your mercy?" He turns to a taller man, "See to it, Smithy, and no funny business."_

_Watching from against the wall, he sees the girl being dragged to her feet. At one point she must have been pretty, but with her clothes in tatters, her hair in disarray and a dirty rag tied around her mouth, she had little to recommend her. He's glad he hadn't been chosen to do the deed; killing in hand to hand combat as distasteful as it was, he could stomach but wanton killing was another thing._

_He knows he doesn't belong with this group but he has no memory prior to being with them. He's fed and knows to make himself scarce when the others start to drink. Things get quickly out of hand and he's seen more than he would ever have wanted._

_The group of men are second class robbers, scouring the area and taking what they want. They benefit from the misfortunes of others. If there is no misfortune, they create it to keep themselves in food and money._

_Anything they want to get rid of, they do on market day, feeding a string of stall keepers too frightened to refuse to sell their ill-gotten goods. He glances at the travelling chest which the other men had unloaded from a wagon. He hopes it contains no booze but it is strange what some travellers carry with them._

_The man called Smithy returns wiping his knife on his thigh and rearranging his clothes. The boy listens in disgust at the lewd comments and hopes that it had been quick. He knows he doesn't belong as more and more ideas of honour, justice and fairness continue to flood his mind._

_The men are startled by a yell. The leader spins around as a mist of red seems to flood the cave. The noise is deafening, screams and punches. He is thrown against the wall cracking his skull. Darkness slowly descends wiping out the welcoming red..._

_He knows nothing until a hand touches his forehead. He comes back slowly. The light hurts his eyes and he's at a loss to remember what had been happening prior to the almighty crack he'd given to his head._

_A face comes into view, it is familiar as in a once remembered dream. It is frightening as the face is smiling, he fears the worse, most recently smiling for him has been usually associated with unpleasant things._

_He feels himself being lifted up and carried however he is too weak to fight it. He thinks he recognises the words "I have him!'_

_He feels himself slipping away lulled by a voice that is achingly familiar and has been missing from his world for so long._

_He wakes slowly to warmth and only a little pain. He remembers a phrase, out of sight out of mind and decides to play dead. His eyes are closed but his ears pick up various sounds. He hears the voices of men but the bullying and spite are missing. His upper body is being lifted. The voices are indistinguishable yet not frightening. Someone is encouraging him to drink and something warm and moist is put to his lips, as the warm liquid floods his mouth, he swallows. He is rewarded by the words, "Good, try another sip..." His eyes crack open as he recognises the voice. Everything looks fuzzy but for some unknown reason, he is not scared._

_A voice near his head calls out, "He's awake!"_

_There is a moment before another face comes into view and a voice full of compassion and love says, "Merlin..."_

_His past comes racing back to him. His heart starts racing as memories fall into place, he smiles but his mind can't adjust that quickly and he slips back into unconsciousness._

-0-0-

Merlin stretched, he put out his arm to touch Arthur but was greeted by emptiness. Remnants of the dream raced around his mind but he couldn't link the parts together. He smiled softly; they were soon to meet up with Arthur.

The rain stopped just before dawn. The sleepers were awoken by bird songs and sunlight. The adults skipped breakfast so that any remaining food went to the children.

Gawaine promised the fasters a fine meal at the nearest inn. The horses had been watered and Merlin advised feeding them half their ration of oats. He hoped that by tomorrow they would be able to find a farmer with hay and feed.

The chest was left where it had been dragged, Merlin assured them that it would be safe. He asked Tomas to sketch what was on the front of it, then they piled extra branches around it. It could always be collected later if necessary.

Once everyone was mounted, they left trying to avoid streams which looked in flood. The ground was wet but passable. The children were in high spirits and chatted happily. Merlin wondered at the ability of the young once they were cared for and well fed, to put things in the past even for some of them horrendous things. He was glad they had started on the road to recovery as no one knew what they would face when they returned home.

Mid-morning, they came to a small village of maybe six cottages. When the villagers saw the knights and children they were excited. The village leader came forward. He welcomed them; he was quite chatty and wanted to know if they had seen the king because he had and one of the guards with him had told him that they were on their way to Oxslip.

Gawaine told him that they were to meet the king in Oxslip, "How long will it takes to get there?"

"Day and a half at least..." said the chap. Merlin looked worried. "...however," the man continued, "If you go cross country you can cut two hours off the trip."

Merlin looked expectantly at Gawaine but he shook his head. He couldn't see going cross country with children, it would be too dangerous. Rhylin was coping well with Tommy and Jed was improving but these children were doubly precious and he intended to return them to parents in the best possible condition.

They took a break and were given bread and dried pork by the villagers who also brought out some homemade ale much to Gawaine's delight. Gavin paid them generously for the food and they also left with some dried fish. No grain was available as it was too early in the season for them to have extra supplies. The village leader assured them that when they got to Oxslip, there would be supplies. The women in the village made a big fuss over the younger kids and they were all smiles as they waved the kind women goodbye.

Little Ethan began to cry as they left. Merlin rode over to Caedrik and they switched boys. "What's wrong? Do you feel sick?"

The boy shook his head, "I don't think I have a Mammy anymore. The bandits attacked her and she never got up even when I yelled for her as I was dragged away." The lad dropped his head back on Merlin's chest and sobbed.

Merlin knew that it was a possibility that the children would be returning to broken homes and missing siblings or even parents. He couldn't lie to the boy so he soothed him wrapping him in his arms and told him that there would always be someone to take care of him. "Your Da will be waiting for you to return. Did you have any cousins in the village? The boy nodded. "Well then, I'm sure you could live with them. You're a strong boy you could help with the work."

The boy shook his head saying, "My cousins were on the other wagon and we never saw them again."

Trying to make the best of a bad situation, Merlin suggested that the family would certainly be needing help and that his aunt and uncle would be happy to see him. Ethan nodded and then said, "We have a lot of chickens and some pigs." Suddenly, he added, "I think they will probably have run away. What will happen to our cottage? Do you think they burned it?"

Merlin kept making positive suggestions but he knew that some of the children returned were at the mercy of the villagers and some would be treated badly, one step above being a slave. Village life was harsh, he knew from experience and not every mother on her own was able to take care of her family without a man to work their bit of land and harvest the meagre crops. Not many families could afford to take in an extra body especially if it were a child unable to do his fair share of the work.

The wind had picked up and the knights' and squires' cloaks were flapping. Gawaine turned and rode back to speak to him. "If we were one and a half days away at midmorning, we must be one half day closer. Let's continue riding until dusk and than camp at the next suitable place.

Coming to the top of a hill, they could look down over a valley and on the horizon were able to pick out a village, too far to reach tonight but something to aim for. The trail they were on, intersected a larger one.

Tomas pulled out his map and suggested that they take it as it was going north west. Within three miles, Gavin said that he recognised the hill with the lone pine and that they were certainly on the way to Oxslip. As the track was intersected by others, it became more of a road and the riders were able to canter beside each other. There were wagon tracks and even what looked like footprints. During the day, the road was probably well travelled.

They came upon an abandoned cottage and barn and decided to stop. It was already dusk and visibility was poor. The horses were tied beside the derelict barn and everyone else went inside. The guard started a fire with dead grass and twigs, slowly added scraps of dried bark, while the squires collected wood. James went off to get water and Merlin set about making something for them to eat. He felt guilty but he took the oats which he should have been feeding to Iago and crushed them between two stones before adding them to the water that was boiling over a fire. Caedrik came over and did the same saying, "Max can wait until tomorrow for grain."

The resulting gruel was coarse but it was warm and plentiful. No one turned his nose up at it or the dried fish. Merlin had gone into the little woods nearby and brought back some spring greens. The kids obediently ate them with the fish but Gawaine just rolled his eyes to heaven saying, "Are you trying to kill me?"

Merlin grinned, "I can assure you you've eaten worse than this in your lifetime."

Half of the barn's roof was missing but it was out of the wind and gave some cover. Placing the kids close to the fire, the adults slept around them. Lying there, looking up at the clouds scudding across the sky, Merlin wondered if Arthur was also watching the sky. He smiled and whispered, "Soon, Arthur, soon!" and turned towards the fire to fall asleep.


	17. Chapter 17

**CHAPTER 17 : MAN'S FINAL FORTUNE **

Merlin slept deeply his mind occupied with memories.

He was with someone whom he trusted implicitly almost a physical entity joined to him. He could imagine his touch, hear his voice and strongly feel his presence regardless that he never actually saw him. The fact that he was there had been sufficient.

When he awoke it took him a few moments to separate dream from reality. He accepted that overnight Arthur had been with him if not physically then mentally and that feeling until he was able to put his arms around him, had to suffice. He smiled today had finally arrived; they would be at their destination, Oxslip and Arthur. He corrected himself, surely it was Arthur and Oxslip… He laughed to himself he knew that the location would be of little importance when he would finally see the most important person in his life.

Merlin was up early. He nodded at Tomas who was still on sentry duty. "If I've been lucky, I'll have a couple of rabbits for us," he whispered making his way into the woods. He backtracked about a half mile. Reaching his first trap, he found it had been demolished. He checked around finding tufts of rabbit fur and paw prints, fox for certain. He was annoyed, that meat was his for the children not for some wily vixen's cubs. Then he smiled, there was plenty to go round just not this morning. His other traps produced three more rabbits. He gutted them, rinsing them in the stream. On the way back to the old farmstead, he broke branches suitable as skewers.

By the time the children were waking, the aroma of roasting meat filled the barn. Excited little faces watched Merlin as he lifted the cooked meat away from the fire and set it up against the old well to cool off.

James soon had all the youngsters seated and Gavin divided up the meat making sure that some of the younger squires also shared the treat.

Gawaine watched them, he'd be glad to get them all to Arthur as he realised that as much as kids could be fun, they were also time-consuming and a bigger responsibility than he was willing to face right now. He smiled as he watched Merlin wiping off sticky faces and hands while saying, "You don't want to get the knights' tunics all sticky when you ride behind them do you?"

A chorus of laughing voices said, "No, Merlin!"

Today was going to be a long one. They had to complete a full day's ride of some eight hours to arrive late afternoon…that was if all went well. The road was good and some of the knights put their charges on the saddles in front of them so that on good stretches they could canter. They had no intention of losing the smaller kids if they were unable to hang on behind. Slowly, they were getting closer to their king.

Rhylin realised that he was going to miss his little Tommy. He consoled himself with the knowledge that as an uncle he had little Rupert. It would be good to get home but he had grown fond of the little boy and was like many of the other knights worried about the reception the boys would receive when they arrived back in their own villages. Once as a first year squire, he had observed a village decimated by bandits and the obscene sights had remained in his mind causing him to lose not only sleep but also weight. Finally, his father Sir Calder had stepped in and told his son to let bygones be bygones and to live in the present. If he intended to follow in the footsteps of his brother Romney who had been at that time a senior squire, he had to acknowledge and accept the good in people and not dwell on the bad things which happened in life.

Sirs Caedrik and Tomas had the responsibility of getting all the squires back safe and sound. They certainly had not banked on picking up eight other kids. This was one expedition with squires that they wouldn't forget for a long time. They were proud of how the boys had behaved especially their senior squires who had both proven their worth.

Merlin only had one thought and if he were to be truthful, it had nothing to do with squires or children. He hated being separated for long stretches from Arthur. He could endure it if there were missives every couple of days but not knowing the situation made it hard.

At midday, the group stopped at an inn. There was plenty of food available and ale for the adults. The children ate mutton pies with swedes while a few of the adults decided on a liquid diet regardless of being advised by Merlin to eat something as otherwise the afternoon ride would descend into a stop and start ride with continual 'calls of nature'.

"I'll be able hang on until we get to Oxslip," Gawaine boasted.

Merlin just raised his eyes and said, "No kidding? I'll make a gentleman's wager that within three hours you'll be pulling up to 'pick a tree'."

Never one to agree with the voice of reason, Gawaine insisted, "You're on and I'll treat everyone of you to a drink in Oxslip if I can't hold out until we meet up with Arthur."

The two of them shook on it with Merlin joking, "I can just see it. Arthur gathered with the others at the inn and you dashing in, pushing past him to find a chamber pot while announcing to all present that you'd won and had to pee!" The others laughed as a free drink on Gawaine was not to be taken lightly. He had a tendency to be over generous with anyone willing to drink with him.

"Rather you than me, I wouldn't bet on anything. Had too much experience with long rides and once one person needs to go it's contagious!" laughed Caedrik.

As it turned out, Gawaine was to run up quite a bill at the inn in Oxslip as after a gruelling time riding beside a fast flowing river and the knights continually asking him how he was holding out. He caved in, dismounting with a flourish and headed behind a boulder announcing, "Gentlemen, I believe I have a date with Mother Nature."

Merlin decided it made sense to give all the kids a break from riding. He dismounted and leaving Iago with Gavin, he walked on ahead with Rhylin and the children.

It felt good to be on a road with other travellers. The feeling of being cut off from the world was behind them and their brother knights were waiting for them. They had heard from two farmers returning home with an empty wagon that King Arthur and his knights were still in Oxslip.

Jed slipped his hand into Merlin's. Glancing down, Merlin looked into his serious face, "You're not feeling well?"

"Scared..." said the boy shaking his head, "I don't know what I'm going to find when I arrive home."

Merlin could understand as for the last six days, the boy had had company of his own age and had been protected by knights. He'd been in a group which was tightly knit and as the days went by his experience at the hands of the slavers had faded slightly to become unwelcome memories. Life was going to be very different for them when they were separated from the knights and squires.

They were walking along when they heard the hoof beats of fast moving horses behind them, Rhylin got the kids onto the side of the road and two messengers dressed in Camelot red raced past them. They waved at Merlin but didn't stop. The next horses they were to hear were Gawaine's and the rest of their own party catching them up.

Gawaine told Merlin that he had managed to yell to the messengers who had slowed down when they came upon the knights, asking them to tell the king that they would see him before supper. One of the messengers yelled, "Will do!" and had urged his horse into a canter which turned into a gallop before he was out of sight.

Once everyone was again mounted, they rode on through many little villages. Coming through a section of woods, they could see in the distance a small town nestled on the banks of a broad river...

As they turned the corner, they reached a primitive bridge across the river and dismounted. Carrying precious cargo, the knights decided to walk across the bridge either carrying their charges or having them walk beside them. The horses seeming to realise that a rest and probably food was up ahead, followed with their ears pricked.

-0-0-

At the end of the bridge with grins on their faces were Spenser and Romney. "Welcome! We heard from the messengers that you'd arrive today. What's with all the extra faces?"

Gawaine grinned as he reached them, "Some found us and others we found. It's been quite a trip. Did you get the slavers?"

"No such luck but we do have five or six youngsters. Come on, Arthur's at the inn waiting to see you."

Gawaine raised his eyebrows quizzically so Spenser added, "Well, maybe not you exactly but one of your company."

Romney had walked onto the bridge until he fell in step with Rhylin carrying the toddler, "Whatever have you got there?"

"His name is Tommy and I have been his personal servant since he was found, he's Lem's brother, the kid with Sir Gavin. It was pretty disastrous to begin with but then Merlin gave me some tips and we've been getting on fine ever since. He's become the mascot of the expedition."

His big brother said, "I'm glad to see you, as no one had any idea where your group was and even questioning the people coming into town brought no news. For the last couple of day's Arthur's been uptight. We were supposed to have left yesterday but the rain was torrential and he decided to postpone it for another couple of days. Thank God!"

Spenser upon reaching Merlin said, "You go ahead, I'll take Iago? Looks as if you were in the wars," he said to the boy who had been walking beside Merlin.

"Yes, Sir Knight, Merlin thinks I have pulled something in my leg but I can hobble with this splint."

"This is Jed and he is one of the oldest. He'll be able to give us information regarding the whereabouts of his village," Merlin added.

"Merlin, make yourself scarce," said a grinning Spenser, "Arthur's at The Cock and Bull. It's to the right at the end of the bridge road. I'll take care of Jed."

"Thanks and make sure that Iago get his ration of grain. We had them on half rations as food was scarce."

-0-0-

Merlin hurried to the inn; knights he passed, congratulating him on his arrival with guards smiling and nodding at him. He walked into the ale room to see Leon and Simon at the table. Leon stood and walked over giving him a hug, "Thank goodness you're safe. The messengers didn't specify names."

Merlin smiled, "We all made it safely and added a few extra mouths as well...where's Arthur?"

Simon grinned, "Not here!" Seeing the look of disappointment on Merlin's face he added, "Had a meeting to attend with the Captain of the Guard. He'll be back soon unless you want to go out to find them, they're camped behind the smithy."

"No, I'll wait until he comes back."

Leon ever the diplomat said, "Why don't you wait in his chambers, it's sort of private? I'll move my stuff into Romney's. He's missed you and it will give you some private time but remember supper is served early here as the landlord likes everything cleared so he can fill the place with his regulars. Mind you, I think that tonight, the place might be filled with knights."

Merlin grinned at the two knights and followed Leon through a door and up a flight of stairs. Leon walked past three doors motioning one which was Romney's. "Some of the others are staying with the townspeople but Arthur decided to stay here so we took their three rooms."

He opened the next door, ushering Merlin in. There were two cots, a table and a bench and a small window which overlooked the courtyard. Leon picked up his bedroll off the cot he'd used and smiled at Merlin, "Remember the meal is early." He left saying, "Arthur's going to be so relieved, he knew you had Gawaine with you, but when we heard nothing, he began to worry."

Merlin slipped off his jacket and sat on the cot which Leon had used. He smiled to himself, swinging his legs up on the cot and slipping off his boots. It felt so good to straighten his back even if it were on a rope base covered with a questionably clean straw mattress. He decided to wait for Arthur.

Arthur saw that the knights had arrived, he quickened his steps as he and Rook turned towards the inn. He saw Gawaine and said, "Nice work, did you bring them all back safely?"

Gawaine nodded saying, "As you would have! Mind you, one of my party was really itching to get here, hightailed it off once he reached the bridge. Have a feeling he has a love interest somewhere."

"Yes, probably a young lady who's been waiting for him with bated breath," Arthur replied laughing as he threw his arm over Gawaine's shoulders taking him towards the inn. "Now, sorry I can't stay around I have someone to see..."

As Arthur left him Leon walked out, "Well, the expected ones have returned. Hear you've been having the time of your life with squires and kids. Hadn't taken you as a family man, Gawaine?"

Simon plunked three mugs of ale on the table. Gawaine and Leon reached for one each as Arthur reached the top of the stairs...

-0-0-

Arthur reached the door to his chamber and paused. His heart was beating faster than normal and it wasn't the climb up the stairs. He put his hand on the latch and it lifted quietly. He decided then and there to try to surprise Merlin but knew he would fail as Merlin seemed to be able to hear a butterfly land on a daisy so the chances of a surprise were remote.

He pushed the door ajar and saw a figure lying on one of the cots. He waited and could distinctly hear snoring. Merlin was fast asleep. Love swept through him, taking a few minutes to enjoy the feeling, he advanced slowly into the room carefully closing the door behind him.

The sleeping figure looked without a care in the world. Arthur smiled as grasped in the sleeper's arms was the doublet which he had left in the room only hours before. Merlin was lying on the bed cuddled up to a garment of his. Arthur's heart flooded with love and he whispered, "Oh, Merlin…!"

He knelt on the floor beside him and took in every part of him. His hair was mussed and there was almost a smile on his lips, his breathing was steady and the faint flutter of his eyelashes told that his sleep was shallow.

Arthur had to control himself as Merlin's lips and ears were very tempting. He sat watching the person who knew him better than he even knew himself. The hand clutched the doublet again and Arthur marvelled at the long delicate fingers, capable of almost sending him over the edge. Merlin's tunic had ridden up and he could see a portion of his back. The muscles carefully defined but not so much to consider them bulky. He was a perfection of lithe beauty. He wanted to run his knuckle down Merlin's cheekbone and had the inexplicable feeling that he was going cry. The king of Camelot wiped away a tear and thought, 'How could someone so perfect love me?'

Merlin was dreaming, there was no danger in the dream, just a warm feeling of knowing that he meant something special to someone and knew that the feeling was mutual and generously returned.

When Arthur entered the ale room alone, Leon said, "So, where is he?"

"Asleep…" answered Arthur.

"Before or after?" Gawaine said brazenly as the others chuckled.

Arthur half-heartedly scowled at him, "…he looked exhausted so I just left him to it."

"It took you this long to figure out that he was asleep?" said Spenser.

"I just stood and watched him hoping that he was going to waken."

"Knowing Merlin, he'll be disappointed that you didn't wake him!" said Gawaine with a broad wink.

"Maybe but now that I've seen that he is all right I can wait. Thank you for looking after him."

Gawaine nodded smiling, "Arthur, I can assure you that Merlin is more than capable of looking after himself. He could live as a hermit and never be cold or go hungry. As you may know, he has many hidden talents."

Arthur had the decency to blush and as the others smiled, the person in question stumbled into the room. "Did I miss supper, I'm famished?"

"So is Arthur…!" Leon said with a grin and the others laughed.

"Leon, you knew I was upstairs why didn't you tell Arthur I was there?"

"I went up but you were fast asleep and it seemed a shame to waken you," said Arthur with a soft smile.

Merlin grinned and squeezed past Simon so that he could sit next to Arthur, slipping into the small space so that they touched from the hip down. He said quietly to him, "It would have been a pleasant awakening I'm sure." He felt Arthur's hand on his knee and knew that the underlying message had reached its intended recipient.

Gawaine said, "Are we going to eat or do the two of you wish to meander off somewhere?"

Arthur slipped one hand around Merlin's shoulders and his other hand managed under the table to find his thigh and he stroked it, squeezing gently. Merlin turned to look at him and whispered, "I missed you so much!"

Holding up a mug of ale, Arthur said, "I'm glad that everyone arrived back safely, and I think you probably have a lot to report but first let's make the innkeeper's wife and girls happy by showing our appreciation for the wonderful food they have provided."

Caedrick, Tomas, Gavin and Gawaine brought everyone up to date on what had happened. Gawaine did not forget his wager and generously offered to pay for all the Camelot contingent's drinks for the rest of the evening. The landlord smiled, an inn full of knights celebrating was well worth having to turn away some of the locals who often made a pint last all evening. Anyway, it was a warm evening and there were enough benches outside for his regulars to occupy as they drank.

The room grew warm as the evening progressed and Merlin told Arthur that he had to go outside as he wanted to check on Iago. "The horses were really great and some of them were on half rations as we had little food and used their oats to make gruel for the kids. I just want to check on them."

As the knights began to check on available cots and even floor space, Merlin left the table and Arthur followed him. They slipped out the door and crossed the yard making for a building where the knights' horses were stabled. A sentry stood as they approached and Arthur told him to take a break as he was going to check on the horses himself tonight. Merlin smiled; checking he might be doing but it certainly wouldn't be only equine related.

Iago and the others had settled with the rest of the horses. Iago and Mulgan nickered as their owners came to them but settled quickly. Arthur perched on the edge of the wooden trough and Merlin slipped between his legs standing close to him. "There were many long nights while I was in the woods. I'd fall asleep and then be awake in what seemed like minutes."

Arthur leant forward and kissed the tip of his nose, "I missed you so much." He let his lips find Merlin's and Merlin stepped forward so that they were chest to chest. There was silence. Wrapping his arms around his waist, Arthur said, "If there was one way in which I could choose to spend eternity, it would be like this, with you in my arms surrounded by horses!"

Merlin grinned, "I don't even rate being that important that you would want me all alone?"

"Could be worse…" Arthur whispered seductively, "I could have left you out completely."

Running his hand up Arthur's chest, Merlin ran his finger over his lips and said, "…and what would it take from me to put that foolish thought out of your mind?" He ran his hand back to Arthur's hips and hooked his fingers into the waistband of Arthur's trousers and kissed him.

Arthur pushed his hips forward and Merlin smiled as Arthur deepened the kiss. They broke for breath and Merlin said, "I think we'd be better off in your chamber. The guard will be back soon and although this setting is very romantic what with the horses and everything, I prefer not to have a human voyeur."

Giving him another hug, Arthur slipped off his perch and the two of them walked out the door meeting the returning guard. "Everything to your satisfaction, Sire?" he asked.

"Perfectly!" said the king smiling into the darkness as his fingers found Merlin's and they made their way back to the inn.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18 : TYING UP LOOSE ENDS**

When they got back to the ale room, some of the others were still sitting around drinking so as not to seem inhospitable they joined them. Gawaine was still paying the tab so he offered both Arthur and Merlin another drink. Arthur finally stood up saying, "I'm ready to turn in. Merlin, stay and visit but remember everyone that tomorrow will come quickly and we have to do something about all those boys. Good night, Men!"

Merlin chose to remain at the table talking to Spenser. He knew that Arthur was going to wait up for him. The knights knew the next day but one they would again be splitting up as Arthur had to return to Camelot and the boys needed to be taken back to their villages. Spenser knew that Arthur would want Merlin to return with him so it was nice to be able to have a few extra minutes alone.

Gawaine mentioned the wooden chest and Leon said that they could ask some of the locals to collect it. They sat around trying to guess what might be in it. Gavin was still sure that it was a marriage chest and might contain the jewels of the lady involved.

"You know if she was already married, her chest would be in her chambers not travelling the countryside with her," said Rook. "She'd just have a small travelling chest."

"Unless she was a lady of high standing and then she might have had a wagon containing her clothes and whatever else women travel with."

"Their husbands…man servants and maid servants, sometimes even grooms and equerries," Simon said.

"But maybe she was relocating to a new residence. Anyway, I think it's worth checking on it as we might be able to return it to the rightful owner," Gavin suggested. "However, if it remains unclaimed, we can divide the contents and..."

"Gavin, you would look lovely in fine lawn embroidered nightdresses. Maybe some handsome young knight will come and sweep you off your feet!"

"I'm quite capable of finding my own love interest thank you!"

Merlin grinned, "By any chance, does the lovely Lady Barbara of Melton fall into that category?"

Gavin blushed and said, "Merlin, shut up! Last time I tell you anything in confidence."

During the following laughter, Merlin took the opportunity to stand up and say that he was ready to turn in. He left the room as Simon said, "I'm going up as well. Anyone else? Leon, there's an empty corner in our chamber, now that you've been chased out of Arthur's."

"As senior knight, I will commandeer a cot and maybe it will be you, Simon, who will be sleeping on the floor in the corner." The others laughed and as the group broke up, Leon said, "Easy day tomorrow, Arthur's called a meeting for noon. Breakfast optional! And Gawaine, I know the idea of an inn and eager serving girls appeals to you but could you please remember that Arthur will particularly want to hear a report from you."

Quietness returned to the ale room.

-0-0-

Merlin had reached the door to Arthur's chambers. He opened it quietly and turned slipping the wooden wedge into the latch to lock it. He turned and Arthur smiled at him saying, "Sorry the bed is rather small but we could share it if you'd like to!"

"Your wish is my command, Sire! Budge over...!"

An hour later, Merlin still lay cuddled against Arthur. He was loathe to leave the warmth of his body to cross the room to the other cot. He'd been so happy to find him well and in good spirits. Nevertheless, he knew that they would both feel better when they were in their own quarters in Camelot.

"How much did you miss me?" a sleepy voice asked.

Merlin smiled, how could he find words to express the depth of his love? "I love you as a falcon loves the sky or a stag loves the uplands, I love you with the intensity of a mother meeting her first born. I love you as faithfully as the waves love the seashore returning day after day to kiss the sand." He could feel Arthur sighing contentedly, "I love you as a moth does a flame until the day I die."

"You were doing so well with the falcon, the mother and the sea, why the moth?" Arthur huffed, "It spoilt the whole effect. I don't want the thought of your being consumed to a crisp in my mind."

"I know but it was meant to show you that my love has no holds barred. Until the very end, you will be the light of my life. I will gravitate to you in the daytime and the night… How about you? Tell me if you love me."

Arthur grinned and shifted himself; without a word he showed Merlin as he slowly and affectionately demonstrated his love for him.

Merlin as Arthur came back into focus, smiled lazily into his eyes and said, "Now, let me show you."

"No," said Arthur. 'I have your words in my heart and they will suffice for the time being. Good Night, my little falcon, sleep tight!"

Arthur lay there wishing that he could also paint with words pictures of his love for Merlin but he couldn't. He was more of a man of action. He knew that Merlin understood and anyway actions were after all better than words. Weren't they? He fell asleep almost immediately dreaming of moths and candle flames but this time, he was the moth and Merlin was the flame.

-0-0-

A persistent cawing woke Merlin the following morning. He vaguely remembered hearing the roosters at dawn but this noise was uncomfortably close. He had spent half of the night in his own cot and was able to pull himself up to look out the window. A family of crows was sitting on the lean to roof squabbling over what was probably the end of a dried out loaf stolen from the innkeeper's pigs. He glanced over at Arthur and said, "Crows!"

Arthur said, "Might as well get up and get ready for the meeting. There should be hot water outside the door, Leon arranged for the scullery maid to deliver water every morning." A half bucket of hot water could not compare to a tub full but he knew that he'd feel better once he'd given himself a lick and a promise. He smiled to himself.

Merlin brought in the water and looked quizzically at Arthur who was chuckling to himself. "What's so funny?"

"Memories of my first nursemaid Tilly grabbing me by the hand saying, 'No time for a full wash, come here, I'll give you a lick and a promise.' I seemed to spend my life having my hands and face washed."

"Me too! Mind you sometimes with my Mam it was just the corner of the rag which she had spit on and used that to remove any visible grime. Can't remember baths during the winter but I do remember standing in the clothes tub after the laundry had been done as she washed me down in the soapy water."

Merlin poured some of the water into the basin and motioned for Arthur to go first. "Use what you need; I can always go down for more."

"No need! There's enough here for the two of us."

"You should remind Leon to slip the girl a few coppers if she's been reliable as I'm sure she has many other chores. Is she one of the innkeeper's daughters?"

"Don't know who she is but she can't be more than nine but I'm sure she's working way before breakfast and washing goblets and clearing tables until the ale room closes."

The Arthur Merlin had first met, had lived in a world of privilege and although he was seldom rude to servants, he had no real understanding of the hours they put in. A comely serving girl might advance to being a maidservant but a humble scullery maid's greatest hope was to be made a kitchen maid. The life of the little scullery maids was hard, many dying young due to injuries from kitchen fires and boiling water. The young girl in question if a family member, was at least protected.

Arthur knew that he was known to all the castle staff because he was the king but he also realised that Merlin was known by all the castle staff because of the way he acted towards them. No one was insignificant and Merlin seemed to know who had married whom and who was expecting an addition to their families. He also sometimes entertained Arthur by telling him of the fun and games that went on below stairs with the royal servants lording it over the lower ones…not unlike Arthur's lording it over everyone else.

The first time he had said that, Arthur had become annoyed but Merlin had explained that it was Arthur's right to lord it over everyone, himself excluded that was! Merlin had received a punch in the arm for that and he'd taken off with Arthur running after him and they'd run headlong into Gaius and Geoffrey who had been walking together to the library. Arthur had apologising while Gaius said, "Arthur, even though Geoffrey and I understand exuberant and care free behaviour, I have a feeling that your Father might not approve or be that lenient."

As they got back to the royal chambers Merlin had said, "I take back what I said about your lording it over everyone, I think maybe Gaius has the upper hand!"

-0-0-

Arthur got dressed and soon he was sitting on the bed waiting for Merlin who seemed to have slowed to a stop. He was letting the water run through his fingers gazing into space. Arthur was surprised that he could remain so still as usually he was perpetually in motion.

"Merlin, I'm waiting! Come on, get a move on!" It had no effect, finally in desperation, he stood up and walked over to him and whispered in his ear, "Earth to Merlin! Earth to Merlin!"

Merlin blinked and came back to the present. He turned and gave Arthur a smile which made him want to get undressed again. "Sorry, I was miles away."

"Well, come on the table will be bare as I'm sure that Gawaine worked up a real appetite over night!"

"...and we didn't?"

Arthur grinned knowing what had been missing over the last couple of weeks...it was Merlin...

-0-0-

Late morning, the men gathered under an oak tree in the centre of the common. Arthur started to talk, bringing everyone up to date on what had happened since they had separated into two groups.

Gawaine then gave a report of his team's work. All eyes were on him and Arthur smiled he had made the right choice sending him with Merlin and Gavin. They'd complemented each other and the result had been a success.

Caedrik also reported on the squires' expedition. He mentioned that all the boys had helped with the younger children especially remarking on Rhylin's care of the toddler. He also said that he was proud of the squires for being willing to share their food.

Leon then outlined the future plans which Arthur had drawn up. Merlin knew regardless that he would be in the group which returned to Camelot with Arthur. He couldn't envision it any other way.

So, he slipped away; he wanted to check on the boys. Gavin had told him that the boys had been taken in by some of the townsfolk and that the town leader was going to look into getting the boys back to their villages. He found them sitting outside one of the homes which had agreed to feed them.

Jed came over to him. Merlin affectionately put his arm across the boy's shoulders. He was certainly moving more normally even with his primitive leg supports. Merlin said, "Is everything all right with all of you? Did you have enough to eat?"

"Yes, the families were very kind. Do you think that we will find anyone alive back home?" Already, Jed in his mind had left Oxslip and was returning to his own village.

"Did Mister Muzzly speak to you?"

"Yes, and I told him the names of the other villages near us and..." the boy said with a smile, "He knew one of them, something to do with his wife's family. He said that once he gets everyone organised, we'll be going home." The boy looked up at Merlin, "It's time isn't it, Merlin?"

"Yes, it's time!"

They were surrounded by the other boys and Merlin happily noticed that there were many smiles. Travelling with the knights might have given them a sense of protection but being back with families had them more relaxed. They soon scattered leaving only Jed and Lem with Merlin.

"You'll have some knights and guards to accompany you and everything will be done to get you safely home. Now Jed, let me check out those splints so you can go back to the others. Lem, how's Tommy?"

"He's with another family but I think he misses Rhylin."

Merlin laughed. The knights had ribbed Rhylin about his time as nursemaid but he'd taken it well and Romney had said that he would be in good stead should Arthur decide to chase slavers in the next couple of years, as he would certainly keep him in mind.

The kids were called to eat and as Merlin left one of them said, "We'll see you before we leave, won't we?"

"Yes and when the knights get back to Camelot, they'll be able to tell me that you arrived home safely." Merlin was purposely trying to sound positive as like Jed he wasn't too sure of what would await them.

He walked back to the inn and went looking for Arthur.

Meanwhile, Arthur was talking with Leon about the arrangements for getting the youngsters home. "Tomorrow, Romney with Simon, Rook, Aislin and two guard can get the children organised. Seems some farmer has a large wagon and is willing to take all the children to their villages. He'll be well paid."

"How about Merlin, he's good with them...?"

"No, I prefer to have him with me. The knights will try to have them placed in their original villages even if their parents are missing. They'll at least have friends there."

Leon looked at him surprised. Arthur usually wasn't so involved with children.

Arthur noticed the raised eyebrow and smiled, "After Treva's experiences, my priority regarding children has taken a change for the better or so Merlin tells me."

"Tells you what?" Merlin said as he strolled up to them.

Leon smiled, "That our worthy sire has the interests of all his subjects even the minors at heart."

-0-0-

The group were in high spirits when they set out for Camelot. They had four days of travel ahead them but they were glad to once more to be on the way home.

They would have to spend at least one night sleeping rough but if everything worked according plan, they should also be able to find inns. Arthur could pull rank and as king commandeer a village leader's home but he preferred to be independent even if it meant sleeping rough.

Gawaine didn't care either way as long as during the day they could find something more than water to slake his thirst.

And so the group had broken up. Leon was left to supervise the departure of the children and he would be following them as soon as possible.

Merlin realised that he was happy to be going home. The trip should be without incident and their chamber with its large comfortable bed would be awaiting their return. He smiled letting his mind wander exploring future possibilities.

Arthur looked at him saying, "Penny for your thoughts!"

Merlin could feel the colour creeping up his cheeks. He cleared his throat and said, "It was nothing. Just thinking about the boys."

"Well, should I be jealous that the boys bring such a satisfying look to your face? I beg to differ, I think it was the thought of a more mature male responsible for that look and might I hazard a guess as to whom that might be?"

"You certainly may but as I have no intention of enlightening you, it would be a waste of your time!"

"But, Merlin, I'm the king I have the right to know who is causing my friend to blush in that very attractive manner."

Merlin shrugged his shoulders, "And how pray do you intend to procure that information, Sire?"

Arthur smiled and leaning closer to Merlin whispered some thing which caused him to break into a grin.

He shook his head in mock disbelief and said, "Yes, Arthur, that might do the trick..."

They smiled happily at each other as Spenser called to them, "There's a little village about a mile ahead maybe some villager will be willing to sell us a pitcher of ale as Gawaine is flagging."

Gawaine upon hearing his name and one of his favourite beverages perked up and added, "You, Spenser, are a man after my own heart! Arthur, how is it that we are travelling with such a genius?"

"Nothing more than the luck of the draw."

Merlin added cheekily, "Good Sir Gawaine, why don't you ride ahead to see if you could rustle up lunch for us?"

"Your wish, O Favoured One, is my command. Come on Spenser, let's seek out some food suitable for a noble personage and his loyal knights." With that, the two of them rode past the king and cantered down the lane.

Iago fussed when the other horses left but soon settled when he realised that Mulgan was still trotting beside him. Merlin thought about the horses ages. Iago was, at seven still a youngster really, but Mulgan must have been close to nineteen. He did well on the rides but Arthur always gave him a good rest after an extended sortie.

Merlin's mind took him back to his beloved Gidun. He still missed him, no longer with the heart wrenching guilt but with more of a heart filled memory of a good friend with whom he had shared many an adventure and with whom he would always have an unbreakable bond.

Arthur's voice saying, "Thinking of that special person again?" broke into his daydreaming.

He grinned saying, "No! this time I promise it was above board. I was remembering the good times I had with Gidun. I was really lucky with him, wasn't I?"

"No more than you should have been. Everyone deserves at least one horse which leaves an indelible mark on his heart." He unconsciously leant forward and patted Mulgan.

They came out of the woods and could see a cluster of cottages.


	19. Chapter 19

**CHAPTER 19 : BEST LAID PLANS**

Later that evening, they arrived at a small village and Arthur decided to call it a day. The village had an inn but with limited accommodation. Arthur's face had fallen when he realised that a communal room was all that was on offer. Merlin watching him, laughed to himself knowing that Arthur wouldn't be happy until they were back in their own chambers.

For Gawaine, the fact that the place had ale was sufficient. He could sleep anywhere even upright if the need arose.

The evening meal was satisfying and soon all the knights, Merlin and the king were dead to the world. Life in those years was really attuned to the hours of daylight; villagers couldn't afford the luxury of wasting their precious wax candles. Early to bed and early to rise was the rule outside the castle.

The sun woke Merlin and he moved to collect his things and go downstairs to the pump in the courtyard. He dumped his bedroll in the stable, the guard on duty nodding at him. He returned to the pump. It was times like this that he appreciated hot water. The early morning air still had a nip in it, the water was freezing but he splashed his face and it wakened him further. He had no intention of stripping to the waist so he let that suffice.

He wandered into the ale room to be greeted by Leon who had already started on oatmeal and slices of freshly baked bread spread with pork drippings. "Arthur is just getting up and Gawaine is still dead to the world," he said.

Merlin smiled at the little maid and asked for two bowls of the porridge. Turning to Leon, he said, "Serve Arthur right if it's cold by the time he finally turns up and I'll take some bread and scrapings for Gawaine as he seldom manages to arrive on time."

They ate in silence and were finally joined by Arthur who said, "Hope everyone is well rested as we have a long day's ride ahead of us."

Horses saddled, bedrolls and saddle bags attached, finally everyone was ready to leave. By noon, they were ready for a break. Gavin and Spenser had ridden ahead and found another inn whose landlord had been only too willing to provide some food. They sat outside in the sun allowing the landlord's young son to water the horses, while they ate and agreed that the ale was one of the best in the area. The landlord boasted that his family had originally been millers but one part had turned their hands to brewing and finally moved to this area. Gawaine was interested and was soon on first name basis with the landlord and his wife.

But too soon it was time to again get back on the road. The sun had gone in and the weather turned chillier. Most of them would have been happier to stay where they were for the afternoon but Arthur wanted to get a few more miles under his belt before he turned in for the night.

-0-0-

Later it had started to rain. They were wet and tired and the accommodation offered at the next inn was one communal room with raised sleeping platforms. Arthur sighed and Merlin said, "It could have been worse, they could have offered us the barn, at least we'll be dry." Arthur tutted, had an ale and then left on the pretence of seeing where the horses would be stabled.

Merlin gave him a little time then rose to follow him. Gawaine winked at him saying, "Trouble in paradise?" Merlin shrugged his shoulds and grinned.

He found Arthur across from a shed, leaning against a post watching the horses. He slipped his hand across his shoulders and said, "I missed you!"

Arthur didn't turn; he just pulled Merlin in front of him and held him. "I just want to have some one-on-one time for the two of us even if it's just to sit and talk."

Merlin glanced at him and laughed saying, "You disappoint me, I had expected something a little more..."

Holding him away from himself, Arthur ran his hand up the back of Merlin's neck and said, "Do you think I haven't wanted that? I want you to myself, no peering eyes, just us. I want to be able to say what I want when I want. It's so hard..."

Merlin smiled, pulling Arthur closer. "We'll soon be home and then..." but Merlin said nothing more as Arthur kissed him. When they finally pulled apart, Merlin was willing to go further but Arthur reminded him that in two days they'd be home and he intended to spend a week locked in their chambers, admitting no one but Thomas who could bring them food.

They laughed together and walked across to the horses. Merlin gave each of the horses dried apples which he'd picked on the way to the barn. Arthur again wrapped him in his arms and kissed him. He kept saying softly, "We've waited before...we can wait again."

Merlin lay awake; he couldn't sleep because he knew that Arthur was also awake probably staring at the rafters in the little room lit by a misty moon. He loved him so much that even being able to hold his hand would have sufficed.

When the first light of dawn brightened the room, Merlin slipped from his bedroll and tiptoed across to Arthur who was snoring gently. He cupped his cheek in his hand and gently kissed his forehead. Arthur murmured his name and Merlin pulled away, leaving the room to go downstairs to the ale room.

He could hear the sounds of movement in the kitchen and soon the landlady arrived, "Did you sleep well, Sir? The bread is just out of the oven and I have some nice soft cheese." She busied herself with adding logs to the fire and nodded, "It will soon blaze up nice and warm."

Merlin smiled the thought of warm bread with melting cheese was welcoming

The landlady continued, "I also have some of the stew from yesterday or if you prefer we have already made porridge."

Spenser and Gavin joined him and the woman repeated what she had available. She left returning with the stew pot which she attached to the hook and pulled it over the fire.

-0-0-

When Arthur asked Leon who had caught up with them, to ride beside him, Merlin happily dropped back to ride with Spenser. He said, "Do you think that the boys have reached their village by now? Leon said that when he saw them off they were in high spirits."

"I worry about what they will face when they get home. So many adults were killed. Hopefully, someone will take pity on those orphaned and let them stay with them."

"Arthur did say that he was going to make sure that the villages received supplies to help them until they get on their feet." Merlin added, "They will be told that by the knights."

"Can you imagine being torn away from your family? The slavers must have been stupid to have taken such young kids. They are of little value as buyers want boys who can work immediately."

Merlin replied, "Once a neighbouring lord came through our village with his thugs and took half of our supplies and livestock. I must have been around eight. It was the first time that I had seen such behaviour by adults and I was scared not by the men as much as by the attitude of the villagers. Even the bravest men became submissive and my mother looked frightened and that frightened me and like a child, I clung to her skirts..."

"Merlin, you were a child. You were only eight."

"I could see my feelings in the eyes of the younger children. I couldn't understand the injustice of the whole episode. We'd worked hard all summer and when we were beginning to see the result of our labours, it was taken from us. I know that winter there were many who starved. The villagers tried to share but many of the old people gave up their food to the families with children. It took us a long time to welcome strangers into the village as we were all suspicious."

Their conversation was interrupted by Leon's holding his hand up to stop the others. They gathered around. "Arthur, has agreed that we will take a short break at the next inn we come to and then ride through until it is dark. It looks like it will stay clear so, we should be all right until after dusk as long as there is a moon."

Arthur added, "We will then be closer to Camelot and should, barring any problems be there by dusk tomorrow. We should be able to reach Deerstay Ridge tonight. There are some good camping sites there."

They all nodded. Arthur wasn't the only person who wanted to get back to the warmth and safety of Camelot. They'd been away long enough; they'd accomplished their mission and were ready to reach home.

"...and if we don't find somewhere to take a break mid afternoon...?"

"Don't worry, Gawaine, Arthur will pay for a round of drinks once we get back home. Right, Arthur?"

Arthur laughed, saying to the others, "Well, we know one thing for sure, we'll never forget about the need for drink and sustenance as long as Gawaine is with us."

Luck was on Gawaine's side, as within two hours they rode through a village that boasted a drinking establishment. Merlin managed to buy some loaves from the villagers. The word went around that they were for the king's knights so by the time Merlin left the village he had a sack tied to saddle with enough provisions to make a meal from scratch.

Once they were on the move again, Merlin smiled at Arthur, "Sir Knight, we are honoured to have you travelling with us."

Arthur laughed, "It's sometimes nice to travel incognito. You learn things about yourself that surprise you..."

"...and sometimes things about others as well."

They rode on in silence. The sun was beginning its descent and already the shadows were long and in the sections were the trees were close to the road, they could feel the drop in temperature. Deerstay Escarpment came on the horizon and Arthur knew that within the next couple of hours if everything kept going well, they would reach their stopover for the night.

Dusk seemed to come quickly and finally, Gavin recognised one of the trails. "This will lead to a little glen with a hermit's abandoned hovel. There's a stream and a little pasture."

They decided to make it their base for the night. It was close enough to the road to give them an easy start tomorrow. Once the horses were settled, the men sat around the fire and waited while Merlin and Gavin got a meal going. It would be basic but at least they wouldn't been retiring on empty stomachs.

They decided to set up their bedrolls near the fire as the hovel was a fallen in ruin. The men wandered into the woods to relieve themselves before settling down. Arthur left and Merlin followed him, Gawaine rose but Leon said, "Give them some time together…" He smiled, "Three's a crowd."

Gawaine smiled, "Hope you'll be as solicitous with me when I need some time with a special friend."

Leon laughed, punching him in the arm saying, "I've seen you operating and privacy is not one of your prerequisites."

Nodding, Gawaine said, "You have to take every opportunity offered! When a lovely lass shows interest, it's not the time to be backward in coming forward. Now is it, Sir Knight?"

-0-0-

Arthur looked over his shoulder and smiled as Merlin had followed him. "Coincidence or on purpose, Merlin?"

Merlin grinned as he reached Arthur and slipped his arms around him. It felt right feeling Arthur leaning back against him. "It seemed a shame not to take advantage of a situation. I hope you have some purpose in mind."

Arthur turned and claimed Merlin's lips. It seemed ages since they had had an opportunity to be together in private.

When they broke apart, Merlin said, "This time tomorrow, we'll be home in our own chamber. There'll be a raging fire in the hearth. I'll draw a bath and we will get out of these smelly clothes and have a good soak. We'll then climb into a real bed with clean linen and...I won't be able to keep my hands off you!

"I'll have you begging in no time..." Merlin dropped his voice and continued listing what he intended to do when he had Arthur at his mercy.

Arthur smiled into another kiss. He loosened Merlin's jacket and slid his hands around his back, pulling him to himself and enfolding him in his red cloak, he said, "As much as I would like to accommodate your fantasies, if you keep this up, we'll get no sleep. Then, tomorrow morning the others will leave without us and we'll have to spend another night sleeping rough." Arthur pulled back turning Merlin. With his arm around Merlin's waist, they started back to the others.

"But we'd be alone?"

"Yes... We'd be alone but the forest floor wouldn't get any softer and the night might be cold and wet. Come on look on the bright side, we're almost home…"

Merlin stopped, saying, "I really do have to pee."

"Good idea, it would be a bit difficult to leave our bedrolls for a second time when for all intents and purposes we left the group to 'pick a tree'."

Merlin arrived back first; he laid out Arthur's bedroll beside Spenser's and put his own beside Arthur's and next to Gawaine.

Gawaine winked at him and smiled, "Everything all right?"

Merlin nodded, "Goodnight, Gawaine!"

Arthur sauntered in a little later and Spenser glanced at him as he settled beside him, "Everything all right?"

Arthur smiled as he said, Great! ...'Night Spenser!"

-0-0-

The rain pelted down overnight. The cold woke Merlin so he forced himself to get up and see to the fire. Even in the shelter of a couple of boulders, it was ready to give up the ghost. He hated wet wood. Bad enough waking up wet and freezing but add to that the frustration of trying to get a fire beyond the smoky stage just added to his misery. In the end, glancing around to see that he was not watched, he whispered a few words of encouragement and flames started to lick the embers and being careful he made a pyramid of the drier kindling. Already he began to feel a little better. Slowly, he built up the fire and when he was satisfied stood back to admire his handiwork.

The horses hearing him up started to move around. It was still dark and he figured it was maybe a few hours to sunrise, not that they were likely to see it today. He decided he was warmer near the fire and hunkered down to wait for the others to wake up.

He must have dozed off for he was awoken by a hand on his shoulder.

"You deserve a medal for actions beyond the call of duty. Were you up all night tending this?" Leon said, pointing at the now blazing fire.

"Not really. I just didn't want to have to start from scratch with wet wood and cold hands. There is still some bread if you're hungry. Hopefully, we'll be able to stop at an inn and get something hot to drink. Everyone is soaking, look at the horses."

Leon glanced over at his dark bay, Mentor, he had his head down and rain was dripping off his nose and his mane. No longer bay, the horse looked black. Getting up, Leon walked over to him and patted him, "Don't worry, tonight I promise you a warm stable, double rations, deep straw and a good night's sleep."

Merlin who had followed Leon over, took the halters of Iago and Mulgan and promised them the same. "It's only a little rain and your skin is waterproof so you'll both survive. You'll warm up once we get going."

A voice said, "Would you two stop making love to your horses and get over here. Merlin, wrestle up something for us to eat."

"Yes, Oh Mighty One!" Merlin said under his breath causing Leon to laugh out loud.

"Whatever, you said was probably not complimentary but I'll let it pass as you redeemed yourself with the blazing fire." Arthur grinned, regardless of the weather he was in a good mood. Tonight he had the prospect of a warm chamber, plenty of food, clean bed linen and Merlin's promised ministrations. Who could ask for anything more?

Merlin in returning to the fire, managed to rub himself against him as he passed. As he knelt to get the remainder of the bread, he glanced grinning at Arthur who said, "Oh, it's going to be one of those days is it, Merlin?"

Merlin just said quietly, "Maybe…"

Arthur remembered the days when they were younger that they'd played games like that around the castle. Every opportunity was taken to be surreptitiously physical, mostly at inappropriate times often under the eye of his father and members of the council. He laughed to himself; Merlin under the guise of being a servant could get away with murder at meetings and banquets. Hands even legs and knees making fleeting contact and no one was ever the wiser.

Arthur smiled to himself; he remembered one private meeting in the throne room with Uther, Geoffrey and Gaius when Merlin had managed to stand behind Uther and proceeded to do an impromptu strip. He had removed his jacket and his neckerchief, untied and loosened the laces on his blouse and reached as far as starting to undo the laces on his pants. Geoffrey had had a coughing fit and Gaius had tears streaming down his face. Poor Uther was oblivious to what was going on behind him.

Merlin had never lost eye contact with Arthur who was squirming in his chair. He'd learned later that it was the result of Gaius advising Merlin that if he felt so strongly about Arthur that he should show him how he felt. Uther had left the room unaware of the drama.

Merlin had fixed his clothes and returned grinning, to his place beside Arthur. Geoffrey was shaking his head and smiling and Gaius had said, "Well, that was not what I had in mind but I think it went rather well. Don't you, Arthur?"

Arthur allowed his mind to wander to what had happened later that night and he smiled. Merlin wandered over and said, "I hardly think that that dry bread is giving enough pleasure to warrant such a smile."

Laughing at him Arthur said, "No Merlin I was back at that private meeting when you entertained Geoffrey, Gaius and I."

Merlin grinned, "Well, it accomplished its motive, didn't it?"

With the horses saddled, the fire was doused and the knights were standing around prior to mounting. Every time Merlin glanced at Arthur he was grinning. Merlin was filled with a happy feeling…tonight he'd be home.

He was busy on Mulgan's far side fixing Arthur's saddle bags. As Arthur mounted, swinging his leg over Mulgan, his boot gave Merlin a resounding smack in the head.

"Ow!" said Leon, "That must have hurt. Are you all right?" He held onto a confused looking Merlin who was holding his head. Leon explained, "Arthur's boot clouted you."

Interrupted by the fuss, Arthur turned hearing his name and realised that Leon was hanging onto an obviously shaken Merlin.

"Merlin, whatever were you doing standing there? I thought you were getting onto Iago." He dismounted, "Oh, my God, are you really hurt?"

"I'll survive but thank goodness that your boots are usually on the ground." Arthur touched Merlin's head tentatively as Merlin cringed saying, "God, for a second I thought my head was exploding. I didn't know what had hit me until Leon said that you'd swung into the saddle."

"Are you all right to ride? If necessary we can stay here or the others can ride on and we'll walk the horses until you're feeling better..." Arthur was unnerved by what had happened. "I really didn't mean to hurt you...it's not in me to hurt you!"

Merlin was beginning to feel a little better so he said, "Not like the time you slammed me into the bed post?"

"Well, that wasn't my intent; I thought you would fall onto the mattress and just harmlessly bounce."

"Or the time, you sent me off the side of the bed and then to add insult to injury managed to land on top of me!"

"Merlin, that was an accident!" He blushed a little as he said, "Maybe, I did get a bit carried away that night."

"As you did the time you almost drowned me in the lake…?"

"I thought that you were able to hold your breath longer than that..."

Merlin shook his head in disbelief, "Arthur, tell me again why you like me! You do like me don't you, because my life might be in less danger if you didn't?" He smiled at Arthur saying, "Come on, we have to leave if you want to get home this evening."

Gawaine who was relieved to see that Merlin was again himself, shook his head and smiled at the two of them.

They mounted and with Leon and Gawaine leading the way trotted along the trail with Arthur frequently watching Merlin to see that he was doing all right and thinking about what he had said.

When they came to a hill and slowed to a walk, he said seriously, "Merlin, I really do like you. If I have hurt you, it is probably because I don't think before I act. I see you and I can't wait to hold you close. I get all caught up in the moment and maybe I come on a little strong when you are not expecting it…I'll try to be more careful in the future, no more throwing you onto the bed or surprising you by kissing you under water."

Merlin turned to him and smiled saying, "I know…it was just a good opportunity to remind you of the consequences I live with in loving you. I think I might have to appeal for danger pay."

"Merlin, I never pay you anyway so how would danger pay make a difference."

"Well, it might as when I know that you are in a let's call it a boisterous mood, I could substitute my stunt double who could take all the knocks and scratches"

"…and the loving?"

"Are you crazy, I wouldn't pass up on that any day!" So saying, he started to canter as the road had levelled off, turning to Arthur to smile cheekily adding, "Come on, Arthur, keep up!"


	20. Chapter 20

**CHAPTER 20 : FAMILY, HOME AND HEARTH **

Arthur led the knights through the portcullis. He smiled as he made his way to the steps. It was good to be home.

Merlin had dismounted and was holding Mulgan for Arthur, he then handed both of the horses over to a groom. He nodded at an older man, the Master of the Horse who was standing on the steps. He walked over to him and mentioned that Mulgan had been lagging. They both agreed that maybe the whole journey had taken a bit out of him. Sir Malcolm would tell the head groom to keep an eye on him.

"All the others seemed to come through it fine," added Merlin.

The other man smiled, Merlin was observant and an excellent judge of horses. "How did Iago behave?"

"He started out like a jack-in-a-box but coming home he behaved like a trooper. Couple of days and he'll be back to his old tricks. If Arthur needs to go out maybe he could take either Favoury or Rhydian. I'm going to give Iago a break and use Burton. By the way, how's young Treva coming on? He's got a way to go, I know but I would like to see him riding Lord de Vire's horse. He is technically his."

"He was on him this week but he's still too small. The horse is so clever he almost reads his rider's mind and he'd never hurt the boy but he's still a bit over-horsed by Burton. If the king asks tell him, I think that his ward if he keeps on as he is now, is going to be someone to contend with on horseback when he's grown up."

"Maybe a contestant for the Melee à Cheval at future Camelot tournaments," Merlin suggested hopefully. He thanked the kind knight and left to go up the stairs. Smiling to himself, he shook his head, 'Treva, old enough to compete in the tournaments! Arthur would laugh at that...'

It was good to be back home. He'd missed the boy, his own bed and their ever capable servant Thomas. Now, he was worth his weight in gold, if anyone was!

He saw Gaius and walked over to him. He was glad to see him looking so well, "I've lots to tell you but give me a day to settle in."

"Well, you look as if you have been to the wars. What happened to your temple? That's some bruise."

"I bumped into Arthur's boot."

Gaius immediately had a worried look on his face so Merlin smiled, "It was an accident, I was in the wrong place when Arthur was mounting and contact was made. Don't think anymore about it. No one was at fault..."

"You and Arthur all right?"

"Yes, Gaius, we're fine or we will be if I get to him before nightfall." Merlin laughed gave Gaius a hug and the two of them walked up the steps together. "By the way, where's Treva?" I thought he might have been here."

"He was but he went off with Arthur, chattering a mile a minute. Anyway, it's great to have you back safe and sound. Well, almost sound…" Gaius said looking again at his head.

When they were inside, Merlin said, "Better catch up to the others as heaven knows what the two of them will get up to."

Gaius laughed and continued on his way. He felt happier having the two of them back in the castle. He always worried a little when they weren't home. That bruise on Merlin's temple looked nasty and although he trusted Arthur would never intentionally hurt Merlin, stranger things had happened. He sighed to himself, he was becoming an old worrier but in all honesty, he couldn't help it as Merlin was family.

-0-0-

Treva was bouncing along as he hung on Arthur's hand dragging him along saying, "Arthur, I'd better show you the way to your new chamber 'cause Humphrey had everything moved while you were away and Thomas said that you and Merlin will now be living there.

"Thomas even let me have a look around. Wasn't that kind of him? Randall said it was. I was really good I didn't bother them but when I saw them moving your furniture, I got scared as I thought that you might be leaving. Gaius told me not to worry as you were only moving into your father's old chambers because they were bigger than the ones you had."

He looked at Arthur hopefully and said, "If you have no one to take over your old chambers, I could. We would be on the same corridor, it would be fun."

Arthur looked at his ward and said, "But you have a perfectly good chamber of your own and you have Randall to look after you."

"Yes," said Treva, "But if I was here, Merlin could look after me and then I could help him look after you."

Arthur smiled, loving how Treva's mind worked. But he nipped that in the bud by saying, "Treva, I think that you are better off in your own chamber until you're older and then Merlin and I will discuss it." He smiled thinking how inconvenient it would be with Henry and Treva dropping by to visit whenever the mood struck them.

"That's all right, Arthur. Anyway, there's room for me to have a sleep over in your new place 'cause you have so many chambers...maybe Henry could even come with me."

"We'll see..." said Arthur loving how the boy had everything arranged and deciding that at the first opportune moment, he would put Merlin in charge of this little problem.

He was looking forward to seeing the new place which Merlin and he had changed so that it would suit them.

-0-0-

Merlin automatically nodded at the two guards on duty at the top of the flight of stairs as made his way along the royal corridor. He really wasn't concentrating on the present as he pushed open the door to the antechamber and made his way to the bedchamber. The stale air and the cold hit him immediately. He froze, his eyes accustoming him to what he was seeing.

The room was practically empty. The bed stood in its usual place but the bed curtains had been twisted into four huge knots. The windows were tightly sealed and the hearth was bare. He'd been so far away in his mind that it took some time to realise what he was seeing…an abandoned…vacant room. A table and chairs stood in front of the window. A carpet was rolled in front of the empty hearth. He looked around, bare furniture, no candles, no sign that this was someone's chamber.

Slowly recognition set in. They had been moved in their absence. He hadn't considered that, he had expected to be actively involved in the move but then he remembered that Arthur's staff in his absence would have taken care of all that. He knew that the other chambers were ready but in his own mind, he had thought that he would have been involved in the time frame of the move.

He knew that he was being less than gracious. He thought, 'How many people would have enjoyed returning home to find that they had been moved lock stock and barrel without having to even lift a finger and that their upcoming move had been taken care of in their absence?'

He shrugged his shoulders and returned to the antechamber. He met Gawaine as he was closing the outer door.

"Forgotten where you live?" the knight enquired with a grin.

Merlin said sharply, "Of course not!" Then looking at his friend he smiled guiltily saying, "Well, yes, I actually did forget about the move."

"Don't worry about it, many times when I come back after a night on the town, I blunder into the wrong chamber, just be thankful that I have never suddenly appeared beside your bed. Arthur would have had a fit and certainly he wouldn't be as kind as some of the occupants of the rooms into which I have wandered, who have let me kip on their beds for the rest of the night."

The longer Merlin spoke with Gawaine the more grounded he became in the present, "Well, I'd better be on my way. Arthur will be wondering where I have disappeared to."

"Want me to escort you to your room, Dear Sir? I'm going there to return a map Arthur gave me."

Merlin laughed, "Actually, I think I can manage to find it myself but thanks for the kind offer. Give me the map and I'll see that he gets it."

Gawaine left calling over his shoulder, "We're all eating in the little dining hall this evening, so if you want company, join us. However, I have a feeling that maybe, Arthur will have other plans!"

Merlin smiled cheekily saying. "I rather hope so!" He turned and walked along the corridor. Reaching the door to his new chambers, he stopped. Normally, he would just have walked in but he felt uncomfortable. He knew that he was being silly, but he raised his hand and gave a tap on the door and waited. He had never walked into this chamber unannounced and even now he felt strange even contemplating opening the door. He could imagine Arthur's look of disbelief that he just hadn't walked in but something was holding him back.

Thomas opened the door with a smile, not betraying any surprise that Merlin should have knocked, "Merlin, glad to see you safely home. The king and Treva are in the sitting room. Is it to be a small group for supper or will I just bring supper tonight for the two of you?"

"Just the two of us," Merlin managed to get out before he was almost bowled over by Treva.

"Merlin, I wondered if you had got lost, I was going to come and find you."

Merlin handed Thomas the rolled map, saying, "Treva, I know places in this castle that are beyond your wildest dreams. I hardly think I was going to get lost coming to my own chamber, do you?"

"No, I don't but Arthur was looking worried as you never arrived."

"So," said a voice from the doorway, "You're finally here, I was wondering what had happened to you. Hoped you hadn't decided to withdraw your services!"

Shaking his head at Arthur and glancing in Treva's direction, Merlin said, "Have I ever, Sire, given you that impression?"

Arthur smirked and drew him into the apartments saying, "Treva will give you a tour as he did me."

Treva did an excellent job in explaining the function of each of the rooms, "This is where Thomas would sleep except he usually returns to his family rooms at night. Doesn't he?"

Merlin gave Arthur a frown as he heard him say, "Yes, thank God!"

"Then we have a sitting room where you can entertain special friends." He walked through an adjourning door into a room containing a large table with bookshelves around the room. "This is where Arthur will write up documents and sign important papers," he informed Merlin. Across the hall they reached the dining room which was larger than their previous one but just as well appointed.

Merlin nodded, saying over his shoulder to Arthur, "I think the others will approve."

The small tour guide continued, "Now we come to your private quarters. You have a large bedchamber with a private sitting area and…" with a flourish, he opened the door to a solar. Merlin was impressed; he liked the lighter wood and furnishings. He could imagine the room flooded with sunlight.

"Oops, I forgot the water closet, but you know what that looks like except it has a really large tub. I think you could swim in it!"

Arthur caught Merlin's eye and smiled catching the tip of his tongue between his lips as if he were going to make an inappropriate comment but had stopped in time. Merlin caught himself grinning.

Treva hadn't finished as he also managed to mention the extra bed chamber, formerly the queen's and the secret stairway for the queen's maidservants to go downstairs without disturbing the king. "Of course, this chamber would be good for me to use when I come for a sleepover. Right, Arthur?"

Arthur leant over and tousled his hair, "I told you we would take it under consideration but for now the chamber remains empty."

There was a tap at the door and Merlin said, "Come in!"

"Sire," said Thomas to Arthur, "Randall is here to take the young master down to supper with the pages and your supper will be up directly."

Arthur said, "Thank you, Thomas. We'll eat in the sitting room as it's nice and warm." Thomas bowed and left.

While Merlin added, "Now, Treva, you mustn't keep Randall waiting but thank you for giving me the tour of the new chambers, you did an excellent job. I feel right at home." He wished he did but he knew deep down that he didn't. Treva was following Thomas down the corridor to the antechamber as Arthur slipped his hand down Merlin's back. He shuddered slightly and continued saying, "By the way, I heard some very nice things about you from Sir Malcolm, who is quite impressed. I will be telling Arthur later."

The boy turned and ran back to Merlin burying his head into him. He whispered, "I try really, I do, Merlin."

Merlin smiled, "We know you do and we are both very proud of you, aren't we, Arthur?"

Pulling the boy to him, Arthur said, "We couldn't be any prouder. Now off you go!"

-0-0-

Merlin walked back to the bedchamber and checked the cupboards, all their cloths had been transferred. The large travelling chest and various sundry items were also present. He walked back towards the fire and smiled and thought, '…warm bed tonight!' as he saw the warming pans hanging beside the hearth. He pulled the heavy drapes over the windows and perched absently on the upholstered double chair in front of the fire, Arthur joined him.

"Should we eat first?"

Merlin looked at him slightly confused and then said, "Yes, I'm hungry but I'm also thirsty."

Arthur walked over to the sideboard and brought back a jug of beer and two tankards. "Might as well, wet your whistle while we wait for the meal. Do you like how the chambers turned out?"

Taking the tankard, Merlin glanced around saying, "Yes, it turned out nicely. Mind you, we might want to move some things around but I think we should live in it for a couple of days before making changes."

"Wasn't Treva funny? Seems he'd been upset when he saw them emptying our old chamber as he thought we were leaving him here alone and Randall arranged for him to visit the new chambers to put his mind at rest. He seems so well settled and yet every now and again something comes up which throws him off."

"I think that is going to be an reoccurring worry for him. He went through hell on earth and I'm impressed that he has come as far as he had. By the way, Sir Malcolm said that he is really doing well with the horses. He's even been on Burton, however, he's still too large for him. He says that he has what it takes to be a great rider. Maybe in years to come, we'll have a Camelot Knight who is a serious contender in the Melee à Cheval!"

Arthur slipped his arm around Merlin's shoulder but they were interrupted by a tap on the door and Thomas announced that their meal had been laid out in their private sitting room.

"Thank you, Thomas, there is no need to wait around, we'll manage by ourselves tonight. I'll see you tomorrow morning." Thomas nodded and left. He was being dismissed early, his family would be pleased.

Arthur turned and grinned at Merlin, "First to table…and then to bed!" But if Arthur had glanced more closely, he would have seen that the smile did not reach Merlin's eyes.

Merlin removed the cover from the pot which Thomas had left on the hearth, the aroma of chicken filled his nostrils. He brought it to the table and divided it into two bowls. He smiled at Arthur, "Happy to be home?"

Digging into the pottage, Arthur nodded, "...and do I see roast boar? This alone is almost worth returning for..." Arthur gave Merlin the once over and grinned.

Merlin wasn't enjoying the meal. He felt strange, something was not right; the food was great but his appetite had disappeared. He felt a knot in his throat and Arthur's insinuations instead of being welcomed and amusing were unsettling.

Arthur leant over and ran his had up Merlin's thigh, he flinched and Arthur's surprise was apparent, "Merlin, what's wrong?"

"Nothing!"

"You've only tasted the pottage and you jumped like girl when I touched you. Something has upset you. What is it? Come on out with it!" Arthur was watching him carefully. He'd been all right as they entered the courtyard what or who had happened since then?

Knowing that something was wrong was making Merlin second guess their decision to relocate. He thought fondly of their old chamber. There had been no secrets there. This meal would have been a celebratory homecoming but not here…Merlin no longer felt at home.

Arthur watched him like a hawk. He could see the fleeting wishful look on Merlin's face and realised sadly that it had nothing to do with him. He finished the rest of the meal in silence. He knew that when he was ready Merlin would speak to him and he had no intention of spending their first night in their new chambers arguing. Merlin would come round when he was ready.

Merlin removed Arthur's plate and carried the platters into the antechamber, Thomas could take care of them in the morning. He had only eaten a half bowl of soup as the smell and the look of the food made him feel nauseous.

-0-0-

Arthur walked through into their bed chamber. He pulled the curtains aside and glanced down into the courtyard bathed in the light of one of the braziers which burned overnight. Outside, everything seemed right with the world, jus a shame that it didn't feel the same inside the chamber. He sat down and patted the seat beside him.

Merlin walked over and sat down not touching him. Arthur pulled him over and held him until he finally relaxed against him. They sat like that for some time but then Merlin disentangled himself, finally standing. He made his way to the fire and ladled hot ashes into the two warming pans, he placed them in the bed and returned to the fire.

Staring at the vast hearth, Merlin froze mesmerised by the falling embers representing burning cities and kingdoms. His mind lost focus and he let his feelings take over. He was suddenly uncomfortable. He had slept with Arthur as he had travelled the length and breadth of the land but tonight in this chamber he had doubts which he couldn't explain.

His mind retreated to the first time he'd helped Arthur get ready to retire after Uther's death. He had retreated into his servant mode, saying, "Good night, Sire!" Arthur had seemed surprised and even shocked that Merlin intended to retire to the manservant's room.

"Merlin, it's me Arthur. I haven't changed, it's just the world has changed around me, but it's still me... Don't be silly, come to bed!"

Upset at his mixed feelings, Merlin had blushingly explained that he knew Arthur loved him but that had been as a crown prince now that he was the king, he had wondered if he felt the same way and was giving him an opportunity to bail out of the relationship, should he have had a change of mind. It had broken his heart to consider the idea but he knew that he had to do it.

However, everything had worked out.

He jumped back to the present but the feeling still remained. He never felt inadequate but there was something worrying him. He couldn't put his finger on it but it was as real as a thorn in his thumb.

When Arthur spoke to him, he'd come back quickly to the present, not happily but at least he was both physically and mentally in the same place.

"Merlin, where are you? You haven't moved for five minutes. Are you all right?"

Shaking his head trying to clear it, he said unconvincingly, "Nothing's wrong. I was just thinking."

Arthur's arms wrapped around him and he pulled him to him. "Merlin, please, there is something upsetting you. Don't be like this. Tell me! Is it something I've said? Something I have done? Don't shut me out! You're scaring me..."

Turning Merlin said, "It's not you, it's me. I feel uncomfortable standing in this chamber and contemplating getting undressed. I feel as if I don't belong here..."

Arthur again held him as he said, "But it's only us...you My Love, and me…no one but us. We're just further along the corridor than usual, that's all. Here, let me help you...!" Merlin allowed Arthur to help him get out of his jacket and tunic. He was shivering. "You're cold, I'm sure Thomas must have heated some water." He dragged Merlin into the quite luxurious water closet. The fire under the coppers was still burning and Arthur checked the water. It was still hot, so he filled the bath.

Merlin slipped off the rest of his clothes and sank into the warm water. He smiled uncertainly at Arthur, "Are you going to join me?"

Arthur shook his head. "No, this is your moment to relax. You're always looking out for me; let me take care of you."

"Arthur, I'm not sick, I just felt a little insecure and unsure of the situation."

"All the more reason for me to play nursemaid…!" Arthur shook his head as Merlin flicked him with water. "Now, Master Merlin, no silly games or I will have to speak to the King about your behaviour."

Arthur noticed that Merlin went very quiet and suddenly, he realised what was happening. Merlin was reacting to being in Uther's former bedchamber. He now understood Merlin's reticence in getting undressed and his heart went out to him.

He knelt by the tub taking Merlin's head in his hands and kissing him gently. "It's all right, He's long gone. These are now my royal chambers and as my lover, it is only right that you should be here beside me. Put all thoughts of my father out of your mind...it's you and me now, as it always was and always will be."

He pulled Merlin up and gently wrapped him in a large bath sheet. He led him to the fire. He put more wood on the fire and removed the warming pans as Merlin dried himself.

"Arthur, you know, I wasn't second guessing your love, I think I was just a little overcome by memories."

"I know but these are our chambers and I think we can be very happy here, don't you?"

Merlin nodded, with Arthur beside him, he could put aside all the memories of Uther's single minded desire to punish those he saw as abominations of nature. Arthur was king and he held no such beliefs.

Arthur led Merlin towards the bed. Merlin went willingly; he loved and trusted Arthur with his life. He felt calmer. He sat on the edge of the bed; he was warm and completely relaxed. So, he let himself fall back on the soft mattress curling himself into a ball, he closed his eyes. He stayed where he had fallen.

Arthur smiled and said quietly, "Decided to sleep on my side of the bed tonight, Merlin? Well, they say change is good for the soul..." He pulled the covers over him.

Arthur brushed Merlin's hair off his forehead and ran his finger down his nose to his lips. Merlin nuzzled into his hand and murmured Arthur's name. He was almost asleep.

Arthur smiled and walked back around the bed. 'Oh well!' he thought, 'All last night's promises in the woods will have to be put on hold.' He slipped into bed beside the man he loved, saying quietly to himself, "They always say, 'Good things come to those who wait'…!"

**THE END**


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